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- - my finest moment, suck it $1.20 donkaments (http://archives1.twoplustwo.com/showthread.php?t=470313)

my finest moment, suck it $1.20 donkaments

to celebrate the 8 hour anniversary of me getting my chat back i decided to push every hand in a $1.20 sng under the guise of being a directv representative. for editing purposes i'll only include hands i won and my eventual bustout hand.

Dealt to ifoundnemo23 [5h 9h]
arkgal: calls 20
DEVILL22: folds
jcaz6: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "not only do you get $50 but your friend does as well!"
DuncanSavvy: raises 20 to 40
(RUN OUT MY TIME BANK)
ifoundnemo23 said, "as poker players i'm sure you can all appreciate what $50 can do for you"
ifoundnemo23 said, "directv also comes with the most premium channels there is to offer"
ifoundnemo23 said, "our sunday nfl ticket package is unmatched and with the nfl season approaching, is a must for any football fan"
DuncanSavvy said, "WTF!"
ifoundnemo23 said, "we offer hbo, showtime and cinemax"
ifoundnemo23 said, "as well as other movie channels"
TITANRICK said, "**** off"
ifoundnemo23 said, "certainly the best in variety"
ifoundnemo23: raises 1459 to 1499
aitonsaregay: folds
maggimae2: folds
Kizzy 12: folds
TITANRICK: folds
arkgal: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "send us your dish network reciever and we'll send you $200"
DuncanSavvy: raises 1 to 1500 and is all-in
ifoundnemo23: calls 1 and is all-in
*** FLOP *** [9s 3s 8s]
*** TURN *** [9s 3s 8s] [Ts]
*** RIVER *** [9s 3s 8s Ts] [Kh]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
DuncanSavvy: shows [Ad Qd] (high card Ace)
ifoundnemo23: shows [5h 9h] (a pair of Nines)
ifoundnemo23 collected 3050 from pot
ifoundnemo23 said, "thank you for playing, duncan"

Dealt to ifoundnemo23 [Qd Kc]
DEVILL22: raises 20 to 40
jcaz6: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "so can i interest any of you in joining the nation's largest cable company?"
ifoundnemo23: raises 1460 to 1500
aitonsaregay: folds
maggimae2: folds
Kizzy 12: folds
TITANRICK: folds
arkgal: folds
DEVILL22: calls 1460 and is all-in
ifoundnemo23 said, "you really do have nothing to lose"
*** FLOP *** [2s 2d 2h]
*** TURN *** [2s 2d 2h] [9h]
*** RIVER *** [2s 2d 2h 9h] [Ah]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
DEVILL22: shows [Kd Ts] (three of a kind, Deuces)
ifoundnemo23: shows [Qd Kc] (three of a kind, Deuces)
DEVILL22 collected 1515 from pot
ifoundnemo23 collected 1515 from pot

ifoundnemo23 said, "just about anything you could want to watch"
TITANRICK said, "you are desperate aren't you"

Dealt to ifoundnemo23 [Kh 4c]
aitonsaregay: folds
maggimae2: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "desperate for value"
Kizzy 12: folds
TITANRICK: calls 20
arkgal: folds
DEVILL22: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "and desperate to get others to see this value and use it"
jcaz6: calls 10
ifoundnemo23: raises 1480 to 1500
TITANRICK: calls 1450 and is all-in
jcaz6: folds
*** FLOP *** [7d Kc 5h]
*** TURN *** [7d Kc 5h] [3d]
*** RIVER *** [7d Kc 5h 3d] [2d]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
ifoundnemo23: shows [Kh 4c] (a pair of Kings)
TITANRICK: shows [Jh Js] (a pair of Jacks)
ifoundnemo23 said, "thank you for playing TITANRICK"
ifoundnemo23 collected 2960 from pot

Dealt to ifoundnemo23 [8d 7s]
maggimae2: folds
ifoundnemo23 said, "i hope you use directv in the future"
Kizzy 12: calls 20
arkgal: calls 20
DEVILL22: folds
jcaz6: folds
ifoundnemo23: raises 2980 to 3000
aitonsaregay: folds
Kizzy 12: calls 1470 and is all-in
arkgal: folds
*** FLOP *** [2s 3s 9s]
*** TURN *** [2s 3s 9s] [6s]
*** RIVER *** [2s 3s 9s 6s] [9d]
ifoundnemo23 said, "thank you for playing kizzy 12"
*** SHOW DOWN ***
ifoundnemo23: shows [8d 7s] (a flush, Nine high)
Kizzy 12: shows [4d 4c] (two pair, Nines and Fours)
ifoundnemo23 collected 3020 from pot
Kizzy 12 said, "**** you"
ifoundnemo23 said, "please consider directv for your cable needs"
ifoundnemo23 said, "arkgal, what digital provider are you currently using?"
arkgal said, "comcast"
ifoundnemo23 said, "well i can certainly change your mind with directv"
arkgal said, "i will never do business with them after this, and i am filing a formal complaint"

Dealt to ifoundnemo23 [5c Ts]
ifoundnemo23 said, "jcaz6, are you a directv user?"
chekemchez: calls 20
ifoundnemo23 said, "if so i can offer you savings of up to $25 a month"
ifoundnemo23: raises 2980 to 3000
aitonsaregay: folds
maggimae2: folds
arkgal: folds
DEVILL22: calls 1455 and is all-in
jcaz6: folds
chekemchez: folds
*** FLOP *** [Td Jh 5d]
*** TURN *** [Td Jh 5d] [6d]
*** RIVER *** [Td Jh 5d 6d] [2h]
ifoundnemo23 said, "thank you for playing DEVILL22"
*** SHOW DOWN ***
DEVILL22: shows [Qd Js] (a pair of Jacks)
ifoundnemo23: shows [5c Ts] (two pair, Tens and Fives)
ifoundnemo23 collected 2970 from pot

chekemchez: shows [5d 5h] (a pair of Fives)
ifoundnemo23: shows [6h Kd] (high card Ace)
chekemchez collected 4320 from pot
ifoundnemo23 said, "nice hand sir"
ifoundnemo23 said, "comcast cable wouldn't stack off like that"

(THEN THE BUSTOUT)
ifoundnemo23: shows [Jc Kh] (a pair of Sixes)
maggimae2: shows [Qc Qh] (two pair, Queens and Sixes)
maggimae2 collected 5725 from pot
ringobingo is connected

(IMMEDIATELY AFTERWARDS!)
aitonsaregay: well i don't know about everybody else but i'm canceling my directv now
chekemchez: absolutely me too, i can't believe they'd do that
jcaz6: me too
aitonsaregay: i can't either
maggimae2: dont thank me
chekemchez: good work maggi
aitonsaregay: thanks

cliff notes: i win teh internets