Two Plus Two Newer Archives - Where's perkyshmerky?

This is a true story that took place in late June primarily in an apartment in Trump Towers (58th and 5th) in New York City.

Stuttgard. Its not in the glossary so dont bother. Most of you are probably thinking, “I never ate a Stuttgard.” Yea well that makes two of us. Thats because it is a city in God knows where Germany. And somehow, for two days in the middle of May, I found myself there. Lets go back in time a bit. I left Australia for Manila in early May with Mike (Pancakes as we call him) and Mark Vos. We split up however, as they headed for Prague and I went to Rome to meet up with Durrr and Alan Sans. From there they went home and I left for Germany. Now that you know the boring parts lets proceed. I had met a girl while traveling up the Gold Coast (the area that hosts the Great Barrier Reef in North Eastern Australia). We kept in touch and she and her friends informed there was a German Holiday that weekend (the one I ended up going there) and they wanted me to come visit. We had a blast in Australia and acutally met up on several locations while traveling up the coast. (Picture traveling from Orange County up the pacific coast highway to san franscico and seeing the same person more than once). I, not having anything better to do, decided to accept her offer. I figured since I was already in Europe, Germany couldnt be that far so I changed my flight from Rome to America and instead headed for Stuttgard. We met up, went to the festival and had a blast. I got home around midnight and wasnt tired at all. Of course, I logged onto fulltilt poker to see who was playing online. I found perkyshmerky sitting alone at 200/400 NL. I hit myself on the face to make sure I wasnt dreaming. I immediately sat and broke him for 50 - 100k; I cant remeber exactly. I just remember I won and he was tilted. He was always tilted. He challenged me to a heads up match live because he wanted to play me in person. I immediatly accepted. Now you should know that perky and I go way back. Although we had never met, we had been playing heads up online regularly for the last few months and I had beaten him out of a lot of money. I called Katrin (german girl) to tell her I wouldnt be seeing her anymore and I had to leave at once for important business. She didnt speak English all that well and that was all she needed to know. By this time it was 4 am and she was sleeping but I called her anyways to tell her. She seemed upset but too tired to care. I called expedia and booked a 9 am flight. I didnt even sleep. I checked my AIM and saw Durrrr online. I informed him at once of my plan. He told me he was on a layover in NYC (from his flight in Rome) and was heading home to Texas. I told him to skip the flight and come to NYC to join me. Having nothing better to do as well, he accepted almost immediately. He just stayed at airport, picked up his bags and got a hotel. I left for the airport, managed to use air miles to upgrade to 1st class and slept the entire way. When I got there I met up with Durrr and Z (urindanger on ftp) at the 60 Thompson hotel in Soho. Z - a fellow high stakes player online came to join in the matches as well. We were scheduled to play the following day. We all wanted equal time with him so we discussed plans to how we were going to do it. We agreed to play Perky Heads Up 200/400 nl with 100,000 in chips each. We would do $100,000 freezeouts (meaning each player put up 100k) and the winner gets the full 200,000. We decided to combine bankrolls (meaning put all our money together) and take %’s of each other during each match. We were set to play one of the biggest high stakes poker matches in history and we were all under 25. I was 20, durrrr was either 20 or had just turned 21 and idk how old Z was but definately no older than 24. Perky (also known locally as NYU Dave) was a known as a trust fund baby and his parents own large amounts of real estate in NJ. He was only 23. We barely slept, as we were all so excited for the match. My friend (whom I met online back in the old days of partypoker at 1/2 nl and we stayed in touch ever since) came to watch the match as well. Durrrr played the first match and after several hours of play, the following hand came up. Mind you that Z and I each had 25% of durrrr and he had 50% of himself. Everyone had the same deal meaning we all had 50% of ourselves and the other two had 25%.
With the blinds at 200/400 and Perky having 120k in chips (durrr 80k) perky raises to 3000. He sometimes makes these large raises for no apparent reason with any sort of hand. It can be totally random. Durrr calls w/ A9o and the flop comes 933 rainbow. Durrr leads for 4500 or so and perky raises to 15,000. Durrrr calls. The turn brings an Ace giving durrrr 2 pair. Durrrrr c/c (checks and then calls) a 25,000 bet from Perky. The river brings a complete blank (I think it was a 4) for a final board of 339 A 4. Durrr checks and calls All In for his last 50,000 or so. Perky showed 23 off and won the first match. Not exactly how we wanted to start things but we were still optimistic.
The next match I played him but we couldnt find a proper deck of cards. We counted two decks and they both had 51 cards. We sent our friend to the store but from the apartment it was at least a 15 minute wait. Perky and I were so anxious to play that we simply decided to play with only 51 cards. It wasn’t beneficial to either of us so we proceeded to start. I forgot how I won the first one but I busted him within thirty minutes. I played again and after six hours we were still even. At one point I had him down to 10,000 and he came back up to even. He had me down to 35,000 and I came back. We battled back and forth and back and forth but nothing progressed. He finally ended up busting me on a sick hand (though I think I could have folded) and I was back to even. Durrrr and Z played him several times after that in the days to come and they both lost everytime. I hung around in NYC for several days after that trying to organize another match w/ Perky. However, he refused to play me and would only play durrrrr and Z. He said I was too solid and one of the best he’s played. Although I dont think his opinion has the most weight, I was flattered. He turned out to be a really funny guy once you got to know him with a twisted sense of humor. Some of you are probably wondering how he got the name perkyshmerky. Well I found out immediatly after the first session. Upon busting him he went on tilt and started taking drugs. I asked what he was taking and he told me “why do you think they call me perkyshmerky.” “I have no idea.” “Cause Im addicted to perkasets.” (the pain killer thats stonger than vicodin). Shortly thereafter, I left NYC. Part of me was upset that I wasn’t coming home with a briefcase full of cash. He had promised to pay us in cash if we won, so the previous day I spent shopping around NYC at designer stores for large suitcases that I could fill with cash when I won. Kinda like the movies you know? I wanted to hear the clerk at the American Airlines counter say, “Sir, im afraid your bag is overweight can you please move some items to one of your other bags. Otherwise it will be an excess baggage charge of $25.” Ahhhhh, next time.

