For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Okay, this is one for fathers, and therefore mostly the older posters.

I've been a father for over 10 years now, 3 children. I still remember my first one's birth very vividly.

It was a Monday, late November 1995, and the evening by the time he was delivered. It was a relatively short labour, and the little guy was 2 weeks early, but still 8 and a half pounds.

He was born on 9:40pm in the evening. I remember this cos back then, X-Files was big, and run on a Monday from 9-9:50pm, and I remember thinking absently '10 minutes of the X-Files left'. I tend to think dumb things like that in intense situations.

Afterwards, he was checked over and cleaned up, and pretty strong and healthy, they gave him to me while the midwife took my wife for a bath. They left me in a little room with a dim light, sitting in an armchair, all alone with my new son.

He was so light, and he kept looking around the room, and then looking up at me, straight into my eyes. All the time, just looking straight into my eyes with his enormous, dark eyes, and then a quick look around the room. Each time he looked up, it felt like he was thinking 'this guy's okay, he'll look after me.' He was quiet and didn't cry, and 24 hours before I would have been terrified of being left alone with a little baby, but this just felt right.

It was very peaceful. Finally, about 1 or 2 am, I left them at the hospital and went home alone. Slept, went back the next day, and had to leave for an hour or two during lunch time, when I wandered into town.

As I walked in, I remember feeling scared, thinking how now there was one other being in the world that I'd actually do absolutely anything for, before I let him come to harm. I grew terrified about how destroyed I'd be if he was to die, is the bottom line, it was like a wave of panic. It was a profoundly and shockingly deep feeling, and it grew as I walked around the busy town in a sort of daze. Finally I went back, and the feeling disappeared as something powerful by the time I got back, and I felt okay again.

I don't know if many new fathers get something like this. I think each guy is probably completely different in how he reacts.

Can you remember your feelings when your first one was born? What was it like?

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I remember the day very vividly, but honestly, when my first child was born, it was like a couple of weeks before I really felt any kind of bond. It bothered my for awhile but I've since been told that it's fairly common for new fathers, first time fathers in particular. Now my kids mean pretty much everything. Nothing I wouldn't do.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Yeah, I was surprised how fast it was for me. I really think being left with the little guy in a quiet, low-lit room, with him looking up at me and being very calm, must have accelerated it quite a lot.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I remember it quite well. It was exactly 37 years and 7 days ago. Ten days after the birth I was in Vietnam. I did not expect to see him again.

Somehow, 28 years later, I was in another delivery room, in scrubs, with 24 medical professionals who were involved in various aspects of the delivery of my 50-day-premature twin daughters. Ten days after the birth, I carried them home. I've never left their side since.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I was in the delivery room. What a horrible custom that is. I'd much rather live in the "Father's Waiting Room" era.

C-section, wife is out cold. I'm standing next to her head, video camera in hand. That's another stupid custom. I refuse to watch the video. I didn't even want to bring a camera, but everyone urged me to, so I did. I didn't bring any cameras for subsequent visits to the delivery room.

I was working at the IP sportsbook at the time, and it's the day after the Superbowl, so the entire video is the doctor and I talking about prop bets.

Finally, I hear a "squish, plop!" noise. The kid is out.

And she's not crying.

Uh-oh.

Nobody on the staff sounds panicked, but their body language has changed completely. We've gone from "routine" to "urgent" without anyone saying a word.

The head nurse has the kid, and is walking quickly over to the "clean the baby up" table. The kid lets out a half-hearted welp, which I decide is better than nothing. And I catch a glimpse of my daughter for the first time: she's blue.

I can't remember exactly what happened next. Bottom line is, she had a partially collapsed lung. They got her breathing, and everything was fine within minutes.

That fear of the kid potentially being in harm's way that DB mentioned--I got to feel that when she was two seconds old. Abject terror.

I wasn't at the hospital when my second kid was born. I can't remember why not, but I got there when it was all over. Instead of a blue kid, this time we got a yellow one (jaundice). "She's in the nursery. They have her in one of those glass cases, under UV lights, to treat the jaundice."

