Never Trust Anyone

[Eponymous]

[ QUOTE ]
And the Grammy for best NVG Brandi Parady Song goes to ....



[ QUOTE ]
With apologies to the Beatles:


Yesterday ,
I was the poker world’s most wanted lay,
Now it looks as though I can’t get staked,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

Suddenly,
A wrinkled penis was bumping into me,
Then I used my hand on someone oily,
Right before I lost his 30K.

Pay my
Sit and go, and you know, you’ll have your way.
I post
Something dumb, now my bum is turned away.

Yesterday,
I cashed in 4 of the 6 games I played,
Now I have 43 dollars to my name,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

When he
Rubbed my back with his sack, I should have stayed.
I cried
Behind the door, now I’m a whore who can’t get paid.

Yesterday,
Huggling was such an easy game to play,
Now on a bathroom floor is where I lay,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

[/ QUOTE ]


LOL

PairTheBoard

[/ QUOTE ]

Thanks. It's a hopeful, optimistic song. I hope it can inspire someone.

[pokulator]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
And the Grammy for best NVG Brandi Parady Song goes to ....



[ QUOTE ]
With apologies to the Beatles:


Yesterday ,
I was the poker world’s most wanted lay,
Now it looks as though I can’t get staked,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

Suddenly,
A wrinkled penis was bumping into me,
Then I used my hand on someone oily,
Right before I lost his 30K.

Pay my
Sit and go, and you know, you’ll have your way.
I post
Something dumb, now my bum is turned away.

Yesterday,
I cashed in 4 of the 6 games I played,
Now I have 43 dollars to my name,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

When he
Rubbed my back with his sack, I should have stayed.
I cried
Behind the door, now I’m a whore who can’t get paid.

Yesterday,
Huggling was such an easy game to play,
Now on a bathroom floor is where I lay,
Oh, I believe I will fly one day.

[/ QUOTE ]


LOL

PairTheBoard

[/ QUOTE ]

Thanks. It's a hopeful, optimistic song. I hope it can inspire someone.

[/ QUOTE ]

it inspired me...classic

[EMc]

[ QUOTE ]
I was all rock n' roll in 85!

[/ QUOTE ]

No, you werent.

Quit while you are ahead (well, not hopelessly behind.)

[junglewarfare]

[ QUOTE ]
okay so sup bro has been really busy lately but sup bro was on 2+2 and saw a huge thread about some skank named brandi and sup bro thought that name sounded familiar. then sup bro realized that he had met some skank named brandi back in vegas and that it's probably the same skank. so here's the story: sup bro was at the bellagio playing some craps and he had about 8 groupies surrounding him cause sup bro was all county in 95 and vegas skanks can't resist living legends like sup bro. so it was a pretty normal night for sup bro and then some chick who sup bro had never seen before came up to sup bro and started rubbing against him and sht and said her name is brandi and asked if sup bro ever played football. a completely normal night for sup bro. so sup bro told her that he was all county in 95 and had 15 tackles for loss and of course this brandi skank got wet immediately after hearing that. brandi then grabbed sup bro and whispered into his ear and told him that she had a room at the bellagio and that she wanted to some really freaky sht like a$$ to mouth and some other stuff thats probably still illegal in many states. again, a pretty normal night for sup bro.

