When In Doubt, Donk It! (NC Thread)

[Buzz-cp]

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wtf is wii? can anyone splain?

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wii#Name

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this is funny. my wife is explaining it to me now & she was literally 3 feet away when I posted!!!

[OziBattler]

Wook, well at least you were able make the best of the situation and grab some ass at the same time.....

[detruncate]

Congratulations man. Big doings. I've never been referred to as Master of anything. Well there was that one time... uhhh... never mind.

I was, however, called Chewie by my highschool sports team, so I get a bit of vicarious pleasure in seeing fellow wookies do well in life.

Peace out homie.

[gharp]

Every time I open a CD package I think "there must be a better way to seal these things". I've been thinking this for about 15 [censored] years now.

[Gib]

The way button played this cracked me up!!

PokerStars 2/4 Hold'em (5 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: 2+2 Forums)

Preflop: Hero is MP with 3[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img].
UTG calls, <font color="#666666">1 fold</font>, Button calls, SB completes, BB checks.

Flop: (4 SB) A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], 7[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(4 players)</font>
SB checks, BB checks, UTG checks, Button checks.

Turn: (2 BB) 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(4 players)</font>
SB checks, BB checks, UTG checks, Button checks.

River: (2 BB) 9[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(4 players)</font>
SB checks, BB checks, <font color="#CC3333">UTG bets</font>, Button calls, SB folds, BB folds.

Final Pot: 4 BB

Results below:
UTG has Jd 9c (two pair, nines and sevens).
Button has Ad 7s (full house, sevens full of aces).
Outcome: Button wins 4 BB.

[milesdyson]

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so here's what you do. you want to sell something on ebay. but you also want to have a laugh with your dudes. so when you're taking a picture of the thing you want to sell, you let your dong have a peek.

one time i sold a barrel for a paintball gun on ebay, and i left the tip of my manhood out there for all to see. some ebay member actually sent me a message:

"HEY! I SEE TWO BARRELS IN THAT PICTURE. ARE YOU SELLING BOTH OF THEM?"

here's how you do it:



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OMFG HILARIOUS

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ty for response. i urge everyone to do this and please post the link of your ebay item in this thread. or pm me. also, i wonder how many people have me on ignore.

[Gib]

This guy is total knob (yep I did have a read on him), but he was also a lucky one at that!

PokerStars 2/4 Hold'em (6 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: 2+2 Forums)

Preflop: Hero is UTG with T[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], T[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img].
<font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, <font color="#666666">3 folds</font>, SB calls, <font color="#CC3333">BB 3-bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero caps</font>, SB calls, BB calls.

Flop: (12 SB) 5[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], 3[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(3 players)</font>
SB checks, <font color="#CC3333">BB bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, SB calls, BB calls.

Turn: (9 BB) 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(3 players)</font>
SB checks, <font color="#CC3333">BB bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, SB folds, BB calls.

River: (13 BB) Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(2 players)</font>
<font color="#CC3333">BB bets</font>, Hero calls.

Final Pot: 15 BB

Results below:
BB has Qd Kd (two pair, queens and threes).
Hero has Tc Td (two pair, tens and threes).
Outcome: BB wins 15 BB.

then this:

Button is same knob as above hence my c/r, but what an awful river.

PokerStars 2/4 Hold'em (6 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: 2+2 Forums)

Preflop: Hero is SB with 3[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img], 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img].
<font color="#666666">2 folds</font>, CO calls, Button calls, Hero completes, <font color="#CC3333">BB raises</font>, CO calls, Button calls, Hero calls.

Flop: (8 SB) 2[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img], 2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], 4[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(4 players)</font>
Hero checks, BB checks, CO checks, <font color="#CC3333">Button bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, <font color="#CC3333">BB 3-bets</font>, CO folds, Button calls, Hero calls.

Turn: (7.50 BB) 3[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(3 players)</font>
Hero checks, <font color="#CC3333">BB bets</font>, Button calls, <font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, BB calls, Button calls.

River: (13.50 BB) 2[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(3 players)</font>
<font color="#CC3333">Hero bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">BB raises</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Button 3-bets</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero caps</font>, BB calls, Button calls.

Final Pot: 25.50 BB

Results below:
Hero has 3d 3s (full house, threes full of twos).
BB has Ad 2d (four of a kind, twos).
Button has 4s 8h (full house, twos full of fours).
Outcome: BB wins 25.50 BB.

[Gib]

This pretty much sums up how I'm going tonight

PokerStars 2/4 Hold'em (6 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: 2+2 Forums)

Preflop: Hero is MP with A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img], T[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img].
<font color="#666666">1 fold</font>, <font color="#CC3333">Hero raises</font>, <font color="#666666">1 fold</font>, Button calls, SB calls, <font color="#666666">1 fold</font>.

Flop: (7 SB) Q[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img], K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(3 players)</font>
SB checks, <font color="#CC3333">Hero bets</font>, Button calls, SB folds.

Turn: (4.50 BB) 8[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(2 players)</font>
<font color="#CC3333">Hero bets</font>, Button calls.

River: (6.50 BB) T[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] <font color="#0000FF">(2 players)</font>
Hero checks, <font color="#CC3333">Button bets</font>, Hero calls.

Final Pot: 8.50 BB

Results below:
Hero has As Td (straight, ace high).
Button has 9c 5c (flush, queen high).
Outcome: Button wins 8.50 BB.

Edit to add: lol just as I posted this I flopped trip tens but still managed to get beaten by a boat! Oh also just then JJ beaten by AQ this is starting to get riduclous, hang on I just had AJs oh well that just got beaten by a flush

[KingOtter]

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Last night it really started to resonate. My most serious poker issues aren't really poker issues. They're life issues.

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Hope everything turns out... be patient, pick your spots, play tight (in life as well as poker).

[Gib]

For the love of poker can I just start winning some hands!
Oh [censored], not again KQ flopped OESD had FD on turn hit my K on river only to be beaten by a straight as someone had Q9.

Edit: FFS! Flopped flush! but guess what another heart hit the river

I have just gone busto on one table because I never won a hand!!

I don't think I can take this crap any longer...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH! !!!!!!!!!!1

Can anyone say backdoor straight!