Things your close ones has said that surprised/shocked you.

[MegaloMialo]

This evening i got rather shocked when my father told me with a face filled with sadness and contempt that someone had scratched his new car.
Before leaving he turned around and said "there is such evil in the world".
I have never before heard my father use the word evil in any context and this time he chose to use it when discussing the tragic events of our new car.
I honestly did not know whether to laugh or laugh. I did neither but remained blank.
I understand his sadness that someone would do such a pointless act to something he paid for and values.
But to use the word evil, in this case, considering the things that takes place on a daily basis around the world left me speechless.

[popeye18]

GF: Wanna try anal?

[Lonhro]

[ QUOTE ]
GF: Wanna try anal?

[/ QUOTE ]

Did it hurt when she stuck it in you?

[youtalkfunny]

I'm sixteen years old, and watching the Womens Finals from Wimbledon. My Dad is in the next room. All he hears is women grunting loudly, and Skin-imax hasn't been invented yet.

DAD: (enters living room) What the hell are you watching?

ME: Tennis.

DAD: Oh. (He stays and watches a point, probably the first tennis he's ever watched.) Who are these girls?

ME: Chris Evert and Martina Navratalova (this is the year Martina came out of the closet, something that simply wasn't done back then).

DAD: (after watching another point) Which one's Nav'talova?

ME: That one.

DAD: (checks her out) She eats pussy, you know.

ME: (way to shocked to respond, as my parents had never mentioned or even acknowledged sex to this point in my life)

[Yeti]

youtalk,

hahaha

[RayPowers]

Most unexpected thing my wife has ever said to me:

"I'm glad you started to play World of Warcraft again."

Ray

[VarlosZ]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm sixteen years old, and watching the Womens Finals from Wimbledon. My Dad is in the next room. All he hears is women grunting loudly, and Skin-imax hasn't been invented yet.

DAD: (enters living room) What the hell are you watching?

ME: Tennis.

DAD: Oh. (He stays and watches a point, probably the first tennis he's ever watched.) Who are these girls?

ME: Chris Evert and Martina Navratalova (this is the year Martina came out of the closet, something that simply wasn't done back then).

DAD: (after watching another point) Which one's Nav'talova?

ME: That one.

DAD: (checks her out) She eats pussy, you know.

ME: (way to shocked to respond, as my parents had never mentioned or even acknowledged sex to this point in my life)

[/ QUOTE ]

Hahahahahaha!

Winner.

[calmB4storm]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm sixteen years old, and watching the Womens Finals from Wimbledon. My Dad is in the next room. All he hears is women grunting loudly, and Skin-imax hasn't been invented yet.

DAD: (enters living room) What the hell are you watching?

ME: Tennis.

DAD: Oh. (He stays and watches a point, probably the first tennis he's ever watched.) Who are these girls?

ME: Chris Evert and Martina Navratalova (this is the year Martina came out of the closet, something that simply wasn't done back then).

DAD: (after watching another point) Which one's Nav'talova?

ME: That one.

DAD: (checks her out) She eats pussy, you know.

ME: (way to shocked to respond, as my parents had never mentioned or even acknowledged sex to this point in my life)

[/ QUOTE ]

I swear, every one of your posts is brilliant!

[findingneema]

When I was a senior in high school, visiting Vanderbilt (where I ended up going):

Dad: Boy, there are some ugly mamas here.
Me: Actually, dad, I think the girls here look pretty cute.
Dad: I was talking about their moms.

[AlexM]

If someone intentionally scratched his car, that certainly qualifies as evil by my book. Admittedly, there are much worse things to be getting upset about that happen every day. All this really says though is that your father is a pretty self-centered.