El Diablo,
I hate service people like you've described, and I find myself never going back to a store where I'm treated like this. Ditto for restaurants and waitstaff. Ditto for hotels and inappropriately aggressive bellstaff. I just smile, and I'm gone forever.
Clothing-wise, two places have never, ever disappointed me.
Nordstrom people are consistently courteous and never lecture.
The best of the best for clothing is
Boyd's of Philadelphia. The people are top notch (like the store itself), most of them having been there 10 years or more. I've been going there for 13 years.
It's a place you can go to every 3 or 4 years, spend a few grand, and be fully outfitted for another 3 or 4 -- and when you go back, the salespeople will remember you 4 years later.
If you swing by Boyd's the next time you're in the neighborhood, you'll be very glad you did.