Some follow up: Perky would regularly borrow large sums (sometimes 100,000) from me and then lose it back to me while playing. He always paid me back. He was known as a big fish in the online poker world and regulars on FTP always wanted his action. However for some reason he loved playing me and Sbrugby. Ironically he probably was the only person to beat SB on a consistant basis and I was the only persons to beat Perky on a consistant basis. It was beautiful acutally. In the end I probably beat him out of close to a half million. We always made a point to trash talk after a big win. It was how we acted around each other. Whenever one of us won a pot we’d rub it in and trash talk for hours. It was all good fun I tell a story regularly about one of the sickest and funniest moments of my life. After our match in NYC I continued to play him online for several weeks. Shortly after buying my car (which I continually make fun of him for because I claim that he’s the reason I can afford it) we were playing a session of heads up NL online. During one of our matches the following hand came up. We were playing 300/600 NL and each had a little over $60,000 on the table.
Perky raised the button to 1800 (pot) and I called from the big blind w/ 33. THe flop came 843 rainbow and I checked. He bet pot which was 3600 and I made it 10,800. He called. The turn brought a Q and I bet around 17,600. He went All - In for another 30,000 (47,000 total) and I immediatly called. He had pocket J’s, meaning only the two remaining Jacks could save him. The pot was $125,000 and I was an overwhelming favorite to win. (22:1 or roughly 96%) Of course, a Jack hit on the river and he sccoped the pot. Seconds later my cell phone rings. Its perky. Before I could say hello he chimes in with that cocky tone he has, “How does a Jack on the River feel for your car?” I couldn’t help but laugh. To him, it was just a game. He could careless about the money, he just wanted to win and I respect that.

* Word spead of our games and before long Perky’s parents found out. They sent him to rehab where he currently spending 90 days. He recently asked me for $500 on FTP. I couldnt help but laugh.
* After winning $150,000 ($90,000 of which was my share) in three consecutive freezeouts online, I left that day for the BMW dealership where I paid cash for a 2007 M6 convertible. I sent Perky a pix message of my car from the dealership with a caption underneath that read, “TYPERKY.” Im customizing my liscense plate to say the same thing.
* Durrrr and Z are doing well, currently beating the highest games on FTP.

