So I had a date today
 

OK, so there’s this girl who works in my office that I’ve been flirting with for the past several weeks whenever I’ve had the chance. I’m my usual charming self around her (read: socially awkward/inept) but for some reason she seems to be into that so I decide to run with it. Now my job is fairly mundane and this girl has been one of the few bright spots, so chatting/hanging out with her has been a fairly regular part of my work day for around a month now.

So in the middle of one of our standard mid morning chats I finally work up the courage to ask her out; she seems slightly surprised at first but eventually recovers and says “yeah I’d love that.”

Maybe this was a fumble on my part, but what I end up deciding we'll do is go to the office picnic together (our office hosts a picnic for its employees and their families twice a year, sort of a get to know your co-workers kind of thing). For some reason I thought it’d be more relaxed than a typical first date, but the down side is not as much alone time and maybe it doesn’t have quite the romantic feel I should be going for?

Day of the picnic arrives and I get over to her apartment complex to pick her up, knock on door, and some random guy opens it. I’m thinking wtf who is this guy, this can’t be her boyfriend, she does know this is a date, right? Well of course I keep my composure as the guy says to me “Oh hey you must be John, Cathy’ll be ready any minute, she just got outta the shower.” So I sit and make small talk with this Ron guy for a few minutes, never quite building up the confidence to ask him what the [censored] he's doing here. Eventually Cathy is ready and we leave.

In the car the following conversation takes place:

Me: So, Ron seems like a nice guy.
Her: Yeah he is. He’s the best.
Me: You two roommates?
Her: No, not really.
Me: Oh.

So that was the end of that. I didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot by giving her the Spanish Inquisition about her "friend", but I did spend the next twenty minutes puzzling over whether or not she had ever mentioned a Ron or a boyfriend to me in any of our chats; I decided that in fact she had not.

Finally we get to the picnic, it’s at a big park. There's a bbq set up under a tent, and a lot of tables and things. Most of our co-workers are already there; some are eating and relaxing under the tent, the younger guys are playing touch football on the grass, and some of the families are over by the playground watching their kids play. Right away we get suckered into some team building exercise the boss has set up where we have to pick a partner and find out three things about them (I obv. pick Cathy). The exercise is lame, but I think I make her laugh a few times with some bad jokes and generally feel like I’m being very charming.

Not much happens for the next hour and a half or so, we sort of get separated but finally I find her sitting near a tree; it’s fairly sunny out and she’s starting at the clouds. She seems happy I came over and we start to talk about some random stuff, cutlery or something, her dad is a chef. Anyway we get to a moment where I’m obviously supposed to kiss her so I lean in. It goes well for about one tenth of one second until I feel her start to pull away; she follows this with a “no no, I can’t kiss you, it will ruin our friendship.” She mentions something about a boyfriend who recently moved away then sort of goes back to looking at the clouds as if nothing has happened. She starts to name animals that the clouds resemble, asking if I see it too. I sort of nod yes but I don’t really see any of it.

Eventually I drive her back to her place. The car ride is mostly silent. I turn on the radio to hopefully avoid small talk, but she doesn’t seem interested in talking either so it's fine. She starts to get out of the car, stops mid way, and sort of touches my shoulder as she says “please please don’t hate me, I hope we can still be friends.” I gave her a polite nod and said “yeah of course. have a good weekend” before making my retreat.

I don’t especially care to see this girl on Monday, but there doesn’t seem to be any way around that. I suppose I could quit, but leaving the highest salaried job I’ve had since college just to avoid months or maybe years of awkward conversation seems a bit much. I'll probably just ignore her for the time being. I don't get why every girl I even attempt to like immediately puts me in the friend zone. Didn't she realize I was asking her out on a date? Why does she feel I'm so unqualified as boyfriend material while well suited for the friend role? And who the [censored] is Ron?

Anyway I don’t really know how to end this, so I guess that’ll be it…

Re: So I had a date today
 

third

Re: So I had a date today
 

just be a giant ass to her from here forward. problem solved.

Re: So I had a date today
 

rape her

Re: So I had a date today
 

I fear you may have put yourself in "friend zone" by asking her to the company picnic as opposed to a real date; dinner, movie, miniature golf-something where it's just the two of you.

Re: So I had a date today
 

whoisthedrizzle= http://animal-world.com/encyclo/rept...WHLI_Ap4RL.jpg

Re: So I had a date today
 

Sorry dude. If you need BBV4L to get the trainwreck started, just say the word.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Burn down your office building over the weekend so you won't have to see her on Moday.

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
Burn down your office building over the weekend so you won't have to see her on Moday.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think this is best reserved for when they move him to the basement or take his stapler.

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
Maybe this was a fumble on my part, but what I end up deciding we'll do is go to the office picnic together

[/ QUOTE ]

how do you people suck at dating this [censored] much

Re: So I had a date today
 

Desire alternates with regret.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Sorry Goofy...wait...

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
I fear you may have put yourself in "friend zone" by asking her to the company picnic as opposed to a real date; dinner, movie, miniature golf-something where it's just the two of you.

