Worst strip club experience.
 

So tonight I made the first trip I've made to a strip club in a long time. I usually just go to them for bachelor parties which I haven't had to be to one in about a year. Tonight I got done playing 18 holes of free golf with free beer and it was decided that it's a good thing to go to a strip club tonight.

It's just 2 of us which is a first for me at a strip club, but eventually the women took over us. I buy a private dance and then head back to my friend, we hand around a little longer and then I buy another. I go down to get said dance but am then handed a ton of bills that glow in the [censored] ing dark for my change ( which should have been a decent amount) which is a clear sign of BS.

I hate this a ton, and I knew they were fake bills but I let it ride with the thrill of paying for drinks at their machine with said fake bills.

Second BS thing that's happened to me is that I've had a girl take me for a private dance, and then aske me if she wants me to keep going in the middle of a dance? Who the [censored] is going to say no? The problem with this is that she never told me that I was entering the second dance, and she never told me that after I hander her a 100$ she was going to take a 30$ tip for herself before handing me my change. WTF is this BS.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

And your point is???? No different than most strip clubs around this great country of ours.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

Consider this part of the growing up process. You are more the wiser for it.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
And your point is???? No different than most strip clubs around this great country of ours.

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I'd like to hear stories of people getting boned worse then I did.

edit to add: fake bills being given to is [censored] bs I even said something to her, but theres no way that that this would be resolved in my favor by talking it over with the club.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

What a whore, that sucks klompy

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

http://sihwb.blogspot.com/2007/07/de...er-dancer.html


Gotta replace some letters in this one
http://sihwb.blogspot.com/2007/07/he...u-c**t111.html

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

A few years ago, a buddy was ejected from a club for ejaculating during a lap dance. To be fair, this was a hands on club and she was a serious grinder.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/8047/a330bmki9.gif

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
A few years ago, a buddy was ejected from a club for ejaculating during a lap dance. To be fair, this was a hands on club and she was a serious grinder.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/8047/a330bmki9.gif

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Isn't this a HUGE brag?


edit to add I still have 1 fake bill, and if I can find a black light I can prove fake bill.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
A few years ago, a buddy was ejected from a club for ejaculating during a lap dance. To be fair, this was a hands on club and she was a serious grinder.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/8047/a330bmki9.gif

[/ QUOTE ]


Isn't this a HUGE brag?

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Isn't this a huge spam??

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

maybe some consider it a brag, heh, but he was massively embarrassed and made me promise not to tell anyone. That lasted a couple days.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

what was her name?

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

If I were you I would call the secret service

<font color="white"> I wouldn't really </font>

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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If I were you I would call the secret service

<font color="white"> I wouldn't really </font>

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Nice white quotes.


TBH I don't think it would be that bad to get the gov. involved. I still have 1 bill of proof involved. There's no way this is the first time that she's spread these bills like this.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

goddammit what was her name?!?!?

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
goddammit what was her name?!?!?

[/ QUOTE ]

Savana
Austin
Saucey
.....

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

at the rhino this summer i banged a stripper bareback. I thought i was gonna die for like 3 weeks before i got tested.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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I go down to get said dance but am then handed a ton of bills that glow in the [censored] ing dark for my change ( which should have been a decent amount) which is a clear sign of BS.

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You sure they weren't bills that had gone through the wash? Black light + laundered bills = glowing money

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I go down to get said dance but am then handed a ton of bills that glow in the [censored] ing dark for my change ( which should have been a decent amount) which is a clear sign of BS.

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You sure they weren't bills that had gone through the wash? Black light + laundered bills = glowing money

[/ QUOTE ]


If this actually works it blows my entire theory out the door, but this is very possible if this works.


edit: as soon as I check which bill glows right now I'll run half the deck of 20 in the wash and see what happens.


edit again: how should I run the control group? I have 20 bills of ones that I have 1 that is the current fake? shoulde I just run 2 fakes and 2 controls in the wash? And by fake I mean with detergent.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

you dont even remember her name...you pig!

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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at the rhino this summer i banged a stripper bareback.

