Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

MSPAINT Cliffs notes at bottom:

A few weeks ago, I meet this cute girl at the video store, and she gives me her number. She seemed really weird, but pretty nice. Anyway, I didn't call her for the last few weeks, because I was putting it off and I'm not that into her.

Tonight I run into her again. She says Hi, and immediately starts molesting me physically. First she hugs me, then she starts touching my face and my hands "what is that on your face?"
"Ummmm, I dunno?"
"I dunno"
"Is it a pimple?"
"Well, I have a mole"
"Oh, you have a mole?"
"Yeah...."

So then I go inside to find my dvd, because videos are serious business. She follows me around, after she gets her DVD, and then she starts to detail her medical problems, and criminal history for me. I think about 60% of this is imaginary. Occasionally, she asks me a question like "Did you study computer programming?" "Uhhhhh, no"
Or "Do you go to the gym" and then she continues to tell me her life story with a memento-esque narrative that is impossible to understand.

Anyway, when I left the video store, she followed me out, and asked me for a ride to her car. So I say ok. When I drive her to her car, it becomes pretty clear that what I just did made no sense whatsoever, because it ended up being more walking for her.

http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g2...ch/carride.jpg



I pull up beside her car to drop her off, but she doesn't get out. Instead, she continues talking about stuff that makes no sense at all. And occasionally, she will ask me a question that makes even less sense and with absolutely no context "Do you think persian males have a reputation for hoeing their girlfriends out?"
"No?????"

Then she's about to leave my car, when instead she just starts CRYING. ????? I ask "why are you crying?"
She says "My ex boyfriend who is a doctor gave a massage to someone for 40 dollars and I saw him do it, and I'm a masage therapist. I just need people to treat money as favors. I have so many medical bills and I might have cancer (she doesn't have cancer). Tomorrow, I am going to give Richard Rodriguez a depp groin massage (??????) and I need to show him a video of me so I can get acting work...."
etc etc etc.

I think she spent like 45 minutes in my car with this spiel.

Brag: cute girl at video store was physically molesting me
Beat: She's a looney toon
Variance: I'm supposed to meet her for lunch tomorrow

cliffs notes:
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g2.../CryingCar.jpg

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Wow she is barking mad good luck. Pictures of this chick? I might know her.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Beat: I can't believe I read all this.

Why are you having lunch with her tomorrow, wtf?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

I loled really hard at this. this chick is batsh** crazy and you're gonna get lunch with her? ridiculous. she needs to be at least an 11.5 for this to be worth the trouble haha.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

I'm pretty sure she was on drugs tonight. like a lot of drugs. Maybe LSD or a [censored] of painpills or something. She told me last time I saw her she was high on weed.

Maybe she'll be on a different drug tomorrow?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Demand she buys, to further lower her self esteem.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]

Wow she is barking mad good luck. Pictures of this chick? I might know her.


[/ QUOTE ]

I don't have any pics of her. I'll take some tomorrow though if she lets me. You think you know her? Where do you live? PM me her name if you think you know her. I don't wanna trainwreck this just yet

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

B
Amazing sex in the horizon

B
Spending all your money and then trying to stab you.

V
Endless made up fairy tale stories about inpending disasters

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

1 Cancel lunch
2 Go to a new video store (since you are on file she probably already knows where you live).

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]

Beat: I can't believe I read all this.

Why are you having lunch with her tomorrow, wtf?


[/ QUOTE ]

I was thinking of putting my penis inside of her.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

She said a lot crazier stuff than I posted, but I don't think she could possibly be this nuts. I mean, if you are that crazy, how are you even alive? She had to be on ecstasy or something.
Supposedly, she's in AA though? She's also in OA (overeaters anonymous) because she used to be bulemic. Basically, she's Marla Singer

http://www.kindofcrap.com/marla1.gif

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

quite possibly the epitome of greatness.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Dog,

She can absolutely be that insane. Fake cancer is kind of standard.

