I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

Playing live at the bellagio I made the absolute sickest call ever... I have about 2600 in front of me at a 5/10nl table im in the sb and i limp in with 33... Flop comes qj5 2 diamonds... bb checks button( who limps checks as well) turn is a 6 i bet out about 2/3 of the pot bb then raises me to 100???? This player had been getting absolutely owned earlier on and had been quiet for a while. I just call considering the draw happy board... The river is a blank i check he bets 300????? I then start to think about all the possible hands he could have and then see him put his hands over his mouth and see a bulge in his neck after a huge swallow... I then call and he taps the table and says nice call and turns over his missed flush draw on the turn( A4dd) i then turn over my 33 very proud and get about 8( omg what a [censored] call facial expressions ) yes im very very good... Point to this story is when you read people as well as I do you go with your gut... Most people would get the ( man this guy calls anything tag) with me i got the what a [censored] read rob man... You to could be here just keep practicing. LATES

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

[/ QUOTE ]

ZOMG ME 2

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

[/ QUOTE ]

ZOMG ME 3

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

HURRRRRRRRRRR I SAW THIS CALLDOWN BU MIKE SEXTON ON TV SO NOW IM GONNA MAKE A THREAD WHERE I KINDA DO THE SAME HURRRRRRRRRR

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

mmm yeah this was live poker not tourny poker dont hate cuz your down in the pits grinding away at 5 10cc... not a good way to go through life...

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

$10 says the river that he wont tell us was a 3

by the way, calling a raise with 33 on the turn means you hate money

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
mmm yeah this was live poker not tourny poker dont hate cuz your down in the pits grinding away at 5 10cc... not a good way to go through life...

[/ QUOTE ]

nope im too busy grinding your mother with her ass up face down duct taped to my bed

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
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I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

[/ QUOTE ]

ZOMG ME 3

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

ME 19!

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
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I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

[/ QUOTE ]

ZOMG ME 3

[/ QUOTE ]

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ME 19!

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who the hell voted only for yes?

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
mmm yeah this was live poker not tourny poker dont hate cuz your down in the pits grinding away at 5 10cc... not a good way to go through life...

[/ QUOTE ]

nope im too busy grinding your mother with her ass up face down duct taped to my bed

[/ QUOTE ]

if i was all gangster gangster and head don of the BBV crew Edd would be my personal bodyguard

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
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I VOTED FOR BOTH!!

[/ QUOTE ]

ZOMG ME 3

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]

ME 19!

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who the hell voted only for yes?

[/ QUOTE ]

D'oh! *sheepishly pledges to always look for the two vote option in future*

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

HOLLLLLAA

http://img206.imageshack.us/img206/1...outowaroy1.jpg

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
HOLLLLLAA

http://img206.imageshack.us/img206/1...outowaroy1.jpg

[/ QUOTE ]
YEAH THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN ABOUT, ANYONE WHO TALKS [censored] TO US EDD WOULD GIVE YOU THE VERBAL BEATING OF YOUR LIFE THEN SMASH YOUR NOSE IN WITH THE BUTT OF HIS GUN

THEN WE WOULD LIGHT THOSE CIGARS

WITH THOSE TWENTIES

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

OMGWTF ARE YOU CHALLENGING MY DOMAIN HIPPY BOY? THIS IS MY TURF GO BACK TO SQUABBLING OVER DONKAMENT STRAT/ANDYBEAL JOKES IN WPT FORUM SUCKA.

ARE WE GONNA HAVE THROWDOWN THRU OUR BODY GUARDS UFC MATCH?

Full Rake=I choose YOU!

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

yeah im a balla cause i use $20s to light my cigars with

$50 if i had chili

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

So there was this big fish at my 200NL tables. One day I saw him playing 400NL, so I sat, but nothing special happened. He lost his stack to someone else and I quit. I searched him again, and found he was chasing his losses at 600NL. I told my friend whos a regular at the 600s about it, and he went at sat. Same story, couldn't get any money from him before he busted to someone else. One more search and he comes up at 2000NL heads up. This guy was so fishy my friend couldnt resist and sat with him. That fish's name was sirdonkalot. After 10-15 min play the following hand happened:


Full Tilt Poker
No Limit Holdem Ring game
Blinds: $10/$20
2 players
Converter

Stack sizes:
Hero: $2748
sirdonkalot: $2179.40

Pre-flop: (2 players) Hero is SB with 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]
<font color="#cc0000">Hero raises to $60</font>, sirdonkalot calls.