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No you didn't.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

I have a story that I am writing up that details the famous night of when I went to seamless.....Paid 3200 to get laid after a girl promised to go home with me if I paid for her remaianing hours, didn't get laid, got kicked out by multiple bouncers, called the cops for fradulent charges by the stripper, called my dad seeking for advice, got kicked out of the Orleans for sleeping on the couch of their reception area, and not fufullying my fantasy of getting laid by a stripper.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

Certain types of detergent glow under black lights. If you've put clothes through the wash and then dump the detergent on the clothes rather than loading up the detergent dispenser and then go cosmic bowling or to a strip club you will look like a slob that has spilled all over yourself (or spunked your pants). Back in the high school days people used to paint stuff on their walls with detergent as it will glow with the blacklight.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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at the rhino this summer i banged a stripper bareback. I thought i was gonna die for like 3 weeks before i got tested.

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a) no you didn't
b) that's not enough time to really know

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
I have a story that I am writing up that details the famous night of when I went to seamless.....Paid 3200 to get laid after a girl promised to go home with me if I paid for her remaianing hours, didn't get laid, got kicked out by multiple bouncers, called the cops for fradulent charges by the stripper, called my dad seeking for advice, got kicked out of the Orleans for sleeping on the couch of their reception area, and not fufullying my fantasy of getting laid by a stripper.

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your fantasy was to bang a stripper while paying for it?

way to shoot for the stars!

one time i went to the pool and my dream was to get wet.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I have a story that I am writing up that details the famous night of when I went to seamless.....Paid 3200 to get laid after a girl promised to go home with me if I paid for her remaianing hours, didn't get laid, got kicked out by multiple bouncers, called the cops for fradulent charges by the stripper, called my dad seeking for advice, got kicked out of the Orleans for sleeping on the couch of their reception area, and not fufullying my fantasy of getting laid by a stripper.

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your fantasy was to bang a stripper while paying for it?

way to shoot for the stars!

one time i went to the pool and my dream was to get wet.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes it really is, I have been trying to pay to get [censored] by
a stripper for years now and after like 20 attempts this seemed like my best chance.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

isn't 3 weeks long enough for everything but the aids?

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

http://www.wonderquest.com/LightBlack.htm

http://www.makezine.com/blog/archive...n_with_uv.html

Re: Worst strip club experience. *DELETED*
 

Post deleted by Klompy

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

Maybe the strip club is laundering money? [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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maybe some consider it a brag, heh, but he was massively embarrassed and made me promise not to tell anyone. That lasted a couple days.

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That's funny, a friend of ours busted at Mons Venus (the best strip club in the everything) and he was a hero...




Regarding your bad experience, you need some advice.



If a stripper is pretty lame and just totally trying to take advantage of you, which is what happened, you need to:

-say 'talk to me after the song..." when she asks "want to keep going, sugar?" after half a song. This is a common ploy to take advantage of drunk guys and get two song's pay for one song

- never let them control any conversation. They are strippers and often submit to mental dominance. You be the man and she will be the whore. If you aren't the man, she's the bitch.

- barter. If she is doing one song for 20, after one song and she asks if you want to continue, say "how about three songs for 40?" she'll say "no way", you say "c'mon,...... 3 for 50". If she says 'no' here just stand up like you're done and say one more time "3 for 50?..."

You are getting 3 for 50. If not, hand her 25 and walk.

- when she says "I'm taking a $30 tip...", you say "No, how it works is...I give the tips, you get the tips. Give me my change and we'll go from there."


The key though is, you have to always be firm and take the lead.
These girls respond to a firm Daddy, never a softy. Softies are their bread and butter.
Not mean-dick firm that gets you tossed out by a goon. Calm, confident, unbending firm. Just like she wants it.



Disclaimer: I rarely go to strip clubs any more, but this is culled from first-hand advice from others and experience from myself.

Mons Venus is the only place I go now and I live about 1200 miles away. It ruined me.



In case anyone is wondering, Mons Venus = Full touch - vag with 7s, 8s &amp; 9s. Beer in the parking lot. AMIRITE?

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

[ QUOTE ]
I have a story that I am writing up that details the famous night of when I went to seamless.....Paid 3200 to get laid after a girl promised to go home with me if I paid for her remaianing hours, didn't get laid, got kicked out by multiple bouncers, called the cops for fradulent charges by the stripper, called my dad seeking for advice, got kicked out of the Orleans for sleeping on the couch of their reception area, and not fufullying my fantasy of getting laid by a stripper.

