[Senator_Thack]

My thoughts:

1. It's none of your business. You don't know if the vague rumour is true, and it doesn't affect your relationship with either of them.

2. Someone's past sexual history is not that important in the grand scheme of things. As Dom wrote, there are times a good friend needs to intervene, and this is not one of them.

3. If it is so important to Joe to know her sexual history, then it is up to him to ask about it. There's a good chance he has heard similar things and either doesn't care or doesn't want to know. The only way it makes sense to talk to him would be if you were sure the rumours were true, if you were sure they were important to Joe, you were sure he had asked her about them, AND you were sure she lied about it. That's a big assumption.

4. The negative consequences outweigh the positive. Assuming all of the above were true, there is a remote chance that Joe would be grateful to you for telling him. More likely, he would either be openly pissed at you or he would find a way to, deep inside, partially blame you for the situation. The messenger always gets shot. No matter what happens, Maria will never be a close friend.

5. If they do stay together, your friendship with Joe will likely tail off. The bit below is the truth:
[ QUOTE ]
I'm thinking that your ideas regarding the power of a wife are a little deluded. You can garuntee that if you tell Joe about this, Maria will find out where the info came from. And if she does, lets assume that she and Joe stay together, I would put money down that you will start seeing less of Joe.

You might not stop being friends, but Maria could not possibly be anything but uncomfortable around you and that means she will not want to spend time around you. And if we assume that Joe is a caring and considerate husband, this means that he will not want to put her into situations where she will be uncomfortable.

Honestly, I'm guessing at this point that this explaination is going to fall on deaf ears, but its true none the less.

Keep your mouth shut. NO possible good can EVER come from getting between a couple unless it involves cheating, addiction, or abuse. (and for the record, ommissions regarding past sex lives with no current implications does not represent a betrayal)

[/ QUOTE ]
Again, this is the truth. You will see less and less of Joe until you wonder if he dropped off the face of the earth. Possibly because he doesn't like you meddling in something that's not your business, but more likely because his wife won't like you. Over time, as he has less free time due to increasing work demands, kids and his relationship, you will be the one cut out, particularly if his wife doesn't absolutely love you. It's hard enough to find time to see your married buddies without their wife putting the veto on. The only way to ensure that you still see him is to be that one of his friends that she really likes. Passing on unsubstantiated rumours about her sexual history is not a good way to get her to like you.


Cliff's Notes: Taking it upon yourself to meddle in others' relationships by passing on unsubstantiated rumours about something that is none of your business is likely to damage your relationships with all involved.