On Changing your Life

[adsman]

Yeah, I will, but if you guys shared as well it would be cool. I don't really want this to turn into, "A life of Ads Brag post". I'm knocking up chapter 2 as we speak though.

[kickpushcoast]

not long enough, did read

write the rest of the story, what kind of job you got, place you found, all that stuff

[fish2plus2]

This is my story I posted in another forum: http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showfl...0&fpart=all After the Ancardo thread I am pretty bored with life change and philosophy discussion.

I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

[wet work]

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I'm knocking up chapter 2 as we speak though.

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Don't do it you're too young for kids. Just kidding.

Looking forward to the next installment.

[cbloom]

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I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

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True. I find it a lot harder even with a girlfriend you're trying to maintain. It's definitely easiest to change your life if you just totally pull up roots and move, start over fresh, it feels a lot harder if you stay tied to something or stay in the same place.

[adsman]

I suppose that finding a place to live, getting a job and making friends aren’t really that simple. But they are the basic stuff that you need to do. I got myself a room in a dive of a hostel in Kings Cross, which is the red-light bar district of Sydney. Doing it in style. Finding a room was my first concern. Sydney is huge and I wanted to experience the inner-city life, so I narrowed my area down to the Eastern Suburbs. After a lot of calling I made an appointment with this dude who had his own apartment in Potts Point. Potts Point is right on the harbor. Beautiful location. It was a gothic-style apartment block out of the late twenties. The lift had a sliding door and a sliding cage with purple carpet on the walls. It was rad.

I had the interview with him and his girlfriend. I really wanted that place. Apparently about 50 other people wanted the room as well. Whenever I need something I act in my life like I already have it. Strangely enough this usually results in me getting what I need. I immediately went out to the flashiest department store in town and bought an expensive purple towel for my hoped-to-be room. Four days later I called him up. The room was mine. An empty room. With no bed. So I bought a bed, and some sheets and a blanket and pillow and paid the first two months rent and I had about $50 left in my pocket. But I had a place to stay. One step at a time. I also had two new friends – Jeremy and his girlfriend Kate.

I went out and walked from bar to bar until I had a job. It took me about three hours. I started that night. So I had the basics sorted out. Pity that I was emotionally crushed. But I had a new city to explore. I did a lot of walking. I love walking in new cities. Especially if they are pedestrian friendly as Sydney is. I wanted to make some more friends so I signed up to a little writing course. The course was crap, I ended up arguing with the teacher who was just absolutely crap. But I made a new friend. She was in her late forties and was also from Perth. She had also recently made the move across. She was reinventing herself after her kids moved out of home and she ditched her husband. She got me another job as well.

It was a job as a telemarketer for a new-age help guru who ran seminars on mind power and meditation. It was only for ten days and I absolutely hated it. But I resolved myself to do my best and I ended up selling something like 40 courses at $350 a pop over the phone. The guru dude offered me a full time job. I took it with one eye open for something better. The Friday after I started full time the flightly girl who took care of the desktop publishing quit in a huff. I found my boss in a bit of a panic and he explained the problem to me. I immediately told him that I knew heaps about desktop publishing and that I could do the job. Anything to get off those horrible phones. He was ecstatic. I got the job. I had until Monday to learn everything I could about desktop publishing on an Apple Powermac circa 1994.

Just about every job I’ve ever got I’ve lied in some way to get. Tell them what they want to hear. Figure it out as you go along. If you don’t know something, ask. If they quiz you on why you don’t know say that in the other job it was slightly different, blah blah blah. I read the manual back to front over the weekend and on Monday I waltzed in and hoped to hell that I could pull it off. There were some tight moments but I got the job done. I also had some new friends in the small office. We went out for drinks after work. I hoped I wouldn’t bump into my ex.
I play the guitar pretty well and I wanted to meet some muso’s, so I signed up for some advanced jazz guitar lessons at a little guitar shop. The teacher was good, I learnt some new stuff and I met a few cool musicians and we got a little jazz-funk band going. At the same time my boss asked me to help him on his tours. I became his personal assistant. We did weekends in Sydney, then one up in Newcastle. Then we did a week in Brisbane. Flying up, staying in a 5 star hotel, getting paid for it. It was all good. Then we did a two week trip to Cairns. Way up in the tropics. I fell in love with the town. I remember sitting at an outside cafè on the esplanade. I was drinking a coffee. A guy sat down and started talking to me. Just like that. Then a girl. Then another girl. Nobody knew each other. It was just so laid back and natural. I knew that this would have to be my next stop. We went back to Sydney and a few months later we did another trip to Cairns. That sealed it for me. We got back to Sydney and I put in my resignation. My boss wasn’t surprised. He said, “I knew I’d lose you sooner or later.” He gave me a bonus. I packed up my bike, gave away my bed and other stuff I’d collected and set off on the 4500km trip up to Cairns.

I replaced the chain on the bike before I left but not the chain ring. Very silly thing to do. In the middle of fecking nowhere the chain tore itself to pieces. And ripped the chain ring to shreds into the bargain. I hitched 800km back to Sydney. The bike was a write-off as I crashed it when the chain tore up. I was OK. Just a little shaken. A very good mate from Perth called me up two days after I got back to Sydney. He was in town. He had driven across to surprise me. Decided to do what I had done. I told him what had happened and that I was set on going to Cairns. That was cool with him, he’d come to Cairns too. So off we went in his little Suzuki Vitara.

When we got into Cairns around a week later we weren’t talking. Something about him not letting me choose any music on the stereo for the whole trip. He wanted to stay in a campsite out of town which meant that I would have been dependant on him for getting around. I told him to drop me off in the town and catcha later dude. I needed some time by myself. So here we go again. Checked into a nice little boarding house right on the beach. And proceeded to do it all over again. House, job and friends.

[skunkworks]

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I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

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This does sound interesting and I'd like to hear stories about this as well, but is this just another way of saying mid-life crisis?

[Dominic]

more please

[adsman]

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more please

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Will do tomorrow. It's bedtime now in Italy.

[fish2plus2]

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I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

[/ QUOTE ]
This does sound interesting and I'd like to hear stories about this as well, but is this just another way of saying mid-life crisis?

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Somebody picking up and moving to another place is interesting, but its not really hard. They just have to do it. I am wondering if someone has a cool story where they quit their job and opened their own business and were able to succeed, anything along those lines. I saw a cheesy family movie 'In America' recently which made me think about that.