so although sup bro was already surrounded by 8 groupies who were a lot hotter than this brandi skank, sup bro thought he saw something special in brandi that meant he should go up to her room and show her whats its like to be f'ed by a legend who was all county in 95. so sup bro went up to brandi's room and she started telling sup bro how great she was at poker and that she was going to make a lot of money some day and sup bro told her to shut up cause sup bro didn't care. after hearing this btch talk about poker sup just wanted to get down to the a$$ to mouth so sup bro took off his shirt and started flexing his 20 inch guns and thrrew brandi on the bed and started ripping off her clothes. after noticing her very nice nipple piercings, sup bro started fingering brandi. this is where the story gets a little weird. as sup bro was fingering brandi, he felt something inside of her. at first sup bro thought it was just a tampon but then after further inspection sup bro realized that it was a used condom. although sup bro was impressed that this skank had actually made the last guy who f'ed her wear a condom, sup bro was disgusted at brandi's lack of vaginal hygiene. when brandi saw the look of disgust on sup bro's face she said, "don't worry sup bro I won't make you wear a condom." although sup bro was flattered by brandi's desire for some raw dog sup bro action, sup bro did not want any piece of that dirty pu$$y. but at this point sup bro had already wasted so much time with this skank that he did not want the encounter to be a total loss. so sup bro told brandi that she had had to blow him and shout sup bro as he came in her eye. so brandi blew sup bro and sup bro busted in brandi's eye. sup bro then began to put his pants on and brandi asked if sup bro would call him the next day. sup bro told her to shut up and that sup bro only calls btches when sup bro wants to call btchs. then brandi got really upset and grabbed sup bro's wallet and ran into the bathroom and locked herself in there. sup bro knocked on the door and told brandi to stop being a crazy btch but brandi screamed some sht about killing herself. sup bro didnt really care if she killed herself and just wanted his wallet back. so after a couple of mintues sup bro lined up like he did when he blitzed quarterbacks back in 95 and busted down the door. when sup bro got in there he saw brandi sitting on the toilet with cuts on her legs and "all county 95" written on the wall in blood. sup bro was really worried about what this crazy btch was going to do next so he just grabbed his wallet and got the hell out of there.

sup bro thought 2+2 might like to hear this story and sup bro has a lot of other stories that he might tell when he has time. for now sup bro's biggest concern is getting back on the football field and making tackles for loss cause sup bro is a living legend and legends never [censored] die bro.


sup bro?

[/ QUOTE ]

omgomgomgomgomg

[El Diablo]

All,

The main takeaway from all of this is that hizzle got very lucky that Brandi was a headcase, because otherwise she easily would have taken him for a few hundred thousand (or everything) instead of a measly 30k. Hopefully he learned his lesson and the next hotter, smarter, savvier chick won't get all his money.

[THEOSU]

the wreck of the brandi hawbaker:




the legend lives on from two plus two on down
of the player they call the newhizzle
the player, it's said, never gets any head
because his hair is so incredibly oily

with a full stocked account - 30k was the count
brandi hawbaker sat down at the computer
but our little girl blue was a bone to be chewed
when the online professionals viewed her

the girl was the pride of newhizzles eye
coming off four cashes in tourneys
as poker players go she was hotter than most
with breasts she flashed as she pleased

texting the pro brandi set down the phone
and opened a couple of tables
after getting stacked a couple of times
was it the bottle of wine she'd been feelin?

the minraise from the button made an obvious tell
and the button showed down the top set
and brandi then new, and the railbirds did too
twas time for brandi to rebuy

evening came late, dinner would wait
when the hero dropped a couple of buyins
so she shot off a text "i'm up real big, you bet!"
in the face of another bluff all in

by 10pm time brandi said "o my god"
and moved up to chase all her losses
at midnight mark called 'i'm still up' she bawled
as newhizzle's head spinned at his losses

when all was said and done and night turned to morn
brandi had dropped thirty dimes
newhizzle walked in, he tried to sign in
and tried his password several different times

it's a surprise brandi cried, newhizzle nearly died
when he found out she'd wiped his account out
so at that point he did what any man surely would
he took his dick and rubbed one out

brandi felt sorry, her eyes full of worry
so she got down and gave him a handjob
he finished on her face, we think that's the case
either way, the girl is a nutjob

the legend lives on from two plus two on down
of the player they call the newhizzle
the player, it's said, never gets any head
because his hair is so incredibly oily

[jah7_fsu1]

Another Sup Bro insta classic. Well played as usual sir!

[BluffTHIS!]

[ QUOTE ]
All,

The main takeaway from all of this is that hizzle got very lucky that Brandi was a headcase, because otherwise she easily would have taken him for a few hundred thousand (or everything) instead of a measly 30k. Hopefully he learned his lesson and the next hotter, smarter, savvier chick won't get all his money.

[/ QUOTE ]


El D,

Very wise words. hizzle's big head should take them to heart. But his little head might be an obstacle.

[Eponymous]

[ QUOTE ]
the wreck of the brandi hawbaker


[/ QUOTE ]

Awesome.

[Alfil]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I was all rock n' roll in 85!

[/ QUOTE ]

No, you werent.

Quit while you are ahead (well, not hopelessly behind.)

[/ QUOTE ]

A little Donnie and Marie inference too esoteric?