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This is a true story that took place in late June primarily in an apartment in Trump Towers (58th and 5th) in New York City.

Stuttgard. Its not in the glossary so dont bother. Most of you are probably thinking, “I never ate a Stuttgard.” Yea well that makes two of us. Thats because it is a city in God knows where Germany. And somehow, for two days in the middle of May, I found myself there. Lets go back in time a bit. I left Australia for Manila in early May with Mike (Pancakes as we call him) and Mark Vos. We split up however, as they headed for Prague and I went to Rome to meet up with Durrr and Alan Sans. From there they went home and I left for Germany. Now that you know the boring parts lets proceed. I had met a girl while traveling up the Gold Coast (the area that hosts the Great Barrier Reef in North Eastern Australia). We kept in touch and she and her friends informed there was a German Holiday that weekend (the one I ended up going there) and they wanted me to come visit. We had a blast in Australia and acutally met up on several locations while traveling up the coast. (Picture traveling from Orange County up the pacific coast highway to san franscico and seeing the same person more than once). I, not having anything better to do, decided to accept her offer. I figured since I was already in Europe, Germany couldnt be that far so I changed my flight from Rome to America and instead headed for Stuttgard. We met up, went to the festival and had a blast. I got home around midnight and wasnt tired at all. Of course, I logged onto fulltilt poker to see who was playing online. I found perkyshmerky sitting alone at 200/400 NL. I hit myself on the face to make sure I wasnt dreaming. I immediately sat and broke him for 50 - 100k; I cant remeber exactly. I just remember I won and he was tilted. He was always tilted. He challenged me to a heads up match live because he wanted to play me in person. I immediatly accepted. Now you should know that perky and I go way back. Although we had never met, we had been playing heads up online regularly for the last few months and I had beaten him out of a lot of money. I called Katrin (german girl) to tell her I wouldnt be seeing her anymore and I had to leave at once for important business. She didnt speak English all that well and that was all she needed to know. By this time it was 4 am and she was sleeping but I called her anyways to tell her. She seemed upset but too tired to care. I called expedia and booked a 9 am flight. I didnt even sleep. I checked my AIM and saw Durrrr online. I informed him at once of my plan. He told me he was on a layover in NYC (from his flight in Rome) and was heading home to Texas. I told him to skip the flight and come to NYC to join me. Having nothing better to do as well, he accepted almost immediately. He just stayed at airport, picked up his bags and got a hotel. I left for the airport, managed to use air miles to upgrade to 1st class and slept the entire way. When I got there I met up with Durrr and Z (urindanger on ftp) at the 60 Thompson hotel in Soho. Z - a fellow high stakes player online came to join in the matches as well. We were scheduled to play the following day. We all wanted equal time with him so we discussed plans to how we were going to do it. We agreed to play Perky Heads Up 200/400 nl with 100,000 in chips each. We would do $100,000 freezeouts (meaning each player put up 100k) and the winner gets the full 200,000. We decided to combine bankrolls (meaning put all our money together) and take %’s of each other during each match. We were set to play one of the biggest high stakes poker matches in history and we were all under 25. I was 20, durrrr was either 20 or had just turned 21 and idk how old Z was but definately no older than 24. Perky (also known locally as NYU Dave) was a known as a trust fund baby and his parents own large amounts of real estate in NJ. He was only 23. We barely slept, as we were all so excited for the match. My friend (whom I met online back in the old days of partypoker at 1/2 nl and we stayed in touch ever since) came to watch the match as well. Durrrr played the first match and after several hours of play, the following hand came up. Mind you that Z and I each had 25% of durrrr and he had 50% of himself. Everyone had the same deal meaning we all had 50% of ourselves and the other two had 25%.
With the blinds at 200/400 and Perky having 120k in chips (durrr 80k) perky raises to 3000. He sometimes makes these large raises for no apparent reason with any sort of hand. It can be totally random. Durrr calls w/ A9o and the flop comes 933 rainbow. Durrr leads for 4500 or so and perky raises to 15,000. Durrrr calls. The turn brings an Ace giving durrrr 2 pair. Durrrrr c/c (checks and then calls) a 25,000 bet from Perky. The river brings a complete blank (I think it was a 4) for a final board of 339 A 4. Durrr checks and calls All In for his last 50,000 or so. Perky showed 23 off and won the first match. Not exactly how we wanted to start things but we were still optimistic.
The next match I played him but we couldnt find a proper deck of cards. We counted two decks and they both had 51 cards. We sent our friend to the store but from the apartment it was at least a 15 minute wait. Perky and I were so anxious to play that we simply decided to play with only 51 cards. It wasn’t beneficial to either of us so we proceeded to start. I forgot how I won the first one but I busted him within thirty minutes. I played again and after six hours we were still even. At one point I had him down to 10,000 and he came back up to even. He had me down to 35,000 and I came back. We battled back and forth and back and forth but nothing progressed. He finally ended up busting me on a sick hand (though I think I could have folded) and I was back to even. Durrrr and Z played him several times after that in the days to come and they both lost everytime. I hung around in NYC for several days after that trying to organize another match w/ Perky. However, he refused to play me and would only play durrrrr and Z. He said I was too solid and one of the best he’s played. Although I dont think his opinion has the most weight, I was flattered. He turned out to be a really funny guy once you got to know him with a twisted sense of humor. Some of you are probably wondering how he got the name perkyshmerky. Well I found out immediatly after the first session. Upon busting him he went on tilt and started taking drugs. I asked what he was taking and he told me “why do you think they call me perkyshmerky.” “I have no idea.” “Cause Im addicted to perkasets.” (the pain killer thats stonger than vicodin). Shortly thereafter, I left NYC. Part of me was upset that I wasn’t coming home with a briefcase full of cash. He had promised to pay us in cash if we won, so the previous day I spent shopping around NYC at designer stores for large suitcases that I could fill with cash when I won. Kinda like the movies you know? I wanted to hear the clerk at the American Airlines counter say, “Sir, im afraid your bag is overweight can you please move some items to one of your other bags. Otherwise it will be an excess baggage charge of $25.” Ahhhhh, next time.

