I panic when playing live!
 

I'm a long-term online winner, and I am finally attempting to make the transition into live play.

However, a big problem I have is that I have always been very uncomfortable interacting with people who I don't know. In particular, groups of people and even moreso, having to talk, interact and confront groups of people that I do not know

Now, I know most people aren't particularly comfortable with such scenarios, but I'm pretty bad. My heart starts racing, I clam up, and I find it difficult to speak or think properly. In a sense, I suffer from a mild social-phobia which can produce panic attacks in extreme situations.

Of course, this is a trait that really doesn't bode well for playing live poker. I have only played live once and I found the situation deeply uncomfortable. When involved in a hand, I'm spending too much energy being nervous, and not thinking clearly. Moreover, the nervousness is exacerbated when bluffing, or in difficult situations, and my pulse alone may be a major tell. After the live session I was exhausted, had a stress headache, and found it difficult to play for more than a couple of hours.

So obviously I need to sort this problem out. Here are some things I thought of already:

1) Getting used to the environment. I'm pretty sure that with time, things will get easier.
2) Try to regulate breathing & heart rate. Even when playing online I find myself getting excited when involved in a big pot/bluff. Therefore I should be able to practice this on a daily basis.

The normal, clinical way of approaching this type of problem is through exposure, cbt or drugs. I can't be bothered with cbt, and I can't get hold of beta-blockers. Therefore, I guess I need methods to just "get used to it", and get confident playing live, ASAP.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Things definitely will get easier with time and experience. The more you're in the cardroom, the more it will feel like a second home to you, and ultimately you will welcome seeing new faces at the table.

Here's another thing to try the next time you play live: don't walk into the casino and head directly into the cardroom for a game. Give yourself a little time to acclimate, so to speak. In other words, since you're probably already nervous when entering the casino just from thinking about how nervous you'll be at the table, take a few minutes to walk around, get something to drink or eat, grab a magazine to read for a bit, and when you feel comfortable, then get in the game. There's no reason to throw yourself in a situation that's anxiety inducing, so just relax and take your time; the game will always be there.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Now that's the solid kind of advice I was looking for, thanks.

I'm thinking that doing something "similar but smaller", such as playing BJ for a while might be a good plan.

I'm also considering drinking as a solution -- I have high tolerance, can think clearly, but it does give me confidence and it is the most usual route to solve this problem....

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

I can’t see how anyone can seriously condone taking drugs or drink as the solution. However, if by drink you mean one maybe two then that would be ok. I myself get a little more relaxed with that and it will not impair your judgement.

As you said, simple exposure will gradually help. Do you not have a friend that will go along to the casino for a night out even just as a little moral support. This may make you a little less stressed.

Also like Lucere said, just take your time. Indeed even go there with no pressure to play at all. That way you may not get stressed thinking you have to play. Once there, you may start to get the itch to play without the associated stress.

Just try to chill with some deep breathing exercises as well.

Good luck

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

I wouldn't drink at all. People think of alcohol only as a sedative. While this is technically true, these effects are typically only seen on the descending limb of the blood alcohol curve (that is, when your body is getting rid of the alcohol, when the buzz is wearing off, etc.). On the ascending limb (when you're actively drinking and your blood alcohol level is going up), alcohol can have stimulant like effects. While this can include some improved cognitive performance up to a couple drinks, it could also make you a little edgier than you already are. And considering this is the whole problem in the first place, I would just stay away from alcohol.

And I'm not sure how the blackjack plan would work, but I think you'd be better off skipping that and just getting comfortable in the poker room, which is really where you want to be anyway. You might spend time getting comfortable at the BJ tables only to find yourself still nervous by the time you get to the poker room (which is inherently a different environment).

Hope that helps.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

I'm thinking that doing something "similar but smaller", such as playing BJ for a while might be a good plan... considering drinking as a solution

Please post where you play. We'll all show up to support you [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]. The alcohol is a bad idea, but you might use it as a crutch to help you acclimate for a few session or two. I'd play a short timed session in this case. Just play to warm up to the setting and build some comfort and familiarity.

I sometimes used to throw up before playing Blackjack, so I'm unable to see it as a less stressful situation. Additionally, you bet every hand and always do so before seeing your cards. You are also subject to criticism by other players who believe your play has caused them to lose.