[/ QUOTE ]
no way the date destination was the deciding factor in this considering they had known each other for a while now

this story was really depressing to me for some reason [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Maybe this was a fumble on my part, but what I end up deciding we'll do is go to the office picnic together

[/ QUOTE ]

how do you people suck at dating this [censored] much

[/ QUOTE ]

QFT!

Maybe she still had the taste of Ron in her mouth, and that's why she didn't want to kiss you?

Re: So I had a date today
 

thats rough bro, but at least you had balls to ask her out and go for a kiss, you'll be fine. u didnt do anything wrong this bitch is just dumb.

Re: So I had a date today
 

I don't find this funny one bit.

Re: So I had a date today
 

it wasn't the date that he [censored] up, it's probably all the retarded conversations you've been having with her at work about her clothes and her hair and her cats and her parents that made her think you're gay or just a "really nice guy, a friend".

when are you guys going to realize that you kinda have to be a dick with girls. honestly. it's kinda like 3rd grade where if you like the girl you treat her like [censored] ftw

Re: So I had a date today
 

pull her hair and wrestle with her

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
Day of the picnic arrives and I get over to her apartment complex to pick her up, knock on door, and some random guy opens it. I’m thinking wtf who is this guy, this can’t be her boyfriend, she does know this is a date, right? Well of course I keep my composure as the guy says to me “Oh hey you must be John, Cathy’ll be ready any minute, she just got outta the shower.” So I sit and make small talk with this Ron guy for a few minutes, never quite building up the confidence to ask him what the [censored] he's doing here. Eventually Cathy is ready and we leave.

In the car the following conversation takes place:

Me: So, Ron seems like a nice guy.
Her: Yeah he is. He’s the best.
Me: You two roommates?
Her: No, not really.
Me: Oh.

So that was the end of that. I didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot by giving her the Spanish Inquisition about her "friend", but I did spend the next twenty minutes puzzling over whether or not she had ever mentioned a Ron or a boyfriend to me in any of our chats; I decided that in fact she had not.

[/ QUOTE ]

I must say that this part of the post had me laughing out loud. Was Ron tucking his [censored] back into his pants as he opened the door? It couldn't have been much more blatant than if he had said "Cathy will be right out, I just finished [censored] her in the shower."

Hahahahaha

TO GET OUT OF FRIEND ZONE WITH NEXT WOMAN: Flirt, make sexual jokes and innuendos, and talk about sexing other girls, check her body out unabashedly, be a sexual man. It's really not that hard. Don't talk about cutlery FFS.

Re: So I had a date today
 

wow this is crazy bad.

[ QUOTE ]
Maybe this was a fumble on my part, but what I end up deciding we'll do is go to the office picnic together (our office hosts a picnic for its employees and their families twice a year, sort of a get to know your co-workers kind of thing). For some reason I thought it’d be more relaxed than a typical first date, but the down side is not as much alone time and maybe it doesn’t have quite the romantic feel I should be going for?

[/ QUOTE ]

This is awful, these are work people, don't do this to a girl you work with.

[ QUOTE ]
Day of the picnic arrives and I get over to her apartment complex to pick her up, knock on door, and some random guy opens it. I’m thinking wtf who is this guy, this can’t be her boyfriend, she does know this is a date, right? Well of course I keep my composure as the guy says to me “Oh hey you must be John, Cathy’ll be ready any minute, she just got outta the shower.” So I sit and make small talk with this Ron guy for a few minutes, never quite building up the confidence to ask him what the [censored] he's doing here. Eventually Cathy is ready and we leave.

In the car the following conversation takes place:

Me: So, Ron seems like a nice guy.
Her: Yeah he is. He’s the best.
Me: You two roommates?
Her: No, not really.
Me: Oh.

[/ QUOTE ]

How hard is it to ask the guy "so... how do you know cathy?". How hard is it in the car to say "so he's your husband then?" and laugh.

[ QUOTE ]
Anyway we get to a moment where I’m obviously supposed to kiss her so I lean in. It goes well for about one tenth of one second until I feel her start to pull away; she follows this with a “no no, I can’t kiss you, it will ruin our friendship.” She mentions something about a boyfriend who recently moved away then sort of goes back to looking at the clouds as if nothing has happened. She starts to name animals that the clouds resemble, asking if I see it too. I sort of nod yes but I don’t really see any of it.

[/ QUOTE ]

If you're not feeling a good vibe don't push it or at least just start by holding her hand or something and see what she does. After the "friendship" line just say "oh I thought was like a date date". If she blows you off then thats that, go hang out with your coworkers.

[ QUOTE ]
Eventually I drive her back to her place. The car ride is mostly silent. I turn on the radio to hopefully avoid small talk, but she doesn’t seem interested in talking either so it's fine. She starts to get out of the car, stops mid way, and sort of touches my shoulder as she says “please please don’t hate me, I hope we can still be friends.” I gave her a polite nod and said “yeah of course. have a good weekend” before making my retreat.

