[youtalkfunny]

--The first time I saw an ECW card. I could not believe what I was watching. The stuff they were doing was unheard of at the time. I had never seen a ladder, a stack of tables, or barbed wire used in a match until then.

--The first Piper's Pit, with Frank Williams (I'd post a YouTube link, but the wrestling videos are all crawling on YouTube for some reason right this second). Again, an innovation.

--The most famous "Piper's Pit", as mentioned above, with Snuka: "I wanted you to feel at home, I brought you a pineapple, I brought you banana...I should've brought you a tree, so you could swing like a monkey..."

--Lou Albano, explaining why his arm was in a cast: "I was out in the parking lot, outside the stadium, when Andre the Giant grabbed me; Gorilla Monsoon held my arm out; and Chief Jay Strongbow hit me on the arm with a board, and broke my arm." MacMahon angrily dismissed the story as obvious hogwash, and spent the next several months asking Albano, "Why is your arm still in a cast? How long does it take a broken arm to mend? It's been six months now!"

When one of his guys got wrapped up in Strongbow's sleeper hold, and was on his way to certain defeat, Albano jumped into the ring, slipped the cast off his arm, and beat Strongbow bloody with it.

I was a little kid. I cried.

I didn't cry, however, the time Albano had Strongbow tied up in the ropes (do they still do that any more?), and stuffed the feathers from the Indian headdress into Strongbow's mouth. I thought that was funny.

--When Larry Zybisko turned heel, turning on his mentor, Bruno Sammartino, then later on his longtime tag partner, Tony Garrea. Guys didn't turn from face to heel much back then (nor heel to face, either), so that was unique. And Larry was the best I've ever seen on the mike. Better than Hogan, better than Piper. For a while there, we'd tune in each week, and spend the entire time looking forward to see what Larry Zybisko, "The New Living Legend", had to say.

Our favorite exchange, hyping an upcoming grudge match vs Garrea:

VINCE MacMAHON: Saturday night, Boston Garden, the main event, Larry Zybisko takes on his former tagteam partner, Tony Garrea. Tony Garrea joins us now, and Tony, you must be disappointed with Mr Zybisko at this point.

TONY GARREA: (soft-spoken Kiwi accent) Terribly disappointed, Vince, I just don't understand it, all the resentment Larry has, first for Bruno, then myself. Larry has been handed so much by so many, he's had all these opportunities handed to him. Myself, I never got the chance to finish high school, I never had a new car. Larry's had all these things and more, I just don't understand why he's so upset, or what's going through his mind.

VINCE MacMAHON: Tony Garrea, thank you very much. Approaching the interview area now, his opponent this Saturday night, Larry Zybisko...

LARRY ZYBISKO: (extremely smug and cocky, chewing gum) Oh, yeah, Tony Garrea, he comes out here crying to us...it's not MY FAULT he's too *stupid* to finish high school! It's not MY FAULT he's too *stupid* realize that he has plenty of money to buy a new car if he wants to!

(I was laughing too hard to hear the rest of the interview)

--Hyping an upcoming match at the Boston Garden, champion Bob Backlund spoke about his challenger, some cowboy from Texas (probably Black Jack Mulligan): "He's said some terrible things about the fans here in Boston. This is such a great city, so much tradition and history here--what does a guy from Texas know about history?"

Then it was Mulligan's turn, accompanied by his manager, Classy Fred Blassie, who spent the entire interview screaming over and over, in that trademark gravelly voice of his, "REMEMBER THE ALAMO! REMEMBER THE ALAMO!"