[madnak]

My father did a similar thing. He got his JD as my mother supported him, and then decided he didn't want to practice law and went for his PhD. She divorced him over it.

A lot of it depends on shared expectations. Anything more than $30,000 annually isn't really a "small" income. My mother was working many hours (and trying to be a mother simultaneously) to support my father. He got his act together, but not until he was about 35 (years after the divorce).

Is this the same as the situation in the OP? No. In fact, if Dad had gotten a legal clerkship Mom would have been pleased. And they had two kids.

There is a huge difference between one partner living off the other (who has to work very hard for her money) and one partner contributing $40,000 while the other contributes $150,000. In the first case the relationship is very unequal and realistic expectations haven't been met. In the second, there's plenty enough money and the wife is doing her part. The man may have expected to become a millionaire or something, and he might have been frustrated to find out he wouldn't. But I don't think that's valid. I don't think having more expensive dinnerware should ever be worth more than the partner's happiness.