[/ QUOTE ]

This story sounds amazing. More details plz

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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Yes it really is, I have been trying to pay to get [censored] by a stripper for years now and after like 20 attempts this seemed like my best chance.

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Really? How else have you failed in these 20 attempts? Because it seems astounding that you have not managed to do this.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

dude, you suck at strip clubs.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

My worst strip club experience. I was at a nasty strip club in South Dakota as sort of a new job initiation. Every girl there was disgusting beyond belief. This nasty stripper would not leave me alone. Little did I know one of my new coworkers bought me a dance from this skank. I kept telling her politely no and my wife would not like that I got a dance (total BS, she goes with me to them) and after she keps bugging me, never telling me the dance was paid for, I finally tell her very rudely to go away and don't come back.

She starts crying and yelling something to my coworker. After she calms down she goes and dances for someone else in my group and at this point I'm told the dance was bought for me. Feeling like I needed to make this right for all I get a dance out of my own pocket, $25 at this dump.

I get the dance and she stinks worse then you could ever imagine. She had not cleaned it out lately. I could barely stand the dance as she keeps her pussy pressed against my face the whole time. Thankfully they have to wear thongs.

All I could dream for was last call as I was with a group. Finally it came. Moral of the story, don't go to strip clubs in South Dakota.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

My worst experience was about a month ago at Crazy Horse Too in Philly. When I got to the club I decided to pound a 40 oz. in the parking lot and while doing this with my homies some wierd guy came up to us asking for a lighter, then he was like wow dude your huge, I bet noone messes with you blah blah, and he said there was a shady pole in the club where the girls got totally naked. This guy was really weird, he was whacked out on some kind of drugs.

Anyway after chillin in the club for like an hour I see the guy and he walks over to me and is like "sorry but they aren't getting completely naked in the shady spot, let me buy you a lapdance for misleading you." I can't refuse that so I said ship it, and so he paid the stripper and she starts grinding up on me and stuff, titties in my face and after about 30 seconds, she stops and is like wtf! someone stole my clothes. I was pretty unhappy because that was the shittiest lap dance ever. So after putting 2 and 2 together I figured out that this guy is some wierd stripper clothes stealer and had set me up. About a half hour later I saw the guy gripped outside the club by the bouncers. I complained about my shiity lapdance and the managers did nothing to compensate me, all they said is we'll get back to you and never did.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

dont go to a strip club blowed out of your mind

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

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when she says "I'm taking a $30 tip...", you say "No, how it works is...I give the tips, you get the tips. Give me my change and we'll go from there.

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tbh the original story isn't 100% correct. I handed her the hundo, grabbed my change and then stuck it in my pocket and walked back to the party I was with. It wasn't until I got back and put the money back in my wallet until I figured out how bad I got screwed. I'd like to think if I would have noticed what she was doing I would have not let it happen, but tbh I prob would have been so confused that by the time I figured it out she would have been out of sight already.

Oddjob,

Yes I do suck at strip clubs. I haven't been to that many in my life and I'm a noob.



empiremaker,

Please give the full version of your story.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

Strippers don't realize that you can shear a sheep many times, but only skin him once. I've been to a strip club one time, and will never go back. I didn't get ripped off for too much (I paid out 160ish total for the night, and it should have been about 30 less or so), but I have a zero tolerance policy on unethical stuff like that. Congratulations you dirty stupid women: you lost a potential lifelong customer for a measly 30 dollars.

IMO, the strippers of the world would benefit immensely from unionization. Partly because the clubs give them a raw deal, but also because they could standardize their practices, and improve their overall reputation.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

I was in a club for the first time in at least 3 years last weekend for a buddy's bachelor party. It was at Sin here in Vegas...I have to admit I had a blast. Had written them off in the past, and am in no mood to rush back...but I spent $220 and the dancer I picked out hung out and got wasted with me and stuck her [censored] in my face for about 4 hours. Well worth it in my opinion. Find the right girl &amp; it's not awful is the point.

Find the wrong girl - which is easy - those places end up sucking hard.

Re: Worst strip club experience.
 

em2's story is pretty great haha