Hypochondriac, drug addicted, bipolar stalkers ftw.

The sex will be incredible, but the fake pregnancy is gonna suck.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

haha, when she got into my car she said "I'm not gonna steal from you"
I should have responded "I'm not gonna leave you naked and half alive in a wash"

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

WTF this sounds kinda hot if you ask me. Should be a long, wild ride (in more ways than one).

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
haha, when she got into my car she said "I'm not gonna steal from you"
I should have responded "I'm not gonna leave you naked and half alive in a wash"

[/ QUOTE ]

yes, you shouldve. but then not kept to your word. ldo.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[censored] her like she hasn't been [censored] since gradeschool

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

I ran into her outside the video store, but after we went in, stood in the doorway looking out at the street with her nose pressed up against the glass for about 5 minutes. I walked up to her and asked "what are you looking at?" She ignored me (or didn't hear me?) so I asked again and touched her shoulder. She turns around and has a look on her face as though I just interrupted her in the middle of a very important task, and then she answers "I was just looking at the street"

Riiiiiight. Logically that's the first thing to do when one goes inside the video store?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

do you have a basement? You can find one of these-

http://www.china-coronet.com/images/cages/hzby-0210.jpg

at any pet store.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

jesus she's on some mad drugs.

SIIHP hard

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

You must be REALLY desperate.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Rofl at potentially getting rodriguez's sloppy seconds

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Oh dude I have definitely shacked up with a few girls of this-level craziness. They are relatively better lays than their more normal, functional counterparts. Hit it, then don't call her for a week. She will call you every day, multiple times a day. Ignore them all. Then as soon as she stops calling, call her obsessively. Tell her that you love her and you need to see her. Go hit it again, then leave in a rage. Repeat the same ignore/call back procedure. Girls who act this crazy get something out of it, you totally take away their edge if you act irrationally and crazy too. Plus it's massively fun.

...
Step 4) end up in hell, if there's a hell... whatever though. When you are faced with an ethical question, remember to always ask yourself: WWBBVTYTD? (what would BBV tell you to do?)

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
Oh dude I have definitely shacked up with a few girls of this-level craziness. They are relatively better lays than their more normal, functional counterparts. Hit it, then don't call her for a week. She will call you every day, multiple times a day. Ignore them all. Then as soon as she stops calling, call her obsessively. Tell her that you love her and you need to see her. Go hit it again, then leave in a rage. Repeat the same ignore/call back procedure. Girls who act this crazy get something out of it, you totally take away their edge if you act irrationally and crazy too. Plus it's massively fun.


[/ QUOTE ]

wow dude. that sounds genius. Have you actually pulled this off?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
Rofl at potentially getting rodriguez's sloppy seconds


[/ QUOTE ]

Are you trying to say that a deep groin massage is a sexual thing? [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Oh dude I have definitely shacked up with a few girls of this-level craziness. They are relatively better lays than their more normal, functional counterparts. Hit it, then don't call her for a week. She will call you every day, multiple times a day. Ignore them all. Then as soon as she stops calling, call her obsessively. Tell her that you love her and you need to see her. Go hit it again, then leave in a rage. Repeat the same ignore/call back procedure. Girls who act this crazy get something out of it, you totally take away their edge if you act irrationally and crazy too. Plus it's massively fun.


[/ QUOTE ]

wow dude. that sounds genius. Have you actually pulled this off?

