Some Stuff About PUA (very long)

[guids]

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That's nice, Chudster. I saw Olivia the other day; she's lookin' foooooooooooine.

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On that note, snaggle is right on. You said a lot abotu how you have sick conversational skills. The simple fact is most people would rather not listen to some other stranger actually "talk". People want strangers to listen, and they want friends that they can go back and forth w/, but no one likes conversations unless you KNOW they like to have a conversation. good friends can have convos, strangers can not. Personally, I dont say too much, I listen, and I use people to learn about people, 99% of the time, Im genuinely interested in others, especially women, if for no other reason is that talking to someone is like reading a text book on how minds work.

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Okay I'm gonna address this.

I don't know quite how to describe this process, but I think some of you are gonna nod and say 'yeah, exactly' and others will have little idea of what I'm talking about.

I find interest in other people - girls, dudes, kids, milkmen, old fogies at the park, whatever - to be very difficult to consciously manufacture. For me it's like a light switch. I have to notice something to set me off - some detail that seems interesting, something I can comment on or point out or give me a fresh angle to approach them from. With that in hand I usually just start talking and everything works out fine. Without it I have nothing to say at all. It's a completely binary, on-off thing. It's like people are invisible to me unless I already know something specific about them.

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I get you. And yes it is easier to approach people when you notice something, but thats not how I think. Everywhere I go, I check out pretty much everyone in the place, Im hyper aware/adhd if Im sitting there, so I check everything out, see if anyone looks familiar, see who is good looking, see who looks like they have money, see who is laughing the hardest, who is drunk, etc. You either notice stuff or you dont, I notice everything and figure out which dynamic is the one I want to get in on. when I find out who i think I want to get to know/approach THEN Ill look for something a little more familiar/detail that I can start teh convo with (a jacket, hair style, watch etC). This also makes me more approachable as most of the time I have people comming up to me for random things, because I can pattern my behavior after them, and act aloof, which will make them think that Im "cool" or whatever.

[Anacardo]

Guids,

You have first-rate tactical intelligence. I do not. Rulz2bu, though.

[El Diablo]

Cardo,

"Diablo,

I'm afraid I don't really see the resemblance."

Uh, how on earth could you have any idea? You don't know me or any of my friends.

"He's chill, laid-back, a little self-deprecating but clearly doesn't sweat [censored] or take himself too seriously. He seems like he really appreciates his woman and doesn't look on her as the just reward of a lifetime of mad pimping or anything."

That's how I would describe just about everyone I hang out with on a regular basis, including 2+2ers I've met and hung out with a fair amount like Matty, James, Paluka, beetz, Boris, and a few others.

That's also pretty much how "balla/playa" guys like chuddo, durrrr, and raptor (all of whom who I just met briefly on a recent Vegas trip) come off for the most part in person.

I feel like you have a pretty warped sense of how people actually are in real-life based on 2+2 and AIM interactions. The fact that you consider someone as you described to be some incredibly special type of person in terms of how they carry themselves imo says more about your perception of others than anything else.

[Dids]

"I find interest in other people - girls, dudes, kids, milkmen, old fogies at the park, whatever - to be very difficult to consciously manufacture. For me it's like a light switch. I have to notice something to set me off - some detail that seems interesting, something I can comment on or point out or give me a fresh angle to approach them from. With that in hand I usually just start talking and everything works out fine. Without it I have nothing to say at all. It's a completely binary, on-off thing. It's like people are invisible to me unless I already know something specific about them."

And you think this has nothing to do with any of the points Chuddo made about narcissism whatsoever?

[guids]

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Guids,

You have first-rate tactical intelligence. I do not. Rulz2bu, though.

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The thing is though, you can learn it, I did, i used to be pretty binary liek yourself, Id see 1 chick in teh bar that I just noticed above all others because of her hair/eyes/[censored] etc, and would focus solely on her, I would approach her etc, but I was going in blind. I later learned how to not go in so "blind".


also:
"Better to keep your mouth closed and be thought a fool than to open it and remove all doubt"

[Anacardo]

I didn't say 'incredibly special,' I said he was a representative example of what I admire.

You, on the other hand, and maybe this is just how you rock the interweb, seem, as I may have mentioned before, pretty arrogant.

[Anacardo]

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"I find interest in other people - girls, dudes, kids, milkmen, old fogies at the park, whatever - to be very difficult to consciously manufacture. For me it's like a light switch. I have to notice something to set me off - some detail that seems interesting, something I can comment on or point out or give me a fresh angle to approach them from. With that in hand I usually just start talking and everything works out fine. Without it I have nothing to say at all. It's a completely binary, on-off thing. It's like people are invisible to me unless I already know something specific about them."

And you think this has nothing to do with any of the points Chuddo made about narcissism whatsoever?

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Will you PLEASE stalk someone else.

[traz]

This thread needs to be renamed. Possibly to "Flame Anacardo for being an emo antisocial bastard"

[Dids]

Sweet, we've escalated to the "stalking" accusation. 'Cause clearly I'm focused on you and never ever spend way too much time posting in OOT in non Cardo threads.

Are you going to answer the question?

[El Diablo]

Cardo,

"I didn't say 'incredibly special,' I said he was a representative example of what I admire."

Maybe my reading comprehension sucks, but what I got out of your posts was that people of that nature that you admire are few and far between.

"You, on the other hand, and maybe this is just how you rock the interweb, seem, as I may have mentioned before, pretty arrogant."

It's ironic that I bet if you were to survey people who hang out with each of us, I bet the concensus would be that I have more humility than you.