[SammyKid11]

Kurosh...

I'm going to attempt a serious reply here. You have gotten a lot of one-liners and mean implications given to you on this thread (and, admittedly...what did you expect when you ask The Internet about your relationship). But here's the thing.

This isn't about whether or not your gf has cheated on you (though from listening to your words only, I'd be willing to make an even-money bet that somewhere along the line she's done something that you considered real betrayal). It's not about whether or not it's cool for your gf to show off her body to other guys. It's not about whether her ex-bf is going to be there or not. It's about her having an appropriate amount of respect for you.

I'm not a chauvinist guy...I believe women should have equal rights as men, and I believe relationships should have balance. But women have a natural power advantage, especially with younger guys who are so happy to be getting laid by a hottie (with DD breasts, I might add) that they'll go along with quite a lot to ensure that well doesn't dry up. However, in order for ANY relationship to actually succeed long-term, there has to be a balance of real, mutual respect.

If my gf came to me and asked if I'd be okay with her skinny-dipping in front of guys (possibly including her ex, blah blah)...just the act of her asking me would be a sign that she does not have much respect for me. Because she KNOWS that I'm not a nudist or a hippy or a swinger. If that makes me "jealous" because I have a "typical" American attitude toward what's appropriate for someone I'm in a relationship with, then so be it. But she knows that about me, and so she knows without asking that it's not cool (not the least of which because she wouldn't be comfortable with it if the situation were reversed).

From the sounds of it, your gf knows that you're not any of the above people (nudist, hippy, swinger)...and therefore, the fact that she asked anyway, and the fact that she got upset at your resistance, is indicative of a relationship in trouble. She's stabbing at more power and that's simply not something you can give her if you want a long-term thing. It may sound counter-intuitive, but the only way I've found a relationship to have a long-term chance in this day and age is for a guy to stand up at or near the beginning and lay down a few simple laws for what he wants and what he will and won't put up with:
a) As other posters have said, she will respect you for standing up for yourself.
b) You're not put in positions like this where you have to apologize for having very normal feelings of not wanting other guys ogling her naked, not wanting a potentially dangerous sexual situation to come up, etc.
c) Laying down a few rules would keep her from acting so callously in the first place. Her friends don't like you and don't invite you? WHY DOES SHE HANG OUT WITH THEM? If YOU are the man in her life, she ought to have already told those people to accept you or be prepared to not see much of her.

So...not based on anything but a desire to see your own relationship have a chance, you need to stand up, tell your girl what you're okay with and what you're not (do it nicely, but do it firmly). If she's really all that into you, this will cause her heart to flutter because it will unlock her animal instinct to be with A MAN. If she's not really that into you, she will use it as a reason to break up with you...and if she does that, it's something that would have happened soon anyway (and this way, it'll be because of your terms, not because you got dumped after being cheated on).

Anyway, best of luck to you in whatever you decide.


P.S. - Aside from any issues of jealousy, 2 or 3 guys and a girl with a rockin' body showing off her DD breasts is a dangerous situation...not because she might cheat, but because the male sex drive is a powerful and sometimes sick and twisted thing. Throw in alcohol, young guys, nudity, and a hottie in a swimming pool.....and this IS how rape sometimes happens. You do NOT know these guys well enough to know whether one or more of them are capable of that, and neither does she (though she might claim to). No one knows a sex criminal is a sex criminal until he gets caught. And sometimes, guys don't even know that about themselves until they're so tempted and drunk that it just happens. Anyway, something else to think about.