Down to the nursery I go. I find the glass case with the lights. There's my little girl. They have a blindfold on her, to protect her eyes from the lights. And they have her hands tied behind her back, so she doesn't tug at the blindfold.

Somebody could've taken a minute, and prepared me for that sight. I became completely unglued for a few minutes.

Third kid, third color: pink. Healthy! About damn time.

At that point, we quit while we were ahead.

(This thread where men talk about their feelings strikes me as very un-macho. My father would not approve.)

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

DB,

Great post......

....I just hope when I spawn my demon child that I will have a similar experiences to yours...

GG

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Down to the nursery I go. I find the glass case with the lights. There's my little girl. They have a blindfold on her, to protect her eyes from the lights. And they have her hands tied behind her back, so she doesn't tug at the blindfold.

Somebody could've taken a minute, and prepared me for that sight. I became completely unglued for a few minutes.


[/ QUOTE ]

Holy crap. That's just awful. How could they not warn you of it? [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

Thanks for sharing though. Parenthood is a long, long march, and you really don't get to ease into it, do you.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

A good thread...I've been a father for just a little over a month now and it's crazy how much your life changes once you become a father. My daughter Rachel Michelle was born March 30th at 9:54 pm weighing 9lbs 8oz and 21 inches long. Our digital camera has been very handy and I advise any soon to be fathers out there to make sure to have one. I have taken over a couple hundred pictures in the past month. All in all it's been great my wife and daughter love our daughter very much even though she enjoys waking us up between 3-6am heh but it's all good. Theres my little story kind of hard to forget since it was only a month ago. Looking forward to more stories.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I remember giving birth to my number tWo. Sitting on that cold plastic toilet lid, elbows on knees and giving a satisfying squeeze it slid out and sploshed into the bowl.

It stank of victory.

AFTER THAT I SMEARED POO EVERYWHERE.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

It was pretty quick for me but horrible non the less, was overdue so they broke her waters. Hooked up the tens machine, I was in charge of the control and turned it up a touch too much she nearly bounced off the ceiling.

Labour was very quick but we had a problem that the nurse assisting was a trainee she was ending training she checked when the head was out for the cord etc but screwed up. SO cord was round which meant my daughter came out not breathing properly, so she was shoved in front of her mams nose then rushed off to get oxygen.

Very scary moreso for me as our lass was out of it on the gas and air, but everything was fine.

I think looking back now though while it is a life defining moment and people build up to it as the pregnancy goes on as a main even, I think though that the highlights come a lot later in parental life moreso once the broken sleep nights and nappies finish.

Then the buggers become teens and I see what a pain in the ass my stepson currently is I would say make sure you make the most of these early years.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I remember my first born like it was only six months ago. Oh, wait, it was only six months ago...

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

What I remember most from the delivery room is the smell. Nasty.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Okay, this is one for fathers, and therefore mostly the older posters.

I've been a father for over 10 years now, 3 children. I still remember my first one's birth very vividly.

[/ QUOTE ]

"That's what made me pass out in the first place."

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Heh. Mine were both by c-section and I was in the operating room for both. Jar of dirt under the bed because their grandad insisted they be "born over Texas soil" even though we were in St. Louis.

By the way, DB, you'll apreciate this, for some weird reason I started humming "Blow the Man Down" to my kid to soothe him. I didn't really even realize what it was for months after I'd been humming and whistling it to him. Anyway my son's earliest memories are of a pirate chantey.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Me and the Mrs were sitting at home. I was playing a MTT and she was watching when she told me that she was having some pains ... not labor pains, but she was concerned about them and called the hospital and they told her to come in to see the doctor. I was just outside the bubble with a decent stack, but even I know this was not the time to argue with her about overreacting (which she tends to do).

Anyway, we head over to the Hospital and they put us in a room and hooked her up to a bunch of monitors and basically said to just sit around and we'll call in the doctor if things look strange and if not you'll see him in the morning.

