The Power of Prayer

[Ron Burgundy]

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I suggest that we all pray together for the reversal of the evil events that have befallen online poker in the last couple of days. By pooling our energies and intentions during one moment in time, perhaps we can trigger forces in the universe that would create unexpected changes that would shift the winds of fate back in our favor.

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There's no doubt that getting God on your side can defeat evil. Just ask Bin Laden, or George Bush.

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On October 4, at exactly 5 p.m. pacific standard time, let us all hold hands (note: since we can't physically hold hands, we can just hold our mouse with our left hands and at the same time put our right hands over our hearts), and with great faith pray to the Creator for some favorable happenings that would stop the tide of evility that has befallen all of us. We don't have to know what specific events would occur. Just that they would occur and that no one would get hurt in the process. Not even the perpetuators of the dastardly deeds.

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How about this: we hold our mice in our right hands to play poker. We put our left hands on our c0cks and beat off to Tawny Roberts getting Fristed.

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Not even the perpetuators of the dastardly deeds.

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Are you Geraldo Rivera?