TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

So I'm driving home from my work as an undercover alba manwhore or whatever today, pissed off that I got pwned in that thread cuz I had to leave to go home, and I head to the bookstore to pick up some books. I'm getting David Sedaris "Naked" and Jose Saramago "The Gospel According to Jesus Christ," both well-recommended fictions and by authors I like. So I walk straight in, get the books, walk directly to the front, register girl calls me over. She's tried this business in the past to no avail.

Register girl is like 5'2", fairly cute with reddish hair. But she's not a day over 18 if that (making me at least 7 years her senior), she has giant blue emo glasses and is wearing a WWJD bracelet. Three strikes bizzatch. She starts in:

her: "Wow you were quick, I saw you come in, you just went right over there huh? You must know what you like"

me: Yeah, I'm in kind of a hurry tonight

her: "So do you have a member card? (I say no) You doooon't? Well how bout filling one out? If nothing else you'll have a little more time to spend here with me..."

me: I don't think so, thanks though

her: "okay... your total is blah blah (gives me change, etc) ... I'm gonna put your receipt in 'naked', ooh... I hope you're trying to tell me something buying this"

me: *laughs, smiles* hey what are you doing later? why don't I get your number and we can meet up?

her: "sounds great!!" *giggles, smiles, scribbles number on paper, gives it to me*

me: great, thanks

I then proceed to spit out the gum I was chewing into the paper she just gave me, crumple it up, and hand it back to her, and say "now how about throwing that out for me?"

her: (stands there staring at me like i just punched a baby)

me: I'm pretty sure it's what jesus would do. (i then toss it towards her, she fumbles around and catches it, i walk out)

i am the harsher of mellows

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

why not just hit it and quit it

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

because this is funnier dammit

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

yeah... i got a girlfriend already though, and i don't [censored] with the jesus people

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is what my last fortune cookie said.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

I cry LIES

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

if this is true its very mean and op is an [censored].

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

send her to me

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
5'2", fairly cute

[/ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ]
'naked', ooh... I hope you're trying to tell me something buying this"

[/ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ]
scribbles number on paper, gives it to me

[/ QUOTE ]
Then you diss her? I call bull [censored].

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

i believed it up until he said the books cost blah blah thats not even numbers

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

7 years younger than me, jesus freak, i have a girlfriend... ya i diss her

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is what my last fortune cookie said.

[/ QUOTE ]

my last fortune cookie said "maybe on next century you will live in moon" (no grammatical editing on my part)

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
i got a girlfriend already though

[/ QUOTE ]
pics or it didn't happen

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is what my last fortune cookie said.

[/ QUOTE ]

my last fortune cookie said "maybe on next century you will live in moon" (no grammatical editing on my part)

[/ QUOTE ]

Awesome. You are destined to live another 100 years!

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
i got a girlfriend already though

[/ QUOTE ]
pics or it didn't happen

[/ QUOTE ]

where've you been for the last 3.5 years? i've been with her longer than i've been regged on 2p2 ffs lol

but no pics, sry broseph

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
7 years younger than me, jesus freak, i have a girlfriend... ya i diss her

[/ QUOTE ]
7yrs younger is +EV, Jesus freak emphasize the word freak, and since you have a gf you could probably use some of the strange ldo.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

I don't care if it's true or not, that was awesome.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

Custom title for BMWGuy525 plz.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

awesome.

.. will be less awesome if it turns out your actually the emo bookstore girl

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

also that was pretty pathetic that you felt the need to make someone feel horrible like that. she just had a crush on you, and you acted like a tool so you could come brag on the internet how you turn away pussy.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

this is fake ldo but good story nonetheless

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

Custom title for bmwguy525 plz.

[/ QUOTE ]

FMP.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

Custom title for BMWGuy525 plz.

[/ QUOTE ]
http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b1...lsAllowsIt.jpg

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

good story, but didn't happen.

i find the jesus freaks are awesome in bed.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This was great.

mbillie, you could have just taken her number and made her day.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

so harsh

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

If you really did this - which I hope to god you did not - you're a complete and utter douchebag.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This was great.

mbillie, you could have just taken her number and [censored] her silly

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

also that was pretty pathetic that you felt the need to make someone feel horrible like that. she just had a crush on you, and you acted like a tool so you could come brag on the internet how you turn away pussy.

[/ QUOTE ]
I would have agreed here however she was wearing a WWJD..

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

Custom title for BMWGuy525 plz.

[/ QUOTE ]

great quote there bmwguy, qft

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

WWJD= Who would jesus do

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
good story, but didn't happen.

[/ QUOTE ]

fair enough [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

On second thought, maybe it is too harsh. You just ruined someone's day and maybe even her whole week. Still funny.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
On second thought, maybe it is too harsh. You just ruined someone's day and maybe even her whole week. Still funny.

[/ QUOTE ]

this was my thought as well

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

also that was pretty pathetic that you felt the need to make someone feel horrible like that. she just had a crush on you, and you acted like a tool so you could come brag on the internet how you turn away pussy.

[/ QUOTE ]

w/e, her jesus freak ass woulda done the same thing if she knew i was a hopeless godless sinner so i don't really care. maybe she'll forsake her religion and go on to have a meaningful life [img]/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img]

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

would have been funnier if you brough her home, sexed her, got her number and then spit gum in it, etc.

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]

w/e, her jesus freak ass woulda done the same thing if she knew i was a hopeless godless sinner so i don't really care. maybe she'll forsake her religion and go on to have a meaningful life

[/ QUOTE ]
u mean like yours

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

also that was pretty pathetic that you felt the need to make someone feel horrible like that. she just had a crush on you, and you acted like a tool so you could come brag on the internet how you turn away pussy.

[/ QUOTE ]
I would have agreed here however she was wearing a WWJD..

[/ QUOTE ]

this is a man who is seeing The Entire Picture

Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely
 

The problem with that play is that she might not even get it.