[magithighs]

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... So in my mind I think whatever I need to play the lag style to hit the lucky run as it's my only chance to make money back.

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Therin lies your problem. This is the gambler's fallacy. As soon as anyone says "I need to make my money back" they may as well take several hundred/thousand/million dollars (whatever is lost) and just send it to me and quit. I promise I will return half and you'll have 100 times more than if you continued to play whatever game you are playing.

Your money is GONE. It's not your money any more. You have to earn whatever you're going to get. And sadly it won't be in one hand or one session. It will take alot of playing well, alot of luck and more solid playing.

Good luck.
Magi

P.S. Take some time off -- you should stay away from the game as long as it takes to get rid of that feeling that you need to make money back.