the most inappropriate thing you've ever said/heard

[Dan BRIGHT]

I probably have said worse, but I commented on how this baby in a woman's car was an ugly baby to a friend of mine while not realizing that her windows were down. She gave me a mean look. :/

[szw]

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this happened in a friends health class in high school (taught by a priest, by the way). he is discussing semen, and how it is mostly protien. a girl in the class then asks "well, then why does it taste so salty?"

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I'm sure it did.

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you are dumb.

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O RLY?

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yes, as the person who relayed the story to me graduated from high school in 1985. and actually the class was not health but rather some religion class, the name of which escapes me.

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This story was circulated around a lot during that time. It didn't happen to your friend.

[David H]

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this happened in a friends health class in high school (taught by a priest, by the way). he is discussing semen, and how it is mostly protien. a girl in the class then asks "well, then why does it taste so salty?"

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I'm sure it did.

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you are dumb.

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O RLY?

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jokes fly over your head much?

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You know, I did entertain the possibility that this first post was sarcastic. But, this IS OOT, so I figured he was probably serious.

[NA_kicker]

11th grade, forensics trip (I know, lame), eating at Wendy's.

The players:

Ms. Rich - Coach, I wouldn't bone her now, but with all the hormones flowing through me in high school, I'd give her 45 seconds of bliss numerous times.

Josh Gingrich - 9th grader with something to prove

Everyone else at the Wendy's table, including myself.

Ms. Rich walks behind Josh, everyone besides Josh sees her.

"Hey guys, I wonder how old Ms. Rich is?" - Josh
"Ugh, I don't know, why?" - everyone else (Ms. Rich looks puzzled)

"Let's say she is 28. Then after I [censored] her I could tell everyone I [censored] a 28 year old" - Josh

Josh laughs, everyone else tries not to laugh.
Ms. Rich taps Josh on the shoulder and removes him from the table.

Laughter at the table!!!

and scene.

[RichC.]

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me at strip club, to stripper on stage:
"Your mother must be very proud."

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her mother is the manager

[bwana devil]

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Or, as Granny so eloquently put it, loud enough for the entire restaurant to hear, "That half-monkey African n****r wouldn't open the door for me."

Nice to meet you too, Granny.

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A++ for story telling. you had me laughing hard on that one.

[Senator_Thack]

Mine tend to involve being drunk and deadpanning quietly to get a reaction from a friend. Examples:

Drunk in Vegas outside a club. See a guy in a wheelchair and say something about, "that's just how he rolls."

Walking down the street, see a young woman passing with a abnormal walk - the one you know is permanent, and looks like the hips and knees don't function properly. I can't help but say, "her boyfriend must be HUGE."

[Black Aces 518]

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youtalkfunny's poolroom story reminds me of a similar faux pas I made. A couple years ago I was doing an online fantasy football draft with a bunch of my friends and a couple other guys I didn't know (CJ and Desmond) who they invited. During the draft the subject of Jamal Lewis' drug arrest came up, and someone said something like "Ugh, why is he so stupid?" and I responded "Probably because he's black." There were a few seconds of "silence" in the chat and then one of my friends IMed me and said "Umm, CJ is black."

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Desmond isn't black???

Also, we had a fantasy draft a few years ago and it was down to the late rounds. Guy says "Anyone know anything about Willie Green, WR for Denver?" Someone says something like "x year player from x University". He says "Is he black?" "yes" "I'll take him."

[Black Aces 518]

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Most of this thread has been pretty weak.

I have a friend who was on a bus for thewith his mom. For the first time in his life he saw a black person. He just starts pointing at him screaming "look Mommy it's a monkey" over and over again.

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My niece did this in a grocery store.

[LrdNikon]

My buddy reminded me of what our microbiology professor said last week about bacteria:

"Bacteria have sensors for the environment. If something isn't right and the environment isn't optimal for their survival, they get the hell out...unlike Katrina victims."