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Old 02-16-2007, 02:03 AM
-sk00lb0y- -sk00lb0y- is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 447
Default Re: I wrote a story (kinda) what does OOT think?

[ QUOTE ]
Solid.

However, I feel like the first sentence is somehow wrong. When I read the first paragraph I expected this to be some kind of emergency situation that caused a rush similar to what you used to feel when you were wrestling, but then it was actually about wrestling.

Just my two cents, I'm far from a writer though.

ken

[/ QUOTE ]


Thats kind of what i am trying to convey, it was like i was out there with him.... does that make sense? like i was wrestling, even though i was helpless... does that come off at all?
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