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- that there are many people of mixed ancestry. Is someone who is 50% white and 50% black entitled to receive reparations, or should they pay reparations, or is it a wash? How about someone who is 25% black and 75% white? Do they count as "black" for college admissions, yet receive reparations instead of paying reparations? Or maybe should they pay only half as much reparations as someone else who is all-white?

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Your level of guilt and your reparations payment will be determined impartially by a photometer, which will detect the darkness of the skin of your forhead. Lighter shades will pay the most, darker shades recieve the most. If you are the exact shade of Halle Berry, the photometer will judge you both guilt-free and a non-victim.