Things don't look too abnormal so we get a couple hours of sleep before the doctor shows up around 6:30AM and says that things are probably OK, but he is going to go ahead and induce labor just to be on the safe side since my wife had symptoms of Preeclampsia and the baby should be far enough along to deliver (the due date was about 3 weeks away).

So they give my wife the Pitocin and tell us we should have a baby by the end of the day. At this point, she tells me to go home and grab the suitcase we had packed and get myself some breakfast (they wouldn't let her eat anything at this point) so I run off and grab a biscuit on my way back (we lived about 5 min from the hospital).

For most of the day we waited for somethign to happen, my wife had some minor contractions but the labor never really seemed to advance and she never really dialated beyond a couple cm. By 5:00 they had decided to do a C-section and they would come get her in a little bit (which in Hospitalease usually means about an hour), this was a big disappointment to my wife who really wanted to go through the delivery process (after all we did take all those classes!). I got to go out to the waiting room and let the parents know what was going on and told them to go grab some food becasue they wouldn't be able to see her for a while. When I got back to the room they were already moving her into the OR, and gave me some scrubs to put on if I wanted to go back with her.

Obviously I wasn't going to miss the birth of my daughter so I put them on and followed them back. They put me in the surgeon's lounge to wait for them to do all the stuff they need to do prior to actually doing the delivery. I sat and sat and sat and finally they told me to go into the OR. When I get in, my wife has about the most pathetic look on her face and a curtain across her chest so we can't really see what they are doing (which is a good thing). After a couple minutes, they pull out the tiniest baby I had ever seen and after flashing her to us run her over to a table under a warming lamp to clean her up and do the intial tests to make sure she's ok. My wife is getting really restless about wanting to see her and after a couple minutes they bring her back over and she finally gets to see our 4lb 14oz baby girl.

At this point they tell my wife that she will need to go to the recovery room after getting stitched back up and the baby and I will be back in the room waiting on her. So here I was alone with Alyssa, my baby girl, and I have no clue how long we would be waiting on her mother. All sorts of feeling are going though my head, I'm worried about her mom, I'm scared I'm gonna do somethign stupid and hurt her because she's so small, but mostly I'm just overwhelmed by the fact that I am now the father of the most beautiful baby in the world. This will be 2 years ago next Thursday.

Anyway, I've rambled on way too long already so I'll leave it at that.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
(This thread where men talk about their feelings strikes me as very un-macho. My father would not approve.)

[/ QUOTE ]

Totally rocks. There were lots of things our dads had right, maybe more than we do, but there were lots of things we have a lot more right than they did.

I favor them in not bringing a video camera into the room to film the birth. And never dreaming of saying, "We're pregnant." Or ever using the word "preggers."

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
It was pretty quick for me but horrible non the less, was overdue so they broke her waters. Hooked up the tens machine, I was in charge of the control and turned it up a touch too much she nearly bounced off the ceiling.

Labour was very quick but we had a problem that the nurse assisting was a trainee she was ending training she checked when the head was out for the cord etc but screwed up. SO cord was round which meant my daughter came out not breathing properly, so she was shoved in front of her mams nose then rushed off to get oxygen.

Very scary moreso for me as our lass was out of it on the gas and air, but everything was fine.

I think looking back now though while it is a life defining moment and people build up to it as the pregnancy goes on as a main even, I think though that the highlights come a lot later in parental life moreso once the broken sleep nights and nappies finish.

Then the buggers become teens and I see what a pain in the ass my stepson currently is I would say make sure you make the most of these early years.

[/ QUOTE ]

All teenagers are pains. Good on you if you're taking care of your stepson and being a good father to him even if he's being a typical teenager. So many stepdads drop the ball so terribly.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Me and the Mrs were sitting at home. I was playing a MTT and she was watching when she told me that she was having some pains ... not labor pains, but she was concerned about them and called the hospital and they told her to come in to see the doctor. I was just outside the bubble with a decent stack, but even I know this was not the time to argue with her about overreacting (which she tends to do).

Anyway, we head over to the Hospital and they put us in a room and hooked her up to a bunch of monitors and basically said to just sit around and we'll call in the doctor if things look strange and if not you'll see him in the morning.