Some follow up: Perky would regularly borrow large sums (sometimes 100,000) from me and then lose it back to me while playing. He always paid me back. He was known as a big fish in the online poker world and regulars on FTP always wanted his action. However for some reason he loved playing me and Sbrugby. Ironically he probably was the only person to beat SB on a consistant basis and I was the only persons to beat Perky on a consistant basis. It was beautiful acutally. In the end I probably beat him out of close to a half million. We always made a point to trash talk after a big win. It was how we acted around each other. Whenever one of us won a pot we’d rub it in and trash talk for hours. It was all good fun I tell a story regularly about one of the sickest and funniest moments of my life. After our match in NYC I continued to play him online for several weeks. Shortly after buying my car (which I continually make fun of him for because I claim that he’s the reason I can afford it) we were playing a session of heads up NL online. During one of our matches the following hand came up. We were playing 300/600 NL and each had a little over $60,000 on the table.
Perky raised the button to 1800 (pot) and I called from the big blind w/ 33. THe flop came 843 rainbow and I checked. He bet pot which was 3600 and I made it 10,800. He called. The turn brought a Q and I bet around 17,600. He went All - In for another 30,000 (47,000 total) and I immediatly called. He had pocket J’s, meaning only the two remaining Jacks could save him. The pot was $125,000 and I was an overwhelming favorite to win. (22:1 or roughly 96%) Of course, a Jack hit on the river and he sccoped the pot. Seconds later my cell phone rings. Its perky. Before I could say hello he chimes in with that cocky tone he has, “How does a Jack on the River feel for your car?” I couldn’t help but laugh. To him, it was just a game. He could careless about the money, he just wanted to win and I respect that.

* Word spead of our games and before long Perky’s parents found out. They sent him to rehab where he currently spending 90 days. He recently asked me for $500 on FTP. I couldnt help but laugh.
* After winning $150,000 ($90,000 of which was my share) in three consecutive freezeouts online, I left that day for the BMW dealership where I paid cash for a 2007 M6 convertible. I sent Perky a pix message of my car from the dealership with a caption underneath that read, “TYPERKY.” Im customizing my liscense plate to say the same thing.
* Durrrr and Z are doing well, currently beating the highest games on FTP.

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4stars ben wb...the best thing I've ever read on 2p2