banging chicks from myspace.com

[snagglepuss]

nicely done. brian's ginormous mop is my favorite part.

bonus points would have been given if he had replaced the chips on the table with oreo's.

[john voight]

any strategy on banging old women? like 30-35yo. (Possibly up to 42 if hot) Im 20.
How do you spot them? What approach? What do they like in young kids etc...

thanks. this is my goal in life.

[john voight]

[ QUOTE ]
*** UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE ***

I HAVE A DATE WITH THIS 30 YEAR OLD FAT CHICK ON SUNDAY
SHE SAYS SHE LOVES GIVING HEAD
TRIP REPORT FORTHCOMING
HOLLA





[/ QUOTE ]

also, since this is what im aimimng for, do share trip report

[kipin]

Tuco,

I don't know you at all, but you are pretty much the coolest person I have never met.

[d10]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wow come on i was just going to say drop her and move on. she seems not at all interested and like she probably sucks.

[/ QUOTE ]

You're obviously not thinking like a male.

[/ QUOTE ]

no, i'm thinking like a woman who has acted similarly in email exchanges. i'm pretty sure a woman wrote this soooooo

[/ QUOTE ]

Interesting. Typically when I'm not interested in a myspace girl I just ignore her messages. Chicks are weird.

I'd still go a few more messages though. If I dropped every girl who started this way I don't think I'd ever get laid.

[SackUp]

I want to hear more about the lesbo action. That chick looks very attractive duck - good luck! send her my way if she changes teams.

Tuco - very, very nice. Brian dominates fatty poker

AHAHAHAHAHHhahahah

adding in oreos instead of chips is straight BIMO chuddo - you should add if possible tuco.

[Brian]

LOL. Thats fvking great, Tuco. Oh wow I love the "oversized mop" ahahahahaha.

Alright back to business, trip report time. I just got back from my first date (5:20 AM) w/ this girl:






We've been chatting on AIM for about a week and a half now. Last weekend I asked her if she wanted to meet up sometime this weekend, she said sure. She likes Hold'em/gambling so I suggested Tunica; we didn't set a specific date. A few days later, she said that she was going to go down to Tunica this weekend w/ her dad, and I immediately suggested that the 3 of us meet up for dinner. She has never met a guy off the internet before, and has expressed hesitation in the past, so I figured having her dad around would make her more comfortable. Since then, almost everyone I have told that dad would be along for the first date has said it's really weird... I suppose I've become so far detached from reality that it didn't seem weird to me at the time, but I was worried afterwards, so I sent her this:

[23:22] me: so would it be weird for our first date to be w/ your dad?
[23:22] her: haha.
[23:22] her: no i don't think so.
[23:22] me: k , [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
[23:23] her: he'll probably filter out during some part of the night.

Sounded fine to me.

They wound up getting a free room for two nights @ the Gold Strike. I got down there at 8:20 P.M., and was absolutely starving so I got a reservation for 3 for the buffet at Horseshoe for 9:15. I tried calling her at 8:30, no answer. Tried again at 9:00, she picked up and heres about how that convo went:

me: hey, where are u?
her: we got stuck in traffic, just got through checking in at gold strike
me: k, im starving, i got us reservations for 3 at the buffet in about 15 mins
her: thats sweet
me: so are u guys hungry? im starving
her: ...
me: confer w/ pa
her: pa u hungry?
pa: no
me: k well i'm gonna have to get something to eat, ya'll can come join me or we can just meet up later
her: i'll come meet up w/ you, pa is gonna go start gambling
me: k meet you outside in 15.

Ok this is already getting entirely too long/boring so I'll try to just give cliffs notes for the rest of the night. She met me at the buffet, I stuffed my face while she watched, kind of awkward but we kept the conversation up. Afterwards, she played some 3 Card Poker while I watched, she lost about 10 bucks. Then her dad called, so we drove to Bally's to meet him. At this point I began touching her a bit, arm around waist, hand on shoulder, etc. She didn't reciprocate and she didn't stop me, just was non responsive. This non-responsiveness would happen often throughout the night, but it may just be her personality, she's a bit of tomboy.

At Bally's her and her dad quickly lost a [censored] at some retarded game, uh I think it's called Deuces Hold'em or Deuces Down or something. Again I just watched, I couldn't bring myself to play. I told her I'd play Blackjack though, so we said bye to pa and went to find a Blackjack table. I had my hands all over her legs/shoulders/back/etc. while we were playing, again she didn't really respond positively or negatively, just let me do whatever. I broke even, she lost 45.

