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-   -   BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos (http://archives1.twoplustwo.com/showthread.php?t=407223)

GittyUP 05-19-2007 06:14 PM

BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Ok this happened a couple weeks ago but I decided to post this story based on another related beat story I just read.

Background: I made a bet with my room mate and lost. We had bet three Chipotle burritos. (we always bet in burritos because of our obsession with Chipotle) So at this point I am -3 burritos. I also live in a large college house with 7 guys total.

9pm later that night: A bunch of my friends and me were drinking at a bar when we noticed that the table next to us kept turning around and staring at us. The table was 2 guys and 1 fat girl Eventually they sent over the "shot girl" and bought us shots. As it turns out the 2 guys were gay and one of them liked one of my room mates(whos not gay) and the fat ugly girl liked me. She ended up making me put her number in my phone and watched closely to make sure I got it. All I was thinking at this point is we need to get out of this situation as fast as possible. We left shortly there after.
Now its about 2am and we are at our 4th bar for the night. This bar happens to have a special on martini's and I quickly down two straight vodka martinis when my friend tells me that if I [censored] the fat ungly girl I dont owe him his 3 burritos anymore. All my other room mates convinced me that this was a good idea. Ok I thought Ill do it. I call her up and she says she'll meet me near my house. Im walking home and a car screaches up to the curb and sure enough the fatty get out the passenger door and the car drives off. We walk to my house another block or so and go immediately to my bedroom and I start to do my business. I put on the condom and start to do my thing when the stench got to me. It smelled so bad that it made me sick so I stopped and rolled over against the wall (I only have a single bed) and passed out.

The next morning I wake up at 9am shes still there. Roll over wake up again a little while later. Damn shes still there. I stay huddled up against my wall until noon when I decide its time to end this. I tell her I have class and I need to leave. I tell her to walk home but she says she lives too far. I tell her to take a cab she says she has no money. She notices my room mates car out the window and asks If one of my room mates would drive her home. I go upstairs and find 4 of my roomates taking bong hits and laughing at me.

"oh my god you fcked a fat chick for 3 burrtios"
"oh my god she was so ugly!"
"She smelled so bad too" I responded. I only stuck it in for a few seconds..."
"That doesn't count" they responded yada yada it went on.

They refused to drive her home and so I went back out only to find her sitting on the stairs crying. SHE HEARD EVERYTHING WE JUST SAID!!!!!
I ran back into the room and begged my friends to drive her home but at this point they were laughing even harder.

I grabbed my friends keys and proceeded to make the WORST 15 minute drive of my entire life. I think we spoke 1 sentence the entire ride. AWKWARD.

At least I didn't have to watch my friend enjoy 3 burritos on me right?

magicratx 05-19-2007 06:17 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
awesome, bbv aplauds you

A+++

mugatu668 05-19-2007 06:20 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Hmm, I thought he was going to dare you to eat a burrito out of her vag
also, A+++

TresDeuce 05-19-2007 06:26 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
haha, suprisingly good read

naSTIboost 05-19-2007 06:35 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Nice. What kind of burritos were they though?

DefThreats 05-19-2007 06:38 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]

They refused to drive her home and so I went back out only to find her sitting on the stairs crying. SHE HEARD EVERYTHING WE JUST SAID!!!!!


[/ QUOTE ]

This is very funny and sad at the same time (poor girl) [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

nation 05-19-2007 06:40 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
oh man that sucks that she heard you. funny story though i would have done the same to erase the 3 burrito debt.

dtan05 05-19-2007 06:41 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
lol A+.

wrschultz 05-19-2007 06:44 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Greatest story ever... I also have a chipotle obsession, and I think I'm going to start betting burritos with my friends as well.

Superfluous Man 05-19-2007 06:45 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
oh man that sucks that she heard you. funny story though i would have done the same even if i had to incur a 3 burrito debt.

[/ QUOTE ]
fixed for you based on previous posts

Full-Metall 05-19-2007 06:45 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
I was with a fat chick once. I'd pay thousands of burritos to erase those awful memories [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

jschaud 05-19-2007 06:47 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
the ugliness/fatness of a chick you bang to win a bet makes it more heroic. Adding in the stench, he should owe you one.

phantom_lord 05-19-2007 06:48 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
A+

IvanXDurham 05-19-2007 06:51 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
The best part is that we just heard the campfire story of Bertha Mcloud's "Worst Day Ever". LMFAO. Think about it, if she has even found a boyfriend by now, he weeps while the degenerates cheer. I love it. A++++

Archon_Wing 05-19-2007 06:51 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Ok, I guess something could be worse than playing micros.

