Re: worst sexual experience you\'ve ever had
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my worst experience is when i meet a random townie girl in a bar in new haven (SHE introduced herself to ME btw, this is important for the story)... she was pretty [censored] stupid and i now have a policy against stupid girls but i didn't then and she was sort of cute (not cute enough but i was wasted). we're dancing, start making out in bar, etc. i'm pretty drunk and so is she, so her friend drives us back to her place and i have no idea where it is.
anyway fast forward to we're in bed, i basically [censored] her, go to town on her, etc... she gets off. then does the standard roll over i guess talk for a couple minutes before going at it again (read: MY turn to get off) when she says "you know i've only slept with a girl once and i didn't really like it." so i'm like uhhhh ok but now you do? anyway she tells me a bit about it blah blah blah and then just goes to sleep. so i'm like ok wtf this is horrible and awkward. after like an hour of lying awake praying she doesn't wake up too, i go to sleep too and then wake up at 5am when she gets up to go sleep on the couch. i wake up again at like 8am, sneak out of the house through the back window, figure out where the [censored] i am, and walk the 6 miles or so back to campus with a retardedly bad hangover.
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I hooked up with this lesbian girl 4 yeara go, but we didn't have any condoms, so I just went down on her. Afterwards, she tried to get away without worshipping my [censored]. nonono nice try honey. Be aggressive. B E aggressive.
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great success!
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