Things don't look too abnormal so we get a couple hours of sleep before the doctor shows up around 6:30AM and says that things are probably OK, but he is going to go ahead and induce labor just to be on the safe side since my wife had symptoms of Preeclampsia and the baby should be far enough along to deliver (the due date was about 3 weeks away).

So they give my wife the Pitocin and tell us we should have a baby by the end of the day. At this point, she tells me to go home and grab the suitcase we had packed and get myself some breakfast (they wouldn't let her eat anything at this point) so I run off and grab a biscuit on my way back (we lived about 5 min from the hospital).

For most of the day we waited for somethign to happen, my wife had some minor contractions but the labor never really seemed to advance and she never really dialated beyond a couple cm. By 5:00 they had decided to do a C-section and they would come get her in a little bit (which in Hospitalease usually means about an hour), this was a big disappointment to my wife who really wanted to go through the delivery process (after all we did take all those classes!). I got to go out to the waiting room and let the parents know what was going on and told them to go grab some food becasue they wouldn't be able to see her for a while. When I got back to the room they were already moving her into the OR, and gave me some scrubs to put on if I wanted to go back with her.

Obviously I wasn't going to miss the birth of my daughter so I put them on and followed them back. They put me in the surgeon's lounge to wait for them to do all the stuff they need to do prior to actually doing the delivery. I sat and sat and sat and finally they told me to go into the OR. When I get in, my wife has about the most pathetic look on her face and a curtain across her chest so we can't really see what they are doing (which is a good thing). After a couple minutes, they pull out the tiniest baby I had ever seen and after flashing her to us run her over to a table under a warming lamp to clean her up and do the intial tests to make sure she's ok. My wife is getting really restless about wanting to see her and after a couple minutes they bring her back over and she finally gets to see our 4lb 14oz baby girl.

At this point they tell my wife that she will need to go to the recovery room after getting stitched back up and the baby and I will be back in the room waiting on her. So here I was alone with Alyssa, my baby girl, and I have no clue how long we would be waiting on her mother. All sorts of feeling are going though my head, I'm worried about her mom, I'm scared I'm gonna do somethign stupid and hurt her because she's so small, but mostly I'm just overwhelmed by the fact that I am now the father of the most beautiful baby in the world. This will be 2 years ago next Thursday.

Anyway, I've rambled on way too long already so I'll leave it at that.

[/ QUOTE ]

but did you survive the bubble and make the money or did you get blinded off??? I swear, some people have no idea what's important in a story.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

talk to me in about a month. i have my first baby due at the beginning of june. june 5 actually. im a nervous and excited wreck.

if the baby is born one day late his birthday will be 6.6.06. my wife say's we're naming him damien.

gunny, i like the pirate humming story. pretty good. and although i feel a bond w/ him already, nice to know i shouldnt be weirded out if its not as strong as i hope right after the birth. im a bit scared of that, along w/ a lot of things.


bwana

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Eat the placenta!

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Great Thread. 2 children for me and two stories.

My son was born in 1981 (yah, I'm old) and my wifes doctor was leaving on vacation the following week so she was induced. Pictocin is a very powerful drug and my wife was having a pretty hard time of it. She was in very hard labor for a number of hours. The nurses were not being very responsive at all and hadn't even checked on her in awhile. Finally, having had enough of the BS, I called the Dr. myself. It helped that his son and I were classmates. About a half hour later the Doc comes in, takes one look and then just ripped into the nurse. Come to find out that my son was breach and the Dr. actually had to use forceps to deliver him. The nurse ended up leaving the hospital and my son was fine. However, during the delivery my wife was squeezing my hand and broke my index finger. So there we are, my wife laying there with the Dr. delivering our son and a nurse applying a splint to my finger.

