Re: Pregnant GF
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So with no evidence whatsoever that the girl did anything wrong, you're going to condemn her?
You're 22. So am I, but you're showing just how naive you actually are with those comments.
1) The pill is, at BEST, 99% effective. Things still happen.
2) Had OP been smart enough to wrap it up understanding said small chance, this would have been even LESS of a potential problem.
3) The girl lied? Bulls***. Lying implies that it was never her intention. Not to mention, nowhere had it ever been SET that they would abort. Just the discussion had taken place.
The OP hasn't said much since he started this firestorm, but to the girl's credit, she's not trying to run away from a situation that is partially of her doing. OP is, and in my book, that makes him a coward.
He still hasn't responded with any good reason of what would be so bad about working a 9-to-5 for steady income and playing poker part time. He's a kid who has absolutely no "world view" because he thought being a small-time rounder was going to make him big. If he really ever loved this girl, he would stop being a whiny little pussy and accept his responsibility in this situation.
There should be no "blame" in this situation - because it was something both parties should have understood could happen. The girl is dealing with reality. OP is not.
OP's lack of actual feedback to these responses is pretty sad. Here's hoping it was real and not just some attempt to start a firestorm.
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I don't understand why you're passing judgment on the OP. Nothing in life is guaranteed. It's not just a cliche. If BC is taken properly and I mean to the letter properly, then it is quite effective. Someone getting pregnant while on BC and properly taking it is statistically unlikely and thus unlucky. The fact is that the OP talked to his GF about what would happen in the case that it failed. This is more responsible than most people ever are.
So why everyone is saying "man up" and accept the responsibiltiy. Obviously OP was misled to some degree (how much so, only he knows) and is not prepared to change the life he currently lives. This doesn't make him morally good or bad, its just a choice.
I think it's a lot more noble of the OP to outright admit he isn't prepared for this and doesn't want it than him trying to half-ass his way through fatherhood. If you're having a child the least you could do for it is to want it. When you don't even want it, what sort of life is it going to have?
OP isn't a coward at all. His GF is making a selfish choice based on only her feelings and as a result of this he's considering his own options. Think of it like a game of chess. Even when you can anticipate or attempt to guide your opponent's next (or other future) move through your own moves, you can never guarantee it. Thus, all your own moves are in part reactionary because you can only have 100% accurate information upon the sucessful completion of your opponent's move.
It's an unfortunate situation to be in, but it's unrealistic to say OP has to do this or that simply because some options may not be socially accepted. The fact of the matter is, in deciding to have the baby against OP's wishes, his GF is subject to the consequences. If these consequences happen to be him leaving her, then so be it. As long as OP requires his minimum legal requirements to the child he should be able to go about his life as he chooses.
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