Found out my roomate's GF used to be a mega-ho

[octop]

being good in bed means shes had lots of sex- it doesnt automatically mean its with a lot of people so he might not know

[MyTurn2Raise]

have you ever seen 'Chasing Amy'?

stfu and grow up

be happy your buddy might be with a girl that knows what she is doing

[selurah]

Mind your own business and let this die. I have a feeling he prolly already knows anyway. Absolutely nothing good is gonna come from this if you tell him.

[jschaud]

you got to tell him. he will hate you when you do, but later on he would rather know.

[ddubois]

[ QUOTE ]
Pull here aside sometime and tell her that there are some "nasty rumours" going around about her and her sexual escapades in the past. Tell her that you have heard it from a few sources now and it may make it back to your buddy in the future (but not from you). Tell her she may want to "prepare" him in case these rumours make it back to him. Just go about it in such a way that she understands you aren't judging her but should let your buddy in on it.

[/ QUOTE ]
I agree with this. But don't say 'nasty rumors', because that implies the stories would be somehow damning if true. You want it to sound like no one should care what she did in the past, and that who she is now is what matters - which is true. But also that it's best for the relationship if she comes clean, no pun intended.

[Gobias Ind.]

[ QUOTE ]
If he is a good friend, I don't see how not telling him could even be an option. If he is not a good friend, or if he pisses you off along the way, get drunk, then call him, on there 1 year marriage anniversary.

[/ QUOTE ]

Exactly. I honestly believe you should bring it up w/ her first and more or less force her into being the one to tell him. If she refuses, it is your duty as a close friend. Many on this board will say, "let it be," but what happens if they do get married and then divorced a year later due to infidelity? You're going to have to live w/ it on your conscience that the signs were on the wall, unbeknownced to your friend. You could've saved him some long term grief, but instead chose to keep your mouth shut to prevent rocking the boat.

[SammyKid11]

Hit. Film. Show Joe. End of problem.

[Equidae]

be happy your buddy might be with a girl that knows what she is doing

awesome

[IronDragon1]

[ QUOTE ]
My roommate, Joe, is a very monogamous guy. In his lifetime he has had 3, currently on his third, stable long-term relationships. He has done very little hooking up when not in one of these relationships. He looks down on slutty behavior.

Joe has been seriously dating this girl, Maria, for almost 3 years. In this time Maria has presented herself as a virtuous and high-class woman. She has denounced the slutty behavior of a few of her friends and made comments about how she would never have a threesome. Joe plans on asking Maria to marry him soon. I have never had any reason to suspect infidelity in the relationship and they are very close. I am happy for them.

So, this weekend I run into an acquaintance who knew Maria before Joe or I ever met her. With a sly look on his face he asks me how Joe and Maria are doing. I ask him why he is interested. He is drunk and proceeds to detail the prolific sexual exploits of Maria prior to her meeting Joe. This acquintance is in a local band and is also tight with several other local bands. This group of guys used to call her the "BJ Queen" as she fellated most of them and f'd almost as many. He goes on to recount tales of double teams and multiple guys in the same night. All of this taking place over a period of about one year.

At that point I did not know whether to believe him or if he was just making up stories. Later I met up with two other friends of mine, both girls, who knew Maria during the time period of the alleged exploits. They confirmed the stories almost exactly. They estimated that during this time period Maria banged roughly 20-25 guys .

All this info has made me sick to my stomach. I feel like Maria has misrepresented herself to Joe and others. I know that if Joe knew this info he would be devastated. Intellectually I know that this should not matter and she has been a good GF to Joe. However, my gut reaction is to be appalled. I don't know how I will look Maria in the eye again.

I wish I could unlearn this info. Please OOT help me feel better about this. Any comments or suggestions are most welcome.

[/ QUOTE ]

Those are some pretty traditional values there.

Also be glad for your friend that he is with someone who knows what they're doing sexually and do not reveal this information to him if it will affect their relationship-and it obviously most certainly would.

[xx44]

There is one consolation. If your buddy becomes much more successful than you, youll always have the satisfaction knowing that his wife was ankels to ears with the band.