banging chicks from myspace.com

[His Boy Elroy]

Weaksauce. She should've held out to give one final BJ.

[bdohaney]

[ QUOTE ]
I was hoping to meet up with the suicide attempt girl i posted about before, but she didn't message me all day today and has most likely offed herself.

[/ QUOTE ]

LMAO nice post.

[IggyWH]

[ QUOTE ]
*** UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE ***

I HAVE A DATE WITH THIS 30 YEAR OLD FAT CHICK ON SUNDAY
SHE SAYS SHE LOVES GIVING HEAD
TRIP REPORT FORTHCOMING
HOLLA



[/ QUOTE ]

Are you asian? For some reason I read this in an asian voice and it made it 10 times funnier.

[miajag]

Nah, Jewy Jew through and through.

[IggyWH]

[ QUOTE ]
Nah, Jewy Jew through and through.

[/ QUOTE ]

Hold on, let me read it again in a "Jewy Jew" voice...

Even freakin better. Of course, I'm picturing you with a Jew Fro and that might be why I;m laughing.

[miajag]

Can we talk less about my religious/ethnic background and more about how I'm hooking up with a 30 year old this weekend?

[Vehn]

is this a good or a bad thing?

[miajag]

[ QUOTE ]
is this a good or a bad thing?

[/ QUOTE ]

As I said, trip report forthcoming.

[IggyWH]

[ QUOTE ]
is this a good or a bad thing?

[/ QUOTE ]

It depends if you can overlook that a fatty is slobbin on the knob. It's a proven fact that fat chicks can suck a good peepee though.

[Brian]

K, just back from date #2 with:




We met up for Ice Cream (I know fat chicks like the back of my hand, and many of them know the back of my hand very well, too btw), Frozen Custard to be exact, then went to The Night Listener (terrible btw). We were a bit flirty in the movie, nothing too big, then made out a bit in my car. Then shes like, "yeah, not too big on the making out in the car thing". Wtf? Who doesnt make out in the car? So I drive her back over to her car, and she leans in to kiss some more. She's like, keep it G-Rated (there were some kids @ work across the street prolly watching), I'm like, let's take it back to my place for some R-Rated. She then reminds me no sex EVER, then she apologizes. I'm like, eh whatever. Then immediately after apologizing, she says, "No, I'm not sorry. It's just the way I am. And the right guy will respect that." So yeah, severing all ties immediately; I was barely able to put up with the whole church thing just to get laid, certainly not doing it for a case of the blue balls.

I still haven't gotten any advice on what to do about the probable 17 year old I'm seeing tomorrow. OOT, I need your legal expertise!

Here's one that looks promising, but by looks promising I am obviously not talking about her physical attractiveness:



JERRY
She had Man hands.

ELAINE
[pause] Man, Hands?

JERRY
The hands of a man. It's like a creature out of Greek Mythology, I mean, she was like part woman, part horrible beast.

ELAINE
[weary] {Look,} would you, prefer it, if she had, no hands at all?

JERRY
Would she have hooks?


Beware the boobs only pics boys (of course the man hands gave it away in this one), cause the face will often look like this:



Damn, even hair in the face, head tilted good angle doesnt make her attractive. Ah well, as long as she doesn't crush my pecker with those claws. As usual, bottom to top:

Date: Aug 9, 2006 6:17 PM Flag spam/abuse [ ? ]
Subject RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: ?
Body: aww thanks...so do you go to memphis? or do you work?


crystal


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Aug 9, 2006 4:43 PM

That's cool. Hope you have a good school year!

-Brian


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: xxx
Date: Aug 9, 2006 3:37 PM

lol i wanna teach probably 3rd 4th or 5th grade


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Aug 9, 2006 2:00 PM

Just checking. I see you're an Education major at UofM, what grades do you want to teach?

-Brian



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: xxx
Date: Aug 9, 2006 11:19 AM

nope why lol



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: Brian
Date: Aug 8, 2006 11:35 PM

are you a myspace tease?



Again, not sure if I employed the "push" tactic correctly, but certainly seemed to work. I also have no idea how to follow-up the "are you a myspace tease?" line. AIM should be forthcoming.

BTW, which one of you sick bastards made me Enchanted Dreams, wowwwwwwwww... I am forever tainted.

-Brian

[EDIT]: Btw, I am also very jealous of miajag81. How many freakin' e-mails did you send out before you landed the 30 y/o? I must have sent out 300 or more so far, and the best I have gotten is a one time lay from a 5 w/ a kid who doesn't ever return phone calls and blue balls from a religious nut 4.

P.S. Stay-Puft just posted this Bulletin:

From Date Bulletin
xxx Aug 9
9:20 PM Im a Boyish Alcoholic Who Will Do Anything For Crack