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-   -   Being Assertive (http://archives1.twoplustwo.com/showthread.php?t=559010)

ImsaKidd 12-01-2007 11:40 PM

Being Assertive
 
I've been noticing lately that a lot of my friends are really passive in most situations. This sort of thing really irritates me, as I have always been the sort of person to stand up to get what I want, not sit back and complain, without doing anything to change the situation.

Just wondering if anyone else has situations where being assertive has paid off? A few examples of mine:

1: Getting fair compensation when things go awry with a product/company. My family traveled to Salt Lake City to ski a few years back over Easter. Airports were crowded and we voluntarily took 3 bumps to later flights, netting about $2k in airline vouchers each. Additionally, we negotiated with the airline attendants to get a ton of food vouchers for the airport. Not really a huge deal, just mentioned that we were hungry, and they instantly gave us the vouchers.

2: Challenging professors on grades. I feel like professors will go easy on me just to get me out of their hair. On the first paper or larger assignment, I will have them review my work before turning it in. I think this gives them the impression I am an overachiever (even if I am not), and leads to way easier grading.

3: What actually sparked this post, although somewhat trivial. I went to dinner tonight with a few friends, and the service was pretty terrible. Our drinks sat empty for a while, with them complaining about the service. I suggested they get a refill at the bar, which they thought was a terrible idea because "a bartender doesn't give a [censored] about your free refill". I went up and got a fresh drink in about 30 seconds.

I love getting better service/free stuff just because I ask (politely), and i'm sure the rest of you have ideas I have never thought of, so any input is appreciated.

Howard Treesong 12-02-2007 12:33 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
I randomly asked for extra mashed potatos at a fast-food restaurant many years ago. I got some, too, so that was pretty sweet.

HiBaCHi 12-02-2007 12:37 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
i think a better thread would be common, realistic situations where it's more beneficial to be passive :P

but <3 imsa

lennytheduck 12-02-2007 12:46 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
I think you are spot on here in your general philosophy and in the examples you gave.

Except for the grading one. I always hated when people did that crap.

stinkypete 12-02-2007 12:51 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
[ QUOTE ]

2: Challenging professors on grades.

[/ QUOTE ]

i just wish they'd take the time to grade [censored] properly in the first place when i pay $18k/semester to take their stupid classes.

SlowHabit 12-02-2007 01:11 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
a. "I want a BJ right now."

b. Long time ago, I wanted to touch breasts. Girl obviously pushed me away but I kept being assertive. When I finally touched them, she kept on letting me.

c. "Bend over."

Jason Strasser (strassa2) 12-02-2007 03:08 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
I really hate people that did #2 a lot.

Ship Ship McGipp 12-02-2007 03:11 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
SlowHabit,

That is rape.

Imsa,

I hate people that challenge grades, I hate people that care about grades, I hate people who have parents that care too much about grades, I hate people who put stock into other people's good grades, and I hate people who think that complaining about grades is an example of being assertive. Your examples suck, a good example would be striking up a conversation with someone that you don't know, for instance.

Your thread should be titled: "When To Complain, By someone who Gets Bitched at Himself a Lot."

ImsaKidd 12-02-2007 03:13 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
If a professor is going to change a grade because I went in and talked to them, doesn't that mean they weren't really dead-set on the grade they initially gave?

EDIT: To clarify, the times I go to professors/TAs the most is with papers, and almost always before. I get suggestions, make the changes, and usually do very well on that assignment. I think I only took a paper in after grading maybe twice.

Ship Ship McGipp 12-02-2007 03:17 AM

Re: Being Assertive
 
[ QUOTE ]
If a professor is going to change a grade because I went in and talked to them, doesn't that mean they weren't really dead-set on the grade they initially gave?

EDIT: To clarify, the times I go to professors/TAs the most is with papers, and almost always before. I get suggestions, make the changes, and usually do very well on that assignment. I think I only took a paper in after grading maybe twice.

[/ QUOTE ]

No, it means "I don't give a fk about this kid, and if he wants a B+ instead of a B it will be worth it to save the next 15 minutes of my life listening to what he has to say."


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