[/ QUOTE ]

about the only thing you did good, just because it didn't work out with this girl doesn't mean you have to burn bridges or get all pissed.

[ QUOTE ]
I don’t especially care to see this girl on Monday, but there doesn’t seem to be any way around that. I suppose I could quit, but leaving the highest salaried job I’ve had since college just to avoid months or maybe years of awkward conversation seems a bit much. I'll probably just ignore her for the time being. I don't get why every girl I even attempt to like immediately puts me in the friend zone. Didn't she realize I was asking her out on a date? Why does she feel I'm so unqualified as boyfriend material while well suited for the friend role? And who the [censored] is Ron?

[/ QUOTE ]

Its just some b---- no need to change your life or get down about it at all, just pretend nothing happened - it didn't work out, no big deal. Apparently she didn't feel an attraction to you and didn't want to hurt your feelings by turning you down, girls do this all the time. Ron is a guy who's banging her i.e. not you.

Re: So I had a date today
 

I don't know why any of this is that big a deal - this is gonna happen several more times to you, and this was a risk you took by mixing biz with pleasure. Suck it up, big boy, and show up to work like it's no big deal. There are worse things than getting turned down by 1 girl - going about your life like normal, brushing this off and actively pursuing another broad are ALL things that move you out of the "friends" funk that your in. Being sorry for yourself, putting up with girls that just want your friendship, and generally moping are what GET you slotted into this kind of [censored].

Re: So I had a date today
 

Who could not be attracted to the drizzle? come on.

Re: So I had a date today
 

You should thank god she didn't kiss you as she likely had Ron's Sea-Man residue in her mouth.

I 2nd the be sexual around her thing. If she acts awkward about it then decide whether to just blow her off completely or if you are cool just joking around with her for fun.

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
I didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot by giving her the Spanish Inquisition about her "friend",

[/ QUOTE ]

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisiton!!


http://www.qrz.com/uploads/post-7-71...nquisition.jpg

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
You should thank god she didn't kiss you as she likely had Ron's Sea-Man residue in her mouth.

I 2nd the be sexual around her thing. If she acts awkward about it then decide whether to just blow her off completely or if you are cool just joking around with her for fun.

[/ QUOTE ]

They weren't suggesting be sexual around her.. it's way too late for that. They were suggesting doing that to the next girl.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Schtick it in and you'll be fine. Trust me.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Misread, but still applies.

One shoot down != give up.

If after making 'sexy eyes' at her 'crotchal region' she pukes then it is time to give up.

Or rape her.... or rape Ron and make her watch.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Offer a 3-some with Ron, it just might work.

Re: So I had a date today
 

lol at 50% of the posters in this thread.

Re: So I had a date today
 

You definitely pooched the location. What chick wants to be seen kissing someone from the office at the company picnic? Especially someone everyone knows is not her boyfriend, or even someone she's been dating. This isn't the let's get wasted christmass party where it's okay to bone in the bathroom stall *brag*, it's the bring the kids company picnic.

That said, the fact that you picked her up and there was a guy there that she didn't define in some way is a bad sign off the cut. If she was very interested when you asked about him, she would have said "he's my gay hair stylist, my cousin, my roommates bf etc..." so as not to worry you.

So off the bat you were behind the 8 ball, but not out of it. You should have flirted at the picnic, a little 3 legged race, some innuendo about that, make sure she's sneaking touches back, then move the party to an evening location where you can progress from there.


cliffnotes:going for first kiss in daylight work environment is sure fail.

Re: So I had a date today
 

I laughed. Which is funny because you were in my dreams last night.

Re: So I had a date today
 

Go down on Ron. It's the closest you'll ever get to Cathy's snatch.

Re: So I had a date today
 

this sounds very ootish, I thought this was supposed to be a fake ericW post?

Re: So I had a date today
 

Just ignore/be mean to her. Don't be her friend.

Re: So I had a date today
 

I envy Ron. Stickin' it to the chick and making other schlubs in the world do the mandatory boyfriend nonsense like company picnics. NH RON.

Re: So I had a date today
 

I almost don't even wanna say this, but congrats goes out to the drizzle for levelling almost every person to respond in this thread. Teh1337zor pwned in this, and no one got it.

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
I envy Ron. Stickin' it to the chick and making other schlubs in the world do the mandatory boyfriend nonsense like company picnics. NH RON.

[/ QUOTE ]

kudos to you sir!

Re: So I had a date today
 

[ QUOTE ]
this sounds very ootish, I thought this was supposed to be a fake ericW post?

[/ QUOTE ]

did you see the loc or avatar?

Re: So I had a date today
 

Reading the title I knew I was gonna be disappointed/sad for OP, and sure enuff...

Re: So I had a date today
 

You know what? Don't think you got into the friends category because you asked her to the company picnic. You were always there from day one. Girls know whether they are gonna put out for a guy or not within the first 15 seconds they meet you. So don't feel too bad, she just wasn't attracted to you in that way. And yes, Ron is getting some from her...