[Borodog]

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Get another cat. That will make the first cat jealous.

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My ex-girlfriend has a little white kitten that has turned up on her doorstep. She came around today to offer it to me. I haven't seen it yet. The problem here is that if this plan succeeded I would then have two cats. I don't want two cats. A single guy with two cats just screams ..... well I don't know what it screams but it screams something.

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A HA! So you admit the poor old spinsters have not, in fact, stolen your cat. For if they had indeed stolen your cat, acquiring a new cat would leave you with one cat, and not two.

The defense rests.

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The plan was that the second cat would make the first cat jealous, thus attracting him back but leaving me with the unwanted outcome of having two cats. Is this so hard? Why do I feel that I'm in some kind of nightmare here? I'm going to go and try and wake myself up.

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New Plan:

1. Acquire New Cat to Make Old Cat Jealous
2. Old Cat Comes Home
3. Give Old Biddies New Cat