How do you open up a shy girl
 

I really am not attracted to girls that are overly talkative or basically obnoxious in my eyes. Therefore I am attracted to girls that are more on the quiet side yet it's so damn hard to get most of them into a legit conversation. I much prefer them to girls that will blab on about crap you don't feel like hearing for an entire night but it seems like I'm actually working hard as hell with these quiet girls.

How do you handle these spots? I feel like I'm dominating conversation, which is a really bad thing, but it seems like if I didn't there would be no conversation at all.

And don't ask me why I prefer mutes.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

FHaters,

It's my experience that the ones that are quiet in public won't STFU once you get them to start talking.

If you still want to go down this path, the correct answer is vodka.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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How do you open up a shy girl

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http://img114.imageshack.us/img114/7...0bottleoc2.jpg

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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I really am not attracted to girls that are overly talkative or basically obnoxious in my eyes. Therefore I am attracted to girls that are more on the quiet side yet it's so damn hard to get most of them into a legit conversation. I much prefer them to girls that will blab on about crap you don't feel like hearing for an entire night but it seems like I'm actually working hard as hell with these quiet girls.

How do you handle these spots? I feel like I'm dominating conversation, which is a really bad thing, but it seems like if I didn't there would be no conversation at all.

And don't ask me why I prefer mutes.

[/ QUOTE ]

What the [censored]?

Am I getting these Cliff's notes right:

"I don't like women who talk too much. But the problem with women who don't talk much is that they don't talk enough. How can I fix?"

I suggest homosexuality as the cure.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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How do you open up a shy girl

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with your fingers, just like any other girl

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

open up that a*hole and step in side

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

I typically find that mutes are generally quiet due to the fact that they just aren't that interesting. Also, IMO, there's a huge spectrum between 'Talkative and Obnoxious' and 'Mute'. Finding a girl somewhere in the middle sounds good.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

spread her legs imo

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

I guess I don't know how to talk to girls or need tutoring or something because it seems like I do all the work and get no responses...though the girls I try with respond the same to friends of mine (basic short responses with smiles) which makes things awkward as hell.

I honestly don't know what to say to girls when I'm out and drunk after a while.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

FGators,

Some people are just more comfortable being the listener in the conversation. Dominating the conversation is not necessarily a bad thing - the girl may be more comfortable that way. If you're comfortable with talking, then it's fine.

You can try asking a lot more questions - seems basic, but some people need promting to get them to talk. If all you get is short answers, but the girl still seems interested in you, then she is probably just a listener.

And agreed with tuq, a lot of seemingly quiet girls won't stfu once they get to know you and/or you're in private.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

OP-- Find a common interest or connection and go from there. Ask questions and act interested in what she has to say. If you have nothing in common, abort. This is all pretty fundamental.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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I honestly don't know what to say to girls when I'm out and drunk after a while.

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At last we uncover the real problem. Many guys need years of therapy before they realize this.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
El Guapo: Jefe, you do not understand women. You cannot force open the petals of a flower. When the flower is ready, it opens itself up to you.
Jefe: So when do you think Carmen will open up her flower to you?
El Guapo: Tonight, or I will kill her!



[/ QUOTE ]

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Forceps.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

I mean honestly if I'm with a girl I know semi well and its a club setting I really don't say much and rather talk to my guy friends about things like sports,etc then talk to the girl because honestly I have no [censored] clue what to say so thats my point of the thread.

I can respond well to questions but I never have a good opener.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

GHB

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
open up that a*hole and step in side

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i hope i see more leon quotes answering lifetards' questions for OOT

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

OP,

I think I understand your situation. You don't like girls who talk too much, but you don't want to seem like you're dominating a conversation with a quiet girl, despite the fact that you don't know how to talk to either type of girl.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Button first, then zipper.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Incidentally, the title of this thread sounds like it should be "dead baby" instead of shy girl.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u...lbum/knife.jpg

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I lol:ed.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
OP,

I think I understand your situation. You don't like girls who talk too much, but you don't want to seem like you're dominating a conversation with a quiet girl, despite the fact that you don't know how to talk to either type of girl.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yup. I think you pretty much nailed it.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Ask questions.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Show them your documents...

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Initially you're going to dominate the conversation. That's just the way things work unfortunately.

But once you create a vibe with her, you need to get her talking for a significant amount of your conversation (~40%).

There are three ideas that will help.

1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

Yugoslav

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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Forceps.

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Nice. I wanted to give an answer like this but 5 or 6 people beat me to it. I think forceps is a winner.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

speculum

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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[ QUOTE ]
Forceps.

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Nice. I wanted to give an answer like this but 5 or 6 people beat me to it. I think forceps is a winner.

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With some of the broads I've gone out with, the correct answer is more like "jaws of life":

http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j3...2/JOLtestB.jpg

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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How do you open up a shy girl

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Put one hand on one leg, one land on the other and pull them apart.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u...lbum/knife.jpg

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excellent

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Alcohol

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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http://driveinbottleshop.dk/shop/com...0047ab06ac.jpg

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Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

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Initially you're going to dominate the conversation. That's just the way things work unfortunately.

But once you create a vibe with her, you need to get her talking for a significant amount of your conversation (~40%).

There are three ideas that will help.

1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

Yugoslav

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I'm now looking through your previous posts.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

Yugo totally owns these discussions. Damn I'm so bummed he couldn't join us in LA a couple of weeks ago, would have loved to see him in action.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Speaking as a woman, dating you sounds like entirely too much work.

(Returns to lurking, since OP prefers women to be seen and not heard.)

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Speaking as a woman, dating you sounds like entirely too much work.

(Returns to lurking, since OP prefers women to be seen and not heard.)

[/ QUOTE ]

possibly the greatest level ever.

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Speaking as a woman, dating you sounds like entirely too much work.

(Returns to lurking, since OP prefers women to be seen and not heard.)

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't spend my time with women who are passive spectators.

Yugoslav

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

pretend like you're going into insulin shock

Re: How do you open up a shy girl
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
1) Allow her to qualify herself. She won't feel invested in the conversation until she actually reveals something of substance about herself. A standard line for letting her qualify herself is "so what do you have going for you besides your looks?" In your case something that could work is "wow, I thought you were such a shy, quiet thing but now you won't stop giggling. That's awesome (bring her in for a hug or high-five or reward her physically in some way)!"

2) Create a vacuum when you ask a question. There are correct and incorrect ways to ask non yes/no questions. When you ask one after you've hooked her into an interaction, let/make her answer. Ask the question and look at her expectantly. Don't take the conversational pressure off of her by continuing to talk or explain the question. If she gives a lame answer, call her out on it, re-apply conversational pressure. It's this "vacuum" of providing a topic for her and then not talking that will help get her out of her shell.

3) Foreshadow. Very early on in the interaction try to work into a story or life-view that you value women who can hold their own in two-way conversations. This is also another opportunity for her to qualify herself by adopting that role you set up.

[/ QUOTE ]

Speaking as a woman, dating you sounds like entirely too much work.

(Returns to lurking, since OP prefers women to be seen and not heard.)

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't spend my time with women who are passive spectators.

Yugoslav

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Your wife says hi.