[kemystery]

Farmer says to his doctor; 'Hey Doc, I need some birth control for my daughter.'

Doctor asks 'Why, is she sexually active?'

Farmer; 'No, she just kinda lays there.'

(bonus: make the farmer hail from some funny state, like Alaska)


Three buddies are out walking the golf course one day, and after hitting the 12th tee 'Bob' complains that he has to take a dump but it is too far from the clubhouse.

'Frank' urges 'Bob' to just venture down into the woods off to the side of the teebox and do his business there. 'Bob, hikes into the forest aways, while 'Frank' and the third guy 'Neal' wait on the 12th tee.

After 15-20 minutes several groups have 'played through' with 'Bob' not returning from the forest 'Frank' sends 'Neal' to go find 'Bob'.

Several minutes pass by and 2 more groups play through, 'Frank' decides to go find the two other guys himself. Well soon enough, 'Frank' stumbles into a clearing in the woods and finds 'Neal' has got 'Bob' bent over a tree stump [censored] him doggy style!

"What the hell is going on!!!" yells 'Frank' "What the [censored] are you guys doing?"

'Neal' starts explaining "Well, I came down here and Bob was on the ground - unconscious...."

"You moron..." interrupts 'Frank' "That's what mouth - to - mouth rescesitation is for!"

'Neal: "Well... that's how it started"