I used to use play video poker to help me get used to a new casino, but now, I'm happier reading a magazine in the cardroom.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

-Wear an ipod
-Don't even bother to look at your opponents. Just tell the dealer your action
-Play stakes that are smaller than what you are used to until you get more comfortable

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Yeah it was pretty ironic that in my first session I was panicky, despite the fact that I was playing 50 times lower than I normally do!!!!

WRT the alcohol, iv'e been drinking for many years (probably too much) and I honestly understand my own tolerances and reactions to it very well. I'm not really worried about playing bad or acting drunk. My main hesitation with drinking while playing is that I don't want to get into bad habits while working.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Try this book: http://www.amazon.ca/Zen-Art-Poker-Larry...9970&sr=1-1

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

this i think is a stupid reply, but it may work

if you do have a so called social phobia, and really want to get rid of it, then you could try putting yourself in akward real world situations where you have to talk and confront people, like sitting on a bus and force yourself to talk to the person next to you, or just approach people to ask them something or engage in conversation.

this would really work, but i know it is very hard to do and put yourself up to, but after the first few times youve done it you will stop feeling embarrases by it.

its just like when you see those men who get all the girls just going up to girls. they have been rejected many times before, but they got used to it and thought nothing more of it after a while.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

You might need some prescription medicine, prescribed from a doctor. Have you ever had anything presribed to you for your social anxiety? Xanax?
Sounds like you're having panic attacks.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Do you have a friend who plays poker ( a live and online regular for example ) as well?
Why don't you go with him. I think that having a friend when playing live is very helpful for you. It kills time and you you won't feel as a total stranger at the table.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Dress and act like a less expensive version of Chris Furguson (big hat, dark glasses, and don't talk). He developed all that stuff originally to avoid giving off tells in live games. If people ask for a chip count, just move your hands and let the dealer count it. Make sure to stack it so it is easy to count, or you might have to move the stacks so the dealer can count it.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

[ QUOTE ]
-Wear an ipod
-Don't even bother to look at your opponents. Just tell the dealer your action
-Play stakes that are smaller than what you are used to until you get more comfortable

[/ QUOTE ]

This is good advice usually, but I don;t think it will help OP overcome his antisocial worries. If he want's to get to know how to interact with the table more without getting stressed out being the sterotypical iPod kid won't help.

One question for the OP (as I was in teh same boat) why not go with your mates? Even if they aren't poker fans give them £20 to sit down at the table with and give them a quick outline of the hands lol and you should be able to loosen up and have a laugh too then!

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Beta Blockers. i use them in social situations...very very very helpful

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Drink a few beers.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

Repetition: The more you do it the more comfortable you become with it. I was a wreck the first few times I played live in a room last year. You get over it. Even now when I take shots a limit I have never played before it is a lot easier.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

[ QUOTE ]
Beta Blockers. i use them in social situations...very very very helpful

[/ QUOTE ]

Seriously??

TBH I didn't even know what they were, so I googled them. Some sort of medicine that blocks adrenaline receptors? Crazy.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

I am a semi pro trumpet player, and fighting panic in front of a big audience, breathe control and concentration is a big issue for a trumpet player.

You have to "learn" how to deal with such situations. But you can only learn, when you feel positive. So if you sit down and play and you are stressed, paniced etc... then you learn to be stressed and in panic and that is wrong.

So just go out to the casino and watch the game. Take a friend with you and sit and the bar, observe the other people. You shouldnt be uncomfortable. On your next visit, you can try to chat with some people - bartenders in general wont refuse to do some smalltalk with you. Feeling a little uncomfortable is ok, but when you start to panic, leave immediately. On later visits, you can try to sit down on the table. But poker is absolute secondary now. Just buy in for the minimum and dont try to focus on poker. Focus on you neighbours, perhaps there is a little social interaction at the table, try to participate. When you feel extremely uncomfortable, leave again. And stay when you feel that you gain confidence. Its a process and it will take some time.

