[the_scalp]

Clayton,

Since I've played poker with you with 1200 BB effective stacks (2+2 game), I know you have the fear of God in you.

Honestly, I've studied theology for the last 8 years. I'm a Christian (who often struggles with doubt). I meet and talk to young people who describe a spiritual understanding in the manner you do often.

I don't think there's a proper title for your belief-system. This probably results from the fact that your belief system seems to derive from a rebellion against organized religion. You don't seem to take with organized religion -- that's understandable, organized religion has screwed a lot up and certainly doesn't appeal to people who have been educated in a society that teaches people to prize cynicism and doubt (and avoid critical thinking). (Also not surprising in a society where people are convinced that respecting other people's beliefs means you can't consider other's beliefs to be wrong or mostly wrong.) Don't be suprised, though, that in avoiding organized religion, you're left in the dark as far as being able to 'title' your belief-system goes.

I'll make up a few for your consideration. How about "Spiritual-anarachism" or "modernist-spiritual-mutt" or "anti-ism-ist"? Good luck with your search, bud.