Casino Royale Review *No Spoilers*

[BiCuriousGeorge]

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The final hand of poker was so [censored] lame IMHO. As the hand played out it was soooo obvious what was going to happen.

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yes. although i'm sure most of the audience were thinking "OMFG NOTHING BEATS A FULL HOUSE"

i texted my friend during the movie "do you think he has poker tracker?" and i could hear him laughing in the back of the theater ( it was so crowded we had to sit on opposite sides ).

[Quadstriker]

This movie was a prime example of a film that on paper looked like it would be very good but failed to hit the mark.

C-

[Quadstriker]

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wow, I'm the only one who thought this movie was awful? Possible spoilers below:

-poker scenes sucked horribly
-007 and the other d-bag are slowrollers
-no cool gadgets, no q, barely any kills
-tons of ridiculous twists that make no sense
-stupid love scenes and bond is a vagina
-007 gets racked in the nuts 437 times in a row and he's cracking jokes? hell no.
-wtf is going on?
-movie is way too long
-dear god, i know its a bond flick and all, but why does every movie have to have ridiculous computer scenes? you can't zoom in 700000 times from outer space and check out what size of shoe someone is wearing.
-movie is boring as hell
-terribly predictable, nothing puts you on the edge of your seat

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This is right on the money.

[OrangeCat]

Nice review. I saw it Friday night and give it a thumbs up. IMO, within the top 6 or 7 Bond films ever.

While CR is about the early Bond, it is not really a prequel. At least, not in the sense Star Wars Ep 1 is a prequel.

To a bunch a poker junkies, of course the poker is going to seem lame. I was half expecting the villain to open up a box of Oreo cookies. But at least Bond is not a donkey. Besides, anything would have been better than baccarat.

CR did 14.75 mil on Friday, hardly a flop.

[[Phill]]

[ QUOTE ]
wow, I'm the only one who thought this movie was awful? Possible spoilers below:

-poker scenes sucked horribly
-007 and the other d-bag are slowrollers
-no cool gadgets, no q, barely any kills
-tons of ridiculous twists that make no sense
-stupid love scenes and bond is a vagina
-007 gets racked in the nuts 437 times in a row and he's cracking jokes? hell no.
-wtf is going on?
-movie is way too long
-dear god, i know its a bond flick and all, but why does every movie have to have ridiculous computer scenes? you can't zoom in 700000 times from outer space and check out what size of shoe someone is wearing.
-movie is boring as hell
-terribly predictable, nothing puts you on the edge of your seat

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- i agree the poker could have been better
- yes, thats why its a film and not real life
- the gadgets got stupid, less gadgets is a good thing. The origional Q died, and they cant really replace him, much as they tried (sorry, forget the actors name and dont have the time to look it up)
- there were virtually no love scenes. And what was in there made sense within the confines of the story
- ive got a feeling you missed exactly what is going on which is implied. The twists make perfect sense when you think through exactly the order of events known and implied.
- the torture scene is shocking to watch. The jokes bit is quite realistic as a coping measure and helps show the develop of bond into one hard bastard of a guy - he was never giving up the info. The joke was funny.
- yes, you obviously need to think the film through more. Half the story is only implied, you really need to bring your head to this film.
- i agree it coulda been shorter. But i dont mind a long film which is good.
- the sattalite GPS stuff was a bit stupid. But ive never used MI6 equipment so maybe it actually looks like that. My first thought at that scene was it simply looked fake.
- I disagree
- in what sense? A lot was predictable to a point, find me a movie that isnt.

[Phresh]

I'm not going word for word with you on this because I don't care enough, but nobody is cracking jokes after being hit in the nuts like that. I still writhe in pain just from thinking about it. What a gay torture scene.

And maybe I didn't bring my head to it, I didn't pay attention to many names, but I felt nearly all the twists were unnecessary and stupid. And should half of a story be implied? Really?

[ThaSaltCracka]

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I'm not going word for word with you on this because I don't care enough, but nobody is cracking jokes after being hit in the nuts like that

[/ QUOTE ] some people use humor or laughing as a way to cope with pain. There is no question that he is in great pain, but the way that he deals with it is what makes him a secret agent. Believe me, special forces in the US military go through intense training for dealing with torture and interrogation. Bond being able to deal with it is what makes him so special. FWIW, 99.99999999999% people would not act like Bond, ever.

[Fedorfan]

Very enjoyable bond film, i think the change of pace this movie brought was nice. I mean i enjoyed the lack of gadgets, lack of super evil bad guy trying to take over the world, which led to the story feeling fresh and not tired and overused.

Visually, i don't see how you can complain, the stunts/fight scenes and locations were awesome. I really liked how the fight scenes actually had bond struggling instead of flawlessly taking apart his enemy's, which gets old and feels so contrived.

Those saying bond didn't get laid enough, i think that's the point, this film shows the story of how he becomes such a cold womanizing badass... he had to get his heart broken once.

I do think it's lame as hell that Bond doesn't smoke! I mean cmon the guy says that he doesn't expect to live long, why the hell would he care about lung cancer and old age. Bunch of PC [censored].

[amplify]

The sequence with the freerunner was awesome.
The poker wasn't that bad, except for the final hand.

I may be slightly gay for Daniel Craig.

[Phresh]

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The poker wasn't that bad, except for the final hand.

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Every hand was awful. The string bets and wagering money/cars not on the table was ridiculous. The gay slowrolling. Every hand being a total cooler, nobody bluffing. Telling the guy you know what he has and his odds of hitting his hand, lol.


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I really liked how the fight scenes actually had bond struggling instead of flawlessly taking apart his enemy's, which gets old and feels so contrived.

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The entire scene on the airport runway was ridiculous. Bond and the guy driving the gas truck are just slapping eachother back and forth for an hour? The cops shoot out the tires on a LEAKING GAS TRUCK with a [censored] machine gun? Yeah, totally safe.


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some people use humor or laughing as a way to cope with pain

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And I'm saying that there are some things you can't giggle your way out of. Can you imagine someone being whipped in the back and someone laughs to deal with the pain? No, you'd pass out or something. Unless the M16 special agents training course included ways to deal with a poker playing chess prodigy villain smashing your testicles with a giant rope or whatever the [censored] that was.