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah dude, I'm not kidding! Crazy chicks become dependent easily, fall hard for you, etc. Try to see her at her place obviously, since you don't want her randomly dropping in on you, but yeah go for it. It's a giant mixture of the following great things:

above-average sex
being in total control of the "relationship"
messing with someone for fun
acting like a fool

You definitely need to do this lol. I will try to find/post pics of the last crazy girl I did this with, she was a "model" (she was good looking and claimed to be a model, had some decent amateur photographs) and she was totally [censored] nuts. Within 2 days of knowing her, sleeping with her she announced that she loved me. I'd go over, hit it a few times. She'd plead with me to stay the night, I'd leave. She'd call, I'd ignore her for a few days/week or two then call her back, go over, repeat. You need to do this.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

"I think about 60% of this is imaginary. Occasionally, she asks me a question like "Did you study computer programming?" "Uhhhhh, no"
Or "Do you go to the gym" and then she continues to tell me her life story with a memento-esque narrative that is impossible to understand."

this is really strong stuff, more more more.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
Occasionally, she asks me a question like "Did you study computer programming?"

[/ QUOTE ]

"No, but I am the martial arts guru of a poker players' forum."


What the heck, do fighting experts look like computer geeks?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

While it can be discussed if mbillie's approach is ethcical, it is the only option if you want to [censored] chick with crazyness on this level

This is what they will do to you, if you don't do it to them, such are realities.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

wow that is some crazy [censored]. i laughed pretty hard. a++ contribution by mbillie btw.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g2.../CryingCar.jpg

[/ QUOTE ]

Conjoined twins?

[ QUOTE ]
She said a lot crazier stuff than I posted, but I don't think she could possibly be this nuts. I mean, if you are that crazy, how are you even alive? She had to be on ecstasy or something.
Supposedly, she's in AA though? She's also in OA (overeaters anonymous) because she used to be bulemic. Basically, she's Marla Singer

http://www.kindofcrap.com/marla1.gif

[/ QUOTE ]

Secks?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

crazy chicks are great in the sack

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Are you sure she isn't mentally retarded?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
Are you sure she isn't mentally retarded?

[/ QUOTE ]

However whacked out she might be she's that much better in bed. Pics are needed to evaluate fully, but otherwise I stand by my previous advice and recommend that OP go for it, hit it, then [censored] with her for a while. Then keep hitting it, keep [censored] with her, etc. This is very +EV

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

uhhhh isnt it obvious that this girl was attempting to prostitute herself out to OP?

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]

uhhhh isnt it obvious that this girl was attempting to prostitute herself out to OP?



[/ QUOTE ]

that's one of the things I was thinking. It's entirely possible. However, it would have to be one of the worst hard sells ever. I haven't seen any b/c I don't pay for it, but I've been to strip clubs, and strippers don't tell you about getting arrested for shoplifting or getting molested by their fathers (both of which she did without provocation).

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
1 Cancel lunch
2 Go to a new video store (since you are on file she probably already knows where you live).

[/ QUOTE ]
Nooooo! There might me muchz fun down the road. Just be sure you have some OC handy, should she tolly freak out and try to stab u or sthg. Just don't, absolutely don't fall in love with her. It will break you.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

WTF @ nits telling OP not to go for it. Have none of you been with a crazy girl before? Come on. Go for it, enjoy it and then leave in a flurry of your own irrational behavior. If she wants it, don't make her wait. She's a crazy chick, not someone you want a relationship with. Sleep with her immediately. This is one of the key advantages to hooking up with crazy girls anyway - they're easy. If you need a way out, see my earlier posts. There is absolutely no reason not to go have some fun with this.

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

[ QUOTE ]
WTF @ nits telling OP not to go for it. Have none of you been with a crazy girl before? Come on. Go for it, enjoy it and then leave in a flurry of your own irrational behavior. If she wants it, don't make her wait. She's a crazy chick, not someone you want a relationship with. Sleep with her immediately. This is one of the key advantages to hooking up with crazy girls anyway - they're easy. If you need a way out, see my earlier posts. There is absolutely no reason not to go have some fun with this.

[/ QUOTE ]
QFT

Re: Beat: cute girl at video store is totally barking mad + MSPAINT
 

Oh, hi. Look, I bettered your avatar: http://img514.imageshack.us/img514/7686/alizee2hw5.gif