[BOTW]

El D, I went to his place the first night I found out they were going on a date. I only wanted to confront them with my knowledge, like somehow me letting them know I knew would justify me and the way I felt. At the time I believed I just wanted to talk to him, but I realize now I likely would have been violent.

I knew him casually prior to them going out. Whether it was paranoia or perception, I suspected he liked her. When I discovered they were together, I felt as though he had betrayed me and it vindicated my prior thoughts. I saw things in very black and white terms and at a very primitive level. I thought, "I was right about him and should have done something before to stop him." My thoughts devolved into me wanting to hurt him. I felt that if I busted his knee he would no longer be a "real man" and she'd have to come back.

After not being able to contact her for a few days or so, I got angry and decided to take action. His neighbor saw me and I was unable to convince the neighbor I was a friend. I guess friends don't sneak around in the bushes with a bat.

Later, I heard that they were getting serious. "How could this be? I could be the man of her dreams if only she'd give me another chance. She just doesn't see it because he's in the way. I need to get him out of the way."

The main catalyst was anger.