And there exist breathe control exercises. A good one is to think of something positive, slowly inhale for 4 seconds, hold breathe for 4 seconds, breathe-out for 4 seconds and hold again for 4. Do this for a minute. Then breathe normally for a minute and do it again. If you can do it easily, you can extend the time to 6 seconds each. (I can do it with 10 seconds when i am fully relaxed) Now if you pracitice this twice a day for some weeks you will be able to recall it and doing it without thinking about how to breathe, so you can do it at the table and still watch the game. And panic is impossible when breathing this slow.

If you decide to follow my advice, let us know if it helped you. I gave same or similar advice to fellow musicians suffering stage fright, but never to a poker player...

And drugs are bad. Dont use medication for mental issues, never.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

[ QUOTE ]
I am a semi pro trumpet player, and fighting panic in front of a big audience, breathe control and concentration is a big issue for a trumpet player.

You have to "learn" how to deal with such situations. But you can only learn, when you feel positive. So if you sit down and play and you are stressed, paniced etc... then you learn to be stressed and in panic and that is wrong.

So just go out to the casino and watch the game. Take a friend with you and sit and the bar, observe the other people. You shouldnt be uncomfortable. On your next visit, you can try to chat with some people - bartenders in general wont refuse to do some smalltalk with you. Feeling a little uncomfortable is ok, but when you start to panic, leave immediately. On later visits, you can try to sit down on the table. But poker is absolute secondary now. Just buy in for the minimum and dont try to focus on poker. Focus on you neighbours, perhaps there is a little social interaction at the table, try to participate. When you feel extremely uncomfortable, leave again. And stay when you feel that you gain confidence. Its a process and it will take some time.

And there exist breathe control exercises. A good one is to think of something positive, slowly inhale for 4 seconds, hold breathe for 4 seconds, breathe-out for 4 seconds and hold again for 4. Do this for a minute. Then breathe normally for a minute and do it again. If you can do it easily, you can extend the time to 6 seconds each. (I can do it with 10 seconds when i am fully relaxed) Now if you pracitice this twice a day for some weeks you will be able to recall it and doing it without thinking about how to breathe, so you can do it at the table and still watch the game. And panic is impossible when breathing this slow.

If you decide to follow my advice, let us know if it helped you. I gave same or similar advice to fellow musicians suffering stage fright, but never to a poker player...

And drugs are bad. Dont use medication for mental issues, never.

[/ QUOTE ]

Great post, one of the most helpful I've seen. You need to manage your panic attacks and it will be a slow process and I hope you get there. Don't mask the problem with drugs

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

This is a pretty gd thread.

I like to drink aswell because i suffer the same symptoms.

The drink doesnt kick in fast enough for me and i see the previous posters point about it actually making u more nervous for a while.

I wish i could offer better advice but i think its all pretty much covered.

I was wondering though about beta blockers.

Is there dependance/ side effects/ anything else bad.

I know generally u should be able to sort out ure own mental problems mentally, but i find it extremely difficult, exhausting even sickening.

I think a drug could be just the thing to start me on a new cycle.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

[ QUOTE ]
This is a pretty gd thread.

I like to drink aswell because i suffer the same symptoms.

The drink doesnt kick in fast enough for me and i see the previous posters point about it actually making u more nervous for a while.

I wish i could offer better advice but i think its all pretty much covered.

I was wondering though about beta blockers.

Is there dependance/ side effects/ anything else bad.

I know generally u should be able to sort out ure own mental problems mentally, but i find it extremely difficult, exhausting even sickening.

I think a drug could be just the thing to start me on a new cycle.

[/ QUOTE ]

Sorry, but I can't believe you are asking on this forum for such advice. If you want proper medical advice on drug side effects go see a doctor.

Re: I panic when playing live!
 

I haven't read all of the replies, but I can tell you what worked for me.

I just played A LOT! If I felt nervous about a big play, I just tried to step back and think objectively. If I could not do that, I would have ONE beer and ONE only (something I like and that I am used to: a local IPA) and fold a few hands unless it was AQ+, TT+. Once I did that and got my head back, my game came back like riding the bike as a kid. The biggest anxiety that I get once in a while is when someone stares me down. That's okay, it's part of the deal. I've come up with lots of things to do for that too. But I'll leave you to your imagination.
Once you get used to people doing that, you can start screwing with people. That's when I know I'm home.