Beat: Just Found out my sister is my mom

[BooNaNy]

Why did they end up telling you? Ignorance is bliss... I have a nephew that thinks he's my cousin. He has no idea and I think I'm gonna keep it that way.

[CORed]

I think it's unfortunate that they didn't tell you the truth sooner, but your grandparents did the right thing by raising you. Raising you at her age with the father gone probably would have been more than your biological mother could have handled. I'm sure you're confused as hell now, but the revelation doesn't really change who your grandparents are, or who your biological mother is.

[Max Raker]

[ QUOTE ]
This whole situation is really crazy.


How do you feel overall? Have you had any trouble trusting people after finding this out?

[/ QUOTE ]

It has only been two days so I am not sure it has really sunk in. I don't think it will change me much since I can see logically why they lied to me and I really think they where acting in my best interest. As somebody said earlier it is more of a mind [censored] than anything else.

[mikecrooks]

Is your sister/mom hot. That would be hella cool to bang your mom and sister at the same time.

[Max Raker]

[ QUOTE ]
Why did they end up telling you? Ignorance is bliss... I have a nephew that thinks he's my cousin. He has no idea and I think I'm gonna keep it that way.

[/ QUOTE ]


I think they planned to never tell me but with the emotion of her mom dying my mom broke down and just told me. I could tell by my dad and sisters reaction that she had not told them she was going to tell me and I don't think she decide to until a few seconds before.

Looking back it might have been better if she planned it out but it was ok how it went down.

[Max Raker]

[ QUOTE ]
Why did they end up telling you? Ignorance is bliss... I have a nephew that thinks he's my cousin. He has no idea and I think I'm gonna keep it that way.

[/ QUOTE ]

If he still lives with the people who he thinks are his parents telling him would be bad in my opinion. The best case is that nothing happens and he is ok, the worst case is that it hurts him alot. I think if I found out when I was 15 or 16 it would have been alot harder. I am not sure how I feel on knowing vs not knowing as an adult. I am leaning towards knowing but am not sure. It depends alot on the individual I think.

[El_Hombre_Grande]

By the way, I know a family that is doing this right now to twins that are now 7 years old. They have an older "sister" that is their mom, and the woman they think is their mom is actually (biologically) their grandmother. Father is out of the picture and always has been.

Op, have you decided when you think you were "old enough" to be told the truth? Shoulf it have been from the get-go? (Leave the father-suicide thing out of it) I kid you not, I'm going to show your response to this mom and grandma duo, FWIW.

[minnesotasam]

OP sounds like a good guy who legitimately comes from a good family. Hope everything works out for you man.

Oh and one thing I've learned from my own family (lots of adoptions, including my biological sister who is 16 years older than me that my mom had at 17), is that genetics has very little to say about who your parents are. Don't feel the need to asterisk your parents; they're your mom and dad.

[Max Raker]

[ QUOTE ]
By the way, I know a family that is doing this right now to twins that are now 7 years old. They have an older "sister" that is their mom, and the woman they think is their mom is actually (biologically) their grandmother. Father is out of the picture and always has been.

Op, have you decided when you think you were "old enough" to be told the truth? Shoulf it have been from the get-go? (Leave the father-suicide thing out of it) I kid you not, I'm going to show your response to this mom and grandma duo, FWIW.

[/ QUOTE ]

If their situation is stable now I would say let it be for a while. Are they living with their biological mother? I think if they are or even if they see her alot now it would not be a good idea to tell them. When you are that young your life revolves around your parents, maybe some people with kids that age can also chime on how they would handle something like this.

I could imagine alot of fights where they could ask their grandparents for something and if they say know they can say well I am going to ask my "real" mom. Kids can often be cruel unintentionally when they want something and these sort of comments can really hurt.

I think "old enough" is probably after they move out and have settled into their own life for a bit. I moved out on my 18th birthday and have been financially independent for the most part since I was around 20. I think the earliest I could have gotten the truth and not have it have a huge impact would be around 21. As of now I feel like I am happy knowing and, over some time,will try to get to know my sister better if she is ready. I will always call her my her first name and still call my parents mom and dad.

I am not really sure how always knowing would have impacted me. I think it might not have been good to know during the teenage years as those can be tough even under the most ideal of conditions.

[Unoriginalname]

This thread just blew my mind a little bit.

Back when I was 21-22, I was dating a girl a year older than me that had parents that were in their mid to late 60's. She had siblings, including a couple sisters, ranging in age from mid 30's to early 40's. She always said she thought she was a mistake and her parents just had her a bit older. I assumed that was the case and never gave it a second thought at the time. Now this is making me wonder if she was actually in the same exact position as OP? I wonder if she might have lied to me out of embarrassment? Or maybe she didn't lie cause she never even knew? Maybe I should send her a text message telling her that her parents might not be who she thinks they are.