My daughter was born 5 years later. No real drama there except for the point where my wife cusses out the Dr. (different Dr.). My wife is in pretty hard labor and was being quite vocal about the whole ordeal. The Dr. told her to be quiet as it shouldn't be that painful. My wife turned her head, looked at the Dr. and said..FK you, it's not hurting you. The look on the womans face (the Dr.) was absolutely precious.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I might post a trip report October 24, 2006. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
My daughter Rachel Michelle was born March 30th at 9:54 pm

[/ QUOTE ]

Your daughter and my son Benjamin Harold share a birthday. Let's arrange their marriage now. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

My wife had been dialated about 3cm for weeks. When the girl came she came quickly.

Doctor was out having coffee and it was time for the epidural. My wife's freaking out; nurses assured her doc would be back from break in plenty of time.

Doc strolls in. How much is she dialated? She's not 'dialated' at all, there's no cervix left; she's all the way gone. Doc administered epidural in a hurry.

Now we're working with a great delivery nurse. There's a problem: every contraction is causing baby's heart rate to slow. There's a problem with the cord, wrapped around baby or wedged somehow.

Everything is happening too fast for my wife's OBGYN to make it; so we get an 'oncall': burly, surly, bull dyke. No offense to OOT's bull dykes, if any.

I overhear her and the delivery nurse arguing in the corridor, delivery nurse is pushing for an emergency C-section.

Nurse: Heart is failing when baby tries to drop.
Doc: It's OK, don't worry about it.
Nurse: This baby's crashing! (I start to freak)
Doc: I'm the doctor, don't tell me my job.

So they call for the C-section; I get gowned and am told to wait outside the delivery room door. And I wait. And wait. And wonder what the [censored]'s going on. Finally a harried nurse opens the door and beckons me in; they'd forgotten about me.

The incision is made, and this burly doc pushes down as hard as she can on my wife's belly. *Squelch* out comes baby girl. Quietly. Wife is freaking: What's wrong with my baby?
I check out the cleaning table; the nurses are working on her and discussing what they'll have to eat during their upcoming break. I relax; if they're talking about that all must be good. Baby girl is just a quiet one.

I cut the cord, they don't offer up the placenta and it doesn't occur to me to want a bite.

Regarding bonding, it's hard to say. I didn't feel any kind of epiphany or anything; yet my daughter and I are very, very tight. I talked with her a lot when she was en utero so maybe I'd already bonded with her; I dunno.

We find out the sex of upcoming baby in about a month.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I might post a trip report October 24, 2006. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Dude, sweet! Oct. 20th here.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I hesitate because Im sure 2+2 doesnt want everyone to post their "shes so cute" pics, but this pic is part of the story:

Wife went through hell with all the the processes for IVF. It is a medical miracle, and when I took this picture, I couldnt believe that the tests, manipulations and clinical crap resulted in this little thing in a car seat in my car.

Could be an "Ask Me" thread if anyone wants to know about the whole IVF thing. Its a trip, man.

http://img216.imageshack.us/img216/5...ride3sp.th.jpg

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Middle of the night, probably 4AM. I woke up to my wife moaning incoherently and mumbling nonsense. I woke my mother-in-law who was also staying there and we hustled her over to the hospital, which was about a five minute drive. We bypassed the ER and took her straight up to Maternity. By this time she was pretty much out cold but they had her resting comfortably and the baby was being monitored.

Shortly after that I was watching the monitor and the fetal heart rate crashed from 140 or so to 30 in the space of less than a minute. The attending nurse caught it as well and all hell broke loose. The OB was behind the counter at the nurse's station and literally jumped over it to get to the room, barking "Get the anaesthesiologist - now!" They were swabbing my wife's belly with iodine as they wheeled her out of the room. Within the space of 5-10 minutes - minutes that lasted an eternity from the viewpoint of a very frightened first time father - they had the baby out and I was the proud, scared father of a healthy baby boy.

It turned out that the placenta had separated from the uterine wall. We were extremely fortunate that we were already in the hospital because if the placental abruption had happened at home it's fairly certain we would have lost the baby and there's a possibility I would have lost my wife as well. I'm just thankful it all worked out.