Running at 150 PTburrito/100 fat chicks hopefully.

OHFreak 05-19-2007 06:53 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
There really should be some sort of Online Free Burrito Coupon Clearinghouse for settling these kinds of prop bets. Perfect for BBV/BBV4L.

Like the internet's good for [censored] all else.

hap 05-19-2007 06:53 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
I put on the condom and start to do my thing when the stench got to me. It smelled so bad that it made me sick so I stopped and rolled over against the wall (I only have a single bed) and passed out.

[/ QUOTE ]

What was the smell? Her armpits, her vagina or your own penis?

Warteen 05-19-2007 07:00 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Did I accidentally go to BBV4Lyfe?

IvanXDurham 05-19-2007 07:01 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Like the kitchen trash sprayed with perfume.

adanthar 05-19-2007 07:22 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
we do have a forum for fat chick beats you know

DannyOcean_ 05-19-2007 08:54 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
we do have a forum for fat chick beats you know

[/ QUOTE ]

possibly too level headed

bills427 05-19-2007 08:55 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
hahaha A+

prodonkey 05-19-2007 08:56 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
we do have a forum for fat chick beats you know

[/ QUOTE ]

the mod forum is the fat chick beat forum now?

Thrahl 05-19-2007 09:11 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
I put on the condom and start to do my thing when the stench got to me. It smelled so bad that it made me sick

[/ QUOTE ]

I think you stuck it in the wrong hole.

Also for future reference, its standard to just get head from the Uggos. That way you dont have to see them naked and its easier to kick them out when they still have their shoes on.

SuperNooB 05-20-2007 02:01 AM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[censored] happens..

Reef 05-20-2007 02:08 AM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
lol A+.

[/ QUOTE ]

ghostface 05-20-2007 02:19 AM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
im going to assume

i put on my robe and wizard hat.

grouchie 05-20-2007 03:23 AM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
What is the defination of a fat chick?

How fat are we talking?
300 lbs? 350?

Some things need to be stated.

time4adrank 05-20-2007 03:37 AM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
What is the defination of a fat chick?

How fat are we talking?
300 lbs? 350?

Some things need to be stated.

[/ QUOTE ]

true. what is the limit that chubby turns into full-blown fat?

DaAznFella 05-20-2007 06:09 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
gold

GittyUP 11-30-2007 01:16 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
a friend of mine wanted me to bump this for others to enjoy.

Jenkem 11-30-2007 01:23 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
this is the best thread i've ever read

Quanah Parker 11-30-2007 02:36 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
They refused to drive her home and so I went back out only to find her sitting on the stairs crying. SHE HEARD EVERYTHING WE JUST SAID!!!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

No doubt.
If you had offered her a free burrito or two, those tears will dry right up.

Next time you're down a few tacos, remember to get the thick girl into the shower pre-coitus.

If you'd stick to skinny deaf girls, you'd never have this problem in the first place.

PITTM 11-30-2007 03:32 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
tbh this story made me feel bad for the fat chick the first time i read it and i still do. I dont like the super over the top thing someone will feel horrible about for a long time kind of meanness imo.

illeagle 11-30-2007 03:52 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
look at this guy here. he has feelings and empathy and [censored]. what a [censored] hero on the internet.

916greatest 11-30-2007 03:55 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
Omg!! Ewwww!!! That's so sick!!! Bleeeeh hella smelly and [censored]!!!

A+++++++

Aahaha ur that stenchy for a couple bucks. Uhhhhhh!!

Now u got to live with that the rest of your life!!

A+++++

Poor girl

Tartufo 11-30-2007 04:05 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
[ QUOTE ]
tbh this story made me feel bad for the fat chick the first time i read it and i still do. I dont like the super over the top thing someone will feel horrible about for a long time kind of meanness imo.

[/ QUOTE ]

I partly agree with this sentiment, and she'll probably be scarred from this experience, but on the other hand FFS vacuum your cooter every now and then, especially if you're looking to get laid.

Mr. Met 11-30-2007 04:06 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
thank you for this thread. i had a chipotle burrito for lunch because of this and it was delicious

rhymenocerus 11-30-2007 04:07 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To sit on my throne, the Prince of Bel Air

En Passant 11-30-2007 04:15 PM

Re: BEAT: what I did for 3 burritos
 
how fat was she?


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