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ImprovinNewbie 11-14-2007 04:11 PM

Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
For those of you run home games with friends, relatives and or co-workers, what do you do when one of your players throws a fit after a hand?

i host a home game every Tuesday for mostly my co-workers and friends and one player (one of my bosses who plays actually) has thrown several temper tantrums in the last few weeks. he blows up, and berates other peoples plays, and just gets generally nasty. the problem may be solved because this week he proclaimed "im not coming next week or again. i hate playing with people who play like you" this is mostly fine with me (he got really angry this week after he slow played a nut str8 so far as to let me check into a backdoor flush and take a big portion on his stack) and he doesnt have to play but what should i do.

the situation is sensitive because he's my boss although i make more that him due to commission that i make, and he is very close to my age so the friend boss line is a little blurred. im really pretty lost. i dont want him to stop coming and for others to follow.

we only play .5/1 cash but everyone buys in for 200BB usually and we straddle adn double straddle sometimes so the game plays really big. for us a $200 losing night could be a little rough.

any suggestions?

pfapfap 11-14-2007 04:20 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Listen, folks, don't play with your professors or employers. Especially when you're in a position to be an authority figure over them.

Put aside the idea that he's your boss and at least think about how you would handle anybody else acting like this.

For me, if someone's constantly a jerk, s/he doesn't get invited back. I don't care how big of a donator someone is, Rule #1 is No A-Holes.

A couple of weeks ago we did have a bit of an argument between a few people at another table, so I took each of them outside individually and asked them what happened, trying to be supportive and in simple information-gathering mode so that I could figure out the situation and address it. Turns out one player was reacting to the play of his girlfriend, then defending his actions because in his mind she's not very good. So instead of folding like he wanted and like she was planning, she called with the best hand just to show she wasn't being told what to do, and it was a mess. So I told the offender that it's okay, I react sometimes too, but the important thing is to recognize an error, apologize for it, and move on. This player has caused some problems before and is a bit annoying, but not yet to A-Hole range. Regardless, he hasn't been back since, and while I did my best to make sure he felt welcome, I'm not mourning the loss.

Another time we had a player who I've known for years at a different game get a little too aggressive. I know him and so I don't always remember how he seems to others, but some of the players told me that they didn't like his attitude and didn't like how I was allowing him to charge around and be a jerk. Thankfully he had sense to stay away for a few weeks after a bit of a rage, and the next time he called to ask about the game I was forced into the awkward conversation. I told him that he was welcome if he was able to keep the anger under control, as it was making others uncomfortable. I told him that I knew him and I understood his demons, but that it wasn't the small group we play with in the other game and that I needed to look out for everyone's comfort. Thankfully for me he understood (and happened to be working on anger management at the time), and he's been generally okay in his sporadic visits.

So, er, not much advice, other than relate some stories of how I've dealt with touchy situations. In the end, it's your game, and you have to take charge of it. It's unfortunate that your boss has put you in this double-bind no-win situation.

scott1 11-14-2007 04:27 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...

we only play .5/1 cash but everyone buys in for 200BB usually and we straddle and double straddle sometimes so the game plays really big. for us a $200 losing night could be a little rough.

any suggestions?

[/ QUOTE ]

Sounds like stakes are too high for a work game. It's not worth creating animosity at work for a poker game.

tuq 11-14-2007 07:09 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Wow, this thread just makes me happy that I'm usually the biggest handful in our weekly donkament. Mostly everyone is just happy to be there and drink beer and some smoke P.O.T. Very chill.

One of the first times I went, when I was an outsider, I mixed it up with a regular because he was either very stoned or very drunk and was dealing a hand but sort of spacing out and taking forever to deal the streets while he had some rambling semi-coherent conversation with someone else. We ended up sniping at each other but ultimately worked through it and became mo'fos.

Then last week some knucklehead guest who was in town and knew the host and some others who plays B&M and online was pissing me off to no end. People were worshipping at his feet about how awesome he was at poker and he stupidly let it go to his head. He spouted things like how dumb it is to read poker books with some incredibly retarded logic to back that up and he took advantage of the friendly game vibe by only showing his cards at showdown if he won (he got everyone to show theirs first, I just didn't want to get involved). Even on the hand I busted him in a 3-way all-in he wouldn't flip his cards until I told him to and made a big stink about it and how he didn't have to do it, etc. So glad people like that aren't part of our regular group.

Small Fry 11-14-2007 07:47 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Take them outside and talk to them. Explain to them that everyone is there to enjoy themselves and have a good time. His attitude makes people uncomfortable. It's not easy but if you're the host the responsibilty probably falls to you. Is there somebody else in the game closer to the offender that might be able to intercede on your behalf?

It also depends on what they go off about. A player that berates others really needs to be stopped immediately. A player throwing a fit about their bad luck, always getting sucked out on, etc. is really just blowing off some steam. You might allow this guy a little lattitude but be watchful, as his tirade could easily spread to berating others and their play.

Good Luck

JJT 11-14-2007 08:40 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Confession: I've pretty much given up playing locally because I totally went ballistic at one player at a home game, after 2 previous days of donkish play at 2 different places. I should have been embarassed, but I wasn't, but I did decide that my BP wasn't worth the aggro. I miss it, but not that much.

zepthiir 11-14-2007 11:22 PM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
I have never understood getting angry at donkish players. They are your best source of income, granted they may suck out every now and then but if you are playing correctly their mistakes will pay you off more often than not.

ImprovinNewbie 11-15-2007 01:57 AM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
unfortunatly this guy is one of my bosses but if it gets more crazy i'll as both of our boss (who plays too) to say something. he goes off at people about their play and its definitly out of line.

the hand that set him off this time is...

one caller and he is in the Sb, im in the BB. i check with J9 suited and the flop is T96 one of my suite. every one checks and on the turn a blank of my suite comes. i bet thinking i might be good (about half the pot) and get called by my boss in the SB. the river flushes for me and he bets... i raise about 4.5 times his PSB. he freaks and calls yelling about how i lucked into the flush but he has to call.... he flips 87 for a flopped st8 and yells and curses at me for a solid 5 minutes about how i had no business in the hand in the first place... he butchered the recollection of the hand and really weirded everyone out with his tirade....

pretty uncomfortable and kind of a lose lose situation.....

zepthiir 11-15-2007 02:29 AM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Yeah that sucks, and of course there is no telling him that you checked and saw the hand free whereas he actually completed the blind with 87 and had even less business being in the hand than you did.

And what the hell is he doing checking with a flopped set?!

But if he is consistantly angry like this then at the end of the day it is probably best not inviting him to the game, you have to decide which will put more strain on the boss/employee relationship. Not inviting him, or inviting him and having him angry at you for cleaning him out.

pfapfap 11-15-2007 04:46 AM

Re: Players in Your Game Getting Angry...
Yeah, I dunno, outside of someone outright robbing me, I can't imagine anything making me blood-boiling upset at a game. I'll get a little frustrated at slow drunken play, but that's about it.

The OP is a warning to play only money you can afford to lose. If the stakes matter enough to cause you anguish, you're not playing your best game and are setting yourself up for failure.

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