Second time around was a routine c-section. My wife didn't enjoy it very much but I had a grand time, no doubt due to the relief of it not being a life and death emergency.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Mine is 5 now and I remember pretty much everything about those days. The thing I find amazing is, he is pretty much the same kid as the one we brought home from the hospital. You wouldn't think babies have personalities, but they do, and they pretty much don't change.

Before he was born, he kicked and kicked, so much so my wife was on Darvocet the last two months. It was constant, like he would never sleep. We bring him home, he's asleep in the crib, and there goes the right leg. Kick, kick, kick. You feed him, there goes the right leg. Kicked his right big toenail off by the time he was 6 months old. We finally figured out he kicks when he's happy, and he kicks to this day if you read him a story or give him one of his favorite foods.

He's going to be the worst poker player in the world if anybody bothers to look under the table.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I wanna say that I enjoyed this thread a lot. One of my closest friends is having a baby in a month, so reading these stories is kinda cool.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Anyway my son's earliest memories are of a pirate chantey.

[/ QUOTE ]

[img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

The kid is gonna turn out fantastic!

I sometimes sing 'Farewell and Adieu' to my little girl at bedtime, till she tells me to shut up, at least.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]

All teenagers are pains. Good on you if you're taking care of your stepson and being a good father to him even if he's being a typical teenager. So many stepdads drop the ball so terribly.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes I keep saying that to his Mam, he isnt that bad mainly being rude and insensitive in particular to his mother. He has said to her recently that I am the only person he can trust so I must be doing ok althogh he might not think that now after I shouted at him last week as he was spoiling a family outing.

I went into a shell as a teen and drifted away from my family somthing I still havent really got back, so hopefully will be able to keep him onside and keep the relationships going.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

[ QUOTE ]

but did you survive the bubble and make the money or did you get blinded off??? I swear, some people have no idea what's important in a story.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think I just made the money and got my buy-in back [img]/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]

I remember thinking after we got there and we just sat around for 3 hours that I could have been at home winning the tourney. Obviously, this is not something I have ever told my wife.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

My wife's pregnancy happened under close supervision, for various reasons. Her OB and parinatologist decided it was time to induce about a week shy of the actual due date because the baby was obviously big enough and they didn't want her to go through unsupervised labor. So, we show up at the hospital at 11AM on a Tuesday, having already pre-registered. It was like checking into a hotel.

We spent the next 24 hours in the pre-labor room, and nothing happened. "Failure to progress", they call it. It was C-section time.

My wife started getting REALLY scared when they put the epidural in. By the time we were in the operating room, she had entered a zen state where she was just basically pretending none of this was happening. So she was pretty quiet.

While they're opening her up, they cauterize as they go, so as they performed the C-section there's an occasional burning smell. Other than that, not much was going on. At some point, the doctor says "OK, Daddy, stand up" and I look over the screen. I couldn't believe how small the incision was - I thought they basically split the woman open, but it's really only a ten-inch or so incision, and lower than I'd imagined. There was an absolutely incredible amount of fluid collected, and the doctor had his hands inside the incision. The next thing I know, he's holding a baby up in the air, still attached to my wife by the umbilical cord.

They bring my daughter over to a warming table and start cleaning her up. When a baby is born naturally, the squeezing that occurs forces the fluid out of the baby's lungs; in a C-section they have to suction it out. After they do, one of the nurses says "I'd sure like to get a good cry out of this baby", and I realize she's been gurgling, but not really screaming. About two seconds after that it was like my daughter woke up, and she was PISSED. The nurses immediately were like "Ok, we're done here" and moved on to the adjacent OR to work on their next victim. They bundled my daughter up, I brought her over to my wife (who was still basically catatonic), and off we went to the nursery.