Flop: K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] Q[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] ($120, 2 players)
esults:
Final pot: $4358.8
sirdonkalot showed 3h 3s
Hero showed 4h 8h
checks, <font color="#cc0000">Hero bets $100</font>, sirdonkalot calls.

Turn: 3[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] ($320, 2 players)
sirdonkalot checks, <font color="#cc0000">Hero bets $240</font>, <font color="#cc0000">sirdonkalot raises to $1040</font>, <font color="#cc0000">Hero raises all-in $2588</font>, <font color="#cc0000">sirdonkalot calls all-in $979.4</font>.
Uncalled bets: $568.6 returned to Hero.

River: 8[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] ($4358.8, 0 player + 2 all-in - Main pot: $4358.8)


Results:
Final pot: $4358.8
sirdonkalot showed 3[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]
Hero showed 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

This hand was Oct. 23. He played for a few days afterwards, but I haven't seen him since [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img].

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

zero, that's gold.

Another answer to where the money comes from. :O

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

I remember this hand... nh u say " i havent been back since" like if ur sad but who the [censored] mucks a set hu??? u stupid idiot i mean seriously learn the hand values and see who mucks a set hu. Now 6 handed is a different story... but no vnh sir/mam cant say i appreciate nor agree with you thinking that was " donkish" of me a set hu regardless of 3 hearts being out there is pretty solid. I raised hoping to take the pot down and when you reraised TRUST ME i knew i was beat but said fux it ive got alot invested ill see if i can pair up

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

Rofl easy call. This is when it gets harder (even though Im a micro stake donk)

PokerStars Game #6941827671: Holdem No Limit ($0.50/$1.00) - 2006/11/08 - 12:44:23 (ET)
Table Echion 6-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: Me ($111.80 in chips)
Seat 2: villain1 ($100 in chips)
Seat 4: villain2($27.70 in chips)
Seat 6: villain3 ($284.85 in chips)
xxxxx: posts small blind $0.50
xxxxxxx: posts big blind $1
xxxxxxtam: sits out
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to xxxxxxx[Ah 8c]
xxxxxx-G: folds
xxxxxxxx: raises $3 to $4
xxxxxxxx: calls $3.50
xxxxxxx: folds
*** FLOP *** [9c 6c 4s]
xxxxxxx: checks
xxxxxxx: bets $7
xxxxxxx: calls $7
*** TURN *** [9c 6c 4s] [Ts]
xxxxxx: checks
xxxxxxx: bets $16
xxxxxxx: calls $16
*** RIVER *** [9c 6c 4s Ts] [4h]
xxxxxxxI: checks
xxxxxxx: bets $257.85 and is all-in
xxxxxxx: calls $84.80 and is all-in
*** SHOW DOWN ***
xxxxxxx: shows [Kd Qs] (a pair of Fours)
xxxxxxx collected $222.60 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $224.60 | Rake $2
Board [9c 6c 4s Ts 4h]
Seat 1: Mxxxxxxx (small blind) showed [Ah 8c] and won ($222.60) with a pair of Fours
Seat 2: xxxxxxx (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 4: sxxxxxxx folded before Flop (didnt bet)
Seat 6:xxxxxxxb (button) showed [Kd Qs] and lost with a pair of Fours

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

[ QUOTE ]
I remember this hand... nh u say " i havent been back since" like if ur sad but who the [censored] mucks a set hu??? u stupid idiot i mean seriously learn the hand values and see who mucks a set hu. Now 6 handed is a different story... but no vnh sir/mam cant say i appreciate nor agree with you thinking that was " donkish" of me a set hu regardless of 3 hearts being out there is pretty solid. I raised hoping to take the pot down and when you reraised TRUST ME i knew i was beat but said fux it ive got alot invested ill see if i can pair up

[/ QUOTE ]
Nice flop check/call, fish.

Re: I am a [censored] master pimp and reader of donkey tourists...
 

I wanted to see what she/he would do if a 4th heart came out... Not to mention that i had a heart in my hand... And hu there is no guarantee that my heart isnt live