Dear Bison: March 2006

[RJ!]

Bison, i have a 2nd question, i dunno if its allowed but im gonna do it.

i just graduated from college in december with 11843 dollars in my account. 10k of this was money left to me by my great aunt. i have since used the 1843 dollars and am now on my great aunts money. is it okay for me to use the money while i am looking for a potentially more high paying job? should i find a [censored] job to pay for living expenses while i look for a good job? i dont have to pay rent until i get a job through a deal i made with my landlord a long time ago. any suggestion as to how i should procede from here?

rj

[RayPowers]

Dear bogus account:

Maniac High's Pick Up Guide

Ray

[molitov bankroll]

[ QUOTE ]
Dear Bison,

I am suffering from the worst outbreak of canker sores in the history of mankind. At first I was extremely puzzled because I had never gotten a canker sore before, but now I don't care because I am pretty sure I am going to die.

I have got about half a dozen of these things all over the insides of my lips, they are each >1 cm in diameter, and they hurt a lot. I have also got about a dozen very tiny ones all over the tip and top of my tongue, they are each ~1 mm in diameter, and they also hurt a lot.

I haven't eaten solid food since Friday.

Until today, my lymph nodes were swollen to about the size of ping pong balls. Fortunately, in the last few hours they have gone down a lot.

I have no health insurance.

What do you think I should do?

[/ QUOTE ]

My friend had the same problem a while back. He went to the doctor and found out it was his toothpaste. There is some irritant in almost all toothpastes. I can't remember the name of the substance. All he had to do was use some herbal/crappy toothpaste and the problem went away.

[Burlap]

[ QUOTE ]
Dear bison,
Can you do this?



[/ QUOTE ]

Patrick,

You of all people should know better than to ask Bison such a silly question.

There are certain skills and qualifications one must first possess before even being considered for employment by Google, the first and foremost of which being Flaming Torpedo.



























<font color="white">_ </font>

[MoreWineII]

*gasp*

[Zoelef]

Dear Bison:

Not to be disrespectful, but whatever happened to the Google pen?

[Scotty.]

Burlap = Stuey?

Who else has this kind of photoshop/animation genius?

[Kramer.]

[ QUOTE ]
before you do anything, masturbate into a paper bag.

[/ QUOTE ]

This should be your answer for everything.

[Milo]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm having difficulty impregnating the wife (not due to lack of effort). Approaching the 3rd year of trying.

Aside from outsourcing, any suggestions?

Dear Casper,

See a fertility expert. There are a ton of reasons why couples have trouble conceiving, many of them requiring little more than several thousands of dollars to treat.

[/ QUOTE ]
Did that. Not a fun experience (surprisingly). Perhaps I'll post the trip report...

My guys are normal, nothing wrong with her either. Doc will be soon prescribing drugs for her.

Any other random thoughts? Food, timing, positions, etc.???

[/ QUOTE ]

Fertility drugs turned my wife into a bitch (something sh would attest to as well) every time she took them. Fortunately, she returned to normal after a few days.

[Joe Tall]

Dear Bison,

How is the pH determined for a solution of an amphiprotic substance?

Thank you,
Joe Tall