Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

joker,

If you didn't have this problem, would you marry the girl tomorrow? If not, walk away now. If so, then pray like hell that she has the courage to stand up to your mother. Otherwise, run away.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

marry her.

that should solve it, no?

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

There's nothing EDF can help you with on this one. Your girlfriend just needs to care about her own damned life and stand up to her mother. I can't see how you could be attracted to a girl that could not do that in this situation.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

I'm having trouble understanding what Catholicism has to do with any of this.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

[ QUOTE ]
The question isn’t whether or not I should stick with her – that’s beside the point.

[/ QUOTE ]

This really hits the nail on the head because, all things considered, you and she don't have a viable relationship.

Sadly, you can't really do much to help her out either. If anything, you need to convince her to stand up to her mother. Good luck.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

I dated a Vietnamese girl for 3 years basically hidden from her parents. It was easy because we were in college fairly far from them.

She is mind [censored]. Her parents have very old fashioned values and think she is worthless whore for having boyfriends who don't intend to marry her (or at least would if they knew about it). As far as the arranged marriage thing the bottom line is they can't make her do it. If she is even considering marrying the guy merely to please her parents, then I would suggest you break it off for your own well being. Otherwise just support her through the deep pain and possible other consequences of disobeying them.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

[ QUOTE ]
I'm having trouble understanding what Catholicism has to do with any of this.

[/ QUOTE ]

Me too. Catholicism doesn't go for this arranged marriage bs.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm having trouble understanding what Catholicism has to do with any of this.

[/ QUOTE ]

Me too. Catholicism doesn't go for this arranged marriage bs.

[/ QUOTE ]

He is not Catholic, and she is presumably having sex with him before marriage. Two large points against their relationship in the eyes of her parents if they were to know.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

I read the whole thing and I understand you really care but I didn't see anywhere you saying that you love her. The situation is ridiculous for her in every way but what you really want or should do I think depends a lot on that.

Re: Weighty issue I feel powerless to handle (Longest Post Ever OMG)
 

now this is a grad-school level girl problem!