After getting bathed and again expressing her anger at being removed from her home, they finaly bundled my little girl up and gave her to me. We were in the "overflow" nursery at Cedars, so I had a lot of privacy. My feelings at that moment are just like DB's - she seemed to know that I was going to take care of her, and I would've fought a thousand armies to protect her. My wife was in recovery for a really long time, four hours or so, so I spent all that time holding my baby and talking and singing to her in a rocking chair.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

I love this thread-(sorry for imposing on a father's thread)

I am a labor and delivery nurse and it is very cool to hear daddy's perspective. I have spent a lot of times with laboring moms and dads, and its very important to me to have my dads involved.
Some are very hands on-asking lots of questions, others are completely overwhelmed and need a bit more guidance, and I have had a few be completely indifferent.

Most of the time the docs are not there until we call them-I usually take a mom to crowning before I call a doctor(given the baby is tolerating labor)-this is not uncommon.

For those of you awaiting your first, people love to share the horror stories-most deliveries go without a hitch.
Be prepared, virtually all babies come out blue-not always crying vigarously-it can take time to transition, clear fluid from their lungs-sometimes we(nurses) have to give oxygen, deep suction the airway or resuscitate a baby.

As far as the nursing aspect of it-they should always be telling you what they are doing and why-also telling you what you can expect as labor progresses-what we are looking at on the monitors, why they are predictable changes in the baby's heart rate...etc.
Ask questions, even if you have taken the classes-its always a bit different when you are there.


Chip-if you and your wife are planning a repeat section-it will seem far less chaotic. You will still most likey have to wait for her to be prepped-trust me most women don't like having their spouse/sig other watch the prep.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

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We were extremely fortunate that we were already in the hospital because if the placental abruption had happened at home it's fairly certain we would have lost the baby and there's a possibility I would have lost my wife as well.

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After reading that, it took me a second to start breathing again.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

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Wife went through hell with all the the processes for IVF. It is a medical miracle, and when I took this picture, I couldnt believe that the tests, manipulations and clinical crap resulted in this little thing in a car seat in my car.

Could be an "Ask Me" thread if anyone wants to know about the whole IVF thing. Its a trip, man.


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I would very much like to see this 'Ask Me' thread.

To the rest of you, my jealousy runs deep. I would very much like to join the club.

The stories are wonderful. Amidst all the SIIHP, help me buy a watch, NSFW, and best 1994 indie song threads, OOT has another hidden gem.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

Ten days after my wife's due date, the doc decided to induce labour. She goes in to the hospital at 7am, and after 12 hours of labour produces insufficient dilation, they finally decide it's not happening and do the C-section. During that long, long, day, I sincerely wished that we'd never decided to have a child. It's not easy holding your wife's hand through such a long ordeal, seeing her in pain and feeling completely useless.

Once they took her to the theatre, I went through one of those out-of-body experiences. It was like I was looking down at this scene, I had no concept of what I was supposed to be feeling.

Half an hour or so later, I was the bewildered father of a healthy girl. For months after I could be heard saying that nothing that complicated should come without an instruction manual.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

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To the rest of you, my jealousy runs deep. I would very much like to join the club.


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-- dcasper70
I was aware of this, and I often think on it when I see you post - I remember you asking advice on it. I will be the happiest guy here (after you of course) when you finally come give us the good news [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Keep trying, man!

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

My oldest is 12 years old. My wife labored from 10PM all through teh night until 9AM the following morning without any painkillers. I watched the whole thing and cut teh umbilical cord (the scissors looked like the ones used to cut the ribbon at supermarket grand openings).

I can still remember it like it was yesterday. Thanks for letting me recall it.

One funny note. My second child had to be induced. Right as my wife is getting ready to push, we hear the women in the next delivery room over puking her guts out. So as my wife is trying to push, all you hear is the sounds of this woman's breakfast making a return visit.

Re: For fathers: remember when you first became a daddy?
 

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I don't know if many new fathers get something like this. I think each guy is probably completely different in how he reacts.

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I got these feelings also.

I have two children and I remember each birth very well. Overall, everything went great. There were nervous moments, but all was good.

I cried like a baby at each birth. I was completely overcome with all sorts of happy emotions. It absolutely blew my mind. I never in a million years saw those emotions coming. I was so proud of wife and happy to see our new baby. I couldn't think of the last time I cried before that. My oldest is almost three, and I still get teary eyed just thinking about it.