Funny girlfriend quotes

[guids]

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Here's mine, she's adorable [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Elisa* says: I'll be over at 9, I can't believe my boyfriend still isn't on to us.. He just bought me a cute new pair of glasses, what a moron.

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Ouch! Is there a story to this?

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Read the OP, and read his gf's name, then read above again.


GFs suck, but here are a few from chicks I know, Im sure Ive posted these before:

Me: hey what are you doing later tonight
Her: dunno, whatsup?
Me: I was thinking about takign the top of the wrangler and taking a drive during the meteor shower wanna go?
Her: *confused, and yet somewhat angry look*...huh? why would you do that, wont we get wet?
Me: ...


Me: here, we are having a party next saturday, take a look (this was in 2000, as I handed her a flyer)
Her: huh? whats this? I understand what 2k is, but whats the Y mean in Y2k?

[Hopey]

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ex gf (after i didnt put it in her mouth when i finished, and it got on her face): if you ever miss the mouth again, im going to tear your balls off and shove them up your ass.

....we broke up soon after [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

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Nice brag post.

And why would you break up with this awesome chick?

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that was more of the joke part, we really broke up because of several other issues, such as her being a flaming whore and dropping her life for drinking lots of alcohol and hooking up with guys that she thought loved her, then used her, only for her to spend countless hours crying to her roomate about it. she'll die alone.

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this sounds a lot like my ex g/f, maybe they should hang out

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This sounds a lot like *everyone's* ex-girlfriend. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[TheBlueMonster]

Hmmm, are you friends with an Afro man? [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
Seriously, A-Dawg, when was the last time you had a girl who wouldn't let you ejaculate in her oral cavity?

[SlackerMcFly]

Wife: What's the date today?
Me: I dunno - look at the newspaper.
Wife: That's no help at all. It's yesterday's paper!

True story.

[man]

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Me: hey what are you doing later tonight
Her: dunno, whatsup?
Me: I was thinking about takign the top of the wrangler and taking a drive during the meteor shower wanna go?
Her: *confused, and yet somewhat angry look*...huh? why would you do that, wont we get wet?
Me: hell yeah we will! yeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwww!!! <slaps her on butt>

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FY... conversation?

[funkymunky]

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Wife: What's the date today?
Me: I dunno - look at the newspaper.
Wife: That's no help at all. It's yesterday's paper!

True story.

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Geez, from some of these posts, I hope these womens is hot!

[AMT]

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Wife: What's the date today?
Me: I dunno - look at the newspaper.
Wife: That's no help at all. It's yesterday's paper!

True story.

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slacka, your wife WOULD do that [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[spock86]

While filling a fish tank with water
gf: this fish needs to stop drinking so much water

[MikeyPatriot]

GF and I were at the St. Louis Children's Museum. Anyone who has ever been there definitely remembers the giant robot dinosaurs. GF and I are in the gift shop which has an open balcony overlooking the dinosaurs. Somehow, GF has her back turned to them and hasn't seen them.

Me: Hey, look behind you.

Her (with the enthusiasm of a child and the humor of Bedevere during the Cave seen in Monty Python): OOOooooOO! Dinosaurs!

[NT!]

An excerpt from the upcoming West Coast trip report:

Approaching Vegas from the north on US 93, passing by a bunch of identical subdivisions with breezy-sounding names.

Ms. Thumb: Do you think people coming home really drunk have a hard time finding their houses?

I bet I would.

NT