Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

I met a girl while traveling in August of 2006. We started to talk online a lot and became "boyfriend/girlfriend" within a month and started visiting each other back and forth. The plan all alone was for her to move from her hometown of Chicago to NYC to live with me. She did so 3 months ago and things have been pretty good. We got an apartment and a cat together and she got a pretty good job making quite a bit more money than she was making before.

The only real problem is that she hasn't had any luck making friends. She had a couple of people in mind that she could hang out with here but 2 of them ended up moving unexpectedly and one just sucks ( stole something from her ). She's tried pretty hard to meet people at work but hasn't had much luck. I told her she should randomly message some people off of Myspace who are into the same music and stuff she is, which she was totally against, but she tried it and that didn't yield anything.

I know from my personal experience, making good friends can definitely be hard and it's probably easier for guys. I mean I've lived in NYC for around 3 years and probably only have 5-7 friends that I think I'll stay in touch with 10 years from now.

Anyway does anyone have any experience with this? I'll admit I didn't really fully comprehend how hard it is to make friends and how important that is to girls at first so I didn't do much to help her. I was thinking that just going out to clubs/bars with her would probably help, but I thought someone might have some better advice.

Thanks

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

Join an archery club or yoga or calisthenics or whatever it is girls do.

Also, pics?

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

Have her find a hobby or something that she can get into where she can meet other people. Be it rock climbing or tennis or a book club or yoga or whatever the [censored] she is interested in.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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Have her find a hobby or something that she can get into where she can meet other people. Be it rock climbing or tennis or a book club or yoga or whatever the [censored] she is interested in.

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Good point, she said she was going to start taking dance classes again when she moved here, I should try and get her to do that.

No pics, but she's really good looking. She has met like 3 or 4 dudes who she thought seemed nice and would want to be her friend, but all of them ended up making inappropriate comments to her pretty quickly so she stopped talking to them. So that's been bumming her out pretty hard too.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She has met like 3 or 4 dudes who she thought seemed nice and would want to be her friend, but all of them ended up making inappropriate comments to her pretty quickly so she stopped talking to them. So that's been bumming her out pretty hard too.

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lol, I love how dumb girls can be.

Sounds like you need to give her the "no guy ever wants to be your friend" speech.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She has met like 3 or 4 dudes who she thought seemed nice and would want to be her friend, but all of them ended up making inappropriate comments to her pretty quickly so she stopped talking to them. So that's been bumming her out pretty hard too.

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lol, I love how dumb girls can be.

Sounds like you need to give her the "no guy ever wants to be your friend" speech.

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Haha yeah. It surprised her because she's always had a lot of close male friends, most of whom she's known for a long time and who never put the moves on her. So I guess she thought she could cheat nature. But to most dudes "I have a boyfriend" means "I have a boyfriend I want to cheat on".

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She has met like 3 or 4 dudes who she thought seemed nice and would want to be her friend, but all of them ended up making inappropriate comments to her pretty quickly so she stopped talking to them. So that's been bumming her out pretty hard too.

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lol. New thread title, "Helping girlfriend make girl friends. HELP!"

She wasn't really bummed out that men want to f her and not be her friend was she?

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She has met like 3 or 4 dudes who she thought seemed nice and would want to be her friend, but all of them ended up making inappropriate comments to her pretty quickly so she stopped talking to them. So that's been bumming her out pretty hard too.

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lol. New thread title, "Helping girlfriend make girl friends. HELP!"

She wasn't really bummed out that men want to f her and not be her friend was she?

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Well she was bummed out that in some of the instances she thought she had met someone other than me she could hang out with and then they made it clear they were trying to bang her despite that she had mentioned pretty early on that she had a boyfriend she lived with.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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I told her she should randomly message some people off of Myspace who are into the same music and stuff

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ell oh ell

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She wasn't really bummed out that men want to f her and not be her friend was she?

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I've got a lot of chick friends, and I can't even begin to count how many times after some guy they thought just wanted to be their friend tried to nail them, that I've had to explain to them that guys already have friends, they don't want to make new friends with some girl. If they are showing any interest in you its because they want to [censored] you.

Which every single time is always followed by

her: "that's not true, we are just friends and you are a guy"
me: "we've already [censored]"
her: frowning "oh yeah"

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

lollllll [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] alobar

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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She wasn't really bummed out that men want to f her and not be her friend was she?

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I've got a lot of chick friends, and I can't even begin to count how many times after some guy they thought just wanted to be their friend tried to nail them, that I've had to explain to them that guys already have friends, they don't want to make new friends with some girl. If they are showing any interest in you its because they want to [censored] you.

Which every single time is always followed by

her: "that's not true, we are just friends and you are a guy"
me: "we've already [censored]"
her: frowning "oh yeah"

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Haha yeah. I think the biggest dissapointment for her has been that the people she works with at a department store haven't been very friendly to her. Like she's made some friends, but the people that she was actually into in terms of being friends have kind of blown her off, while the people that she didn't like at all have wanted to hang out with her.

Luckily I should be way less busy over the winter and will hopefully be able to go out more with her and help her try to meet people. Because she said that if she doesn't make friends within the next 10 or so months of our lease, she doesn't want to live in NYC anymore, and I really don't know if I can leave New York.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

dan,

i live in NYC. PM me pics of your gf and i will let you know if she looks cool enough to hang out with my hip crowd.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

is your gf ugly, good looking people don't/shouldn't have trouble making friends

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

Shame you don't live in Chi town, cause my situation is the opposite yours. My fiance moved from NY to Chicago where we are living. She is also having trouble making friends, since all her coworkers are 20+ years older than her. Thought I'd let you know, not that it helps [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

Is that your fiance in your avatar? If so, we should all hang out [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img].

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

I will be her friend. Where does she live?

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

Swinging ftw

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

I know a girl who has a met few good friends on craigslist, theres like a friends section in the personals.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

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I know a girl who has a met few good friends on craigslist, theres like a friends section in the personals.

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I've met a lot of cool people off of CL. There's definitely some weirdos out there and you can usually spot them after an email or two. I would think things would be less wierd for a chick looking for chick friends.

Re: Helping girlfriend make friends. HELP!
 

get another cat