I told her I wanted to play Hold'em, so we went back to see pa and say bye, then headed back to the Horseshoe. She has never played Hold'em at a Casino so she said she was too nervous to play, so she just pulled up a chair behind me and we chatted while I played for about an hour. Some old man sitting beside me helped keep up the conversation, though the game certainly would've been more profitable if he had shut up. He was just talking to us but I'm pretty sure the whole table could hear him talking about EV, and he called a few people donkeys. Maybe he's a 2+2'er, I didn't ask.

She made a delicious cup of coffee while we were playing and shared about half of it w/ me, which was the first "positive" move she had made all night.

One of the dealers I had was an old friend who I hadn't seen in a few years, so we walked around w/ him and chatted for about 30 minutes. I had my arm around her the whole time, and occasionally when I would get deep into convo w/ him, she would pull me back over to her, which was the second positive move of the night. When we finished up it was about 3:00 A.M., so I asked her if she wanted to go to a nearby strip club. She seemed open to the idea but my friend advised against it for a few reasons, so we decided to just go back to my car and go from there.

In the car, we tried to come up w/ something to do. I offered to take her back to my place, she said "I don't know about all that... how about we go back to my hotel room, I don't think dad is home yet." Works for me.

Daddy wasn't home when we got back to the hotel room, so we got on the bed and started watching some T.V. The first position we were in, there was absolutely no accessibility for a kiss. She said she was uncomfortable tho, so I laid flat and told her to get comfortable. She put her head on my chest and laid next to me and watched T.V., again a hard position for a kiss. When a commercial came on, I rolled her off and asked her to find something else to watch, then said "actually im not at all interested in the T.V.", and went in for the kiss.

we wound up making out for about 10 minutes, w/ my hand going all over her. my first attempt was the boobs, which was successful. she lifted up her bra and let me suck on them a bit, very nice perky b cup types. i then tried to get down the pants but was denied both times, about the farthest i got was the tip of some pubes. we made out a bit more, i hopped on top of her and we did some dry humping. she wrapped her legs around my back and, well, [censored] it wouldve been some real good sex i bet.

eventually she got tired of making out tho (i didnt), and seemed more interested in the TV. she ran her fingers through my hair a bit, but about 90% of the touching was done by me.

[Quick Aside Regarding Daddy]: This girl has a tatoo between her shoulderblades that she claims her dad does not know about. She also says both of her parents think she is a virgin (shes been w/ 7 guys, 1 girl, and has had 2 3somes). She also wasn't able to get in touch with her dad, so she had no idea when/if he was coming back. I believe this is why I wasn't able to get any further, that and I don't think she is the type that gives it up on the first date.

Eventually dad called around 4:00 A.M. I said the night doesn't have to end here, we can go back to my place. Probably too eager but [censored] I'm sure most of you guys would say anything too to avoid being blueballed. I asked her a few times but she didn't respond (I was kissing her all over while asking), then eventually she said no.

She walked me out to my car, and I asked her if she wanted to hang out again tommorrow. She said something like "whatever.." and I said I'd just call her and see what she was up to, she said fine. Her dad pulled up right as I was leaving. I did the usual "nice to meet you", shake hands, he said the same, and he said he hopes to see me again.

For any tl;dr heres the <u>Cliff's Notes</u>:

1. Met internet chick.
2. Sucked her boobs.
3. Got blueballed.

-Brian

[Assani Fisher]

[ QUOTE ]
Okay so I have one chick in the bag even before actually meeting her. The only problem is she is [censored] batshit loco. I've talked to her for 2 days and she will definately sleep with me because she is incredibly horny, but apparently I have to be in a relationship with her? wtf? This is only the 2nd day talking to her and shes talking about relationship? Ughh, I knew it was too good to be true where I could just do it and go.

So should I pretend to be in a relationship with her for one night, hit it, SIIHP, and get rid of her? I'm afraid she may stalk/kill/chop of my nuts after.

Trip report probably in a week or two when she gets back from vacation and I meet her.

[/ QUOTE ]Do you want to be an [censored] or a nice guy? Its pretty much your decision....nothing we can give you advice on.

[snagglepuss]

'how bizarre. how fascinating.'

[buriedbeds]

Wow, there were 3 lead changes last night...first fslexcduck pulls ahead with the hot lesbian personal trainer prospects (initiated not by fslexcduck but by the hot personal trainer!), then Tuco grabbed the lead with his internet-ruling Fattypoker photoshop, and finally Brian regained his lead by sucking some fatty nips.

You're all winners in my eyes.

This is indeed the thread that keeps on giving.

-bb.