[gamblore99]

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believe working on inner feelings and crap like that will have about zero success in helping future relationships. At the core of a person's desire for a relationship is their instinctual needs - which is primarily finding a mate with strong genes. The emotional state of the partner has little to do with it except in how that emotional state signals strong or weak genes

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I think you have a fairly good understanding of evolutionary psychology. We are attracted to others who we think have good genes. There is a reason why woman [censored] the bad boy, but marry the safe guy. The bad boy conveys strong genes through his looks and attitude, whereas the safe guy conveys good genes through resources and security. By working on his emotional problems and learning to communicate and trust more, he can be a better parent and husband offering more security to a woman and her children. This makes him a more attractive mate.