When you have a daughter....

[daveymck]

4_2

It definatley seems the way of it these days as I said my stepson is 13 and he has somthing like 150 contacts on his msn and is on there chatting to his mates, schoolfriends and some people he has met via friends in all his free time. They seem to message rather than ring each other so make arrangements etc on there. It does eem to have replaced the phone as the main teen communication medium.

He comes in from school goes on and all you see is all the kids popping up as they rush home and get online.

I have given him warnings about the potential for dodgy people and not being who they say they are etc, and at the moment we do monitor his logs (for our own piece of mind) but I will prob drop that shortly as there aint much going on there.

Most converastions revolve about being bored and talking crap for hours on end in bizarre text speak.

I am pretty open about the internet and email my daughter at 6 has a hotmail account so she can messenger me while I work away and also email her friend who has moved to Dubai (ovbiously I am the only one in her contact list). There are risks of course in letting her have open internet access but I balance that with what I think is the need to become computer literate and aware of stranger danger in all its forms. I was very proud the other week when I got my first email off my daughter she had worked out how to do it herself without being taught by me.

I can see what you are saying but AIM does seem to be a replacement for spending hours on the phone for teens these days.

[spamuell]

[ QUOTE ]
Another thought. When I get my daughter a cell phone (probably for her 13th B-day) it will not have a text message feature. 13-17 year olds do not "need" to text each other. They can use the phone or exchange email if they "need" to communicate.

[/ QUOTE ]

Why not just tape up her mouth? 13-17 year old girls do not "need" to talk to each other, if it's imperative that she communicates then she can write a message on a piece of paper.

Look, of course it's not absolutely necessary for your teenage daughter to use text messaging/IM, but you would be cutting her off from an enormous amount of socialising with her peers if you prevented her from using them, it's far too over-protective.

[Elevens]

My daughter is not quite 6 months old yet, and I've already begun thinking of this. I'm not looking forward to it.

[4_2_it]

davey,

I see your point and can see where if monitored, it would not be a big deal. The key thing is that when your teenager knows why (and not just how) you feel the way you do, they are more accepting of parental direction.

I'm sure your stepson knows what the punishment is if he caught visiting inappropriate websites or abusing AIM. That's the key. Kids need boundaries. If parents do not provide them, then the kids will have a free reign which is not healthy.

I would be interested to hear what milo and chesspain have to offer to this conversation. I am no child psychologist, I am only a parent doing what I think is best.

BTW - I think it is awesome that your daughter sends you emails. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[spamuell]

I think it's a pretty big deal to monitor the content of your teenage children's conversations with their friends. Monitoring who they're talking to or which websites they're looking at is different.

To be honest, I expect my teenagers to be savvy enough to stop me from seeing they've been looking at anything they don't want me to see.

[slickpoppa]

Just accept the fact that your daughter is gonna suck d1ck and have sex before she is married. The more overprotective you are, the more she will want to lash out at you and be a [censored].

[Shajen]

OOinsight,

I do not have a daughter, but I can only hope that if I do, I will be a good enough father that her decisions on who she dates will be in line with what I wish for her.

I used to say I would threaten bodily harm, but as I get older, I realize all you can do set the best example you can and hope they follow. If they don't, well, dating will probably be the least of your worries.

[Glo]

[ QUOTE ]
I would definetly like to have a son first. My teenage sister just got her first b/f. This guy damn well better be showing her respect, and he should be a lot more worried about me than my dad.

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LOL, good luck with that. I wanted my first born to be a boy. Was I surprised that after the delivery I had a daughter, nah, I expected it.

[eviljeff]

[ QUOTE ]
First, my plan is stay involved in their lives

[/ QUOTE ]

you sly bastard

[KaneKungFu123]

just think about some guy busting a nut on her face, or [censored] her from behind and pulling her hair, the way your dad did to your mom.