When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Think back in your life upon major and semi-major decisions you've made, choices that heavily impacted your life for at least 3-4 months or more. Cities you've chosen to live in, colleges you chose to attend, jobs you've taken, etc. Something like "I bought a crappy car and regret it" isn't what I'd qualify as a major life choice, unless for example, you paid way too much for the car and the consequences of your purchase impacted your life in other ways.

Now think back to decisions of yours that resulted in bad outcomes. Did you anticipate or at least appreciate the risk of a bad outcome at the start, and to what extent? (Let's except romantic relationships for this point, obviously those ALWAYS have the possibility of ending badly.)

When did you realize or begin to realize that your decision was causing adverse consequences in your life, and you should do something else instead? (Leave cities, change jobs, etc.)

At what point did you decide to "cut bait" and acknowledge that despite any sunken costs, what you were doing was not the right thing for you? What did you do to fix the problem, if anything? Did your fix work?

I realize the questions I'm asking require much more introspection than the average OOT thread but I would love to hear your responses. There is a personal context here but I'll wait because I don't want to make this thread all about me.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I spent six billion dollars on culinary school and realized there was no way I was going to finish about three months in. I also lived in Poughkeepsie for that year, huge beat right there. All in all I spent the down payment for a condo on nothing. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I picked a college on a whim and have never since left Binghamton, NY. Worst decision of my life.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Ive been fortunate enough never to have made any really bad life choices, but Ive been unfortunate enough to never had the chance to epically [censored] something up.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

1) Stayed at crappy job for too long, ended up hating job and no caring about the qualitry of work I was doing

2) Dicked around first year of school, got marginal hands and have to take a few cources over, pissed of parents who were paying

3) Last two relationships ended because I wasnt willing to put any real time or effort into them, no gf in 2 yrs

Those are the ones that come to mind now, there are probably many, many more. Although I did learn valuable lessons from all of them.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I have about a million dollars that 90% of these posts are going to be about passively rather than actively messing your life up.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I have about a million dollars that 90% of these posts are going to be about passively rather than actively messing your life up.

[/ QUOTE ]
True... but if "stayed at a crappy job for too long" was the bad, passive [censored] up, then what made you take the bad job in the first place? Was there any thought at all?

Or--if you are in a [censored] job, when did you become cognizant of that, and is it messing up your life bad enough that you should or are doing something about it?

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I started realizing that dropping out of college after 2 1/2 years was a mistake about a year and a half later when friends started graduating and I felt like a bum. I'm actively trying to change this right now though.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I started realizing that dropping out of college after 2 1/2 years was a mistake about a year and a half later when friends started graduating and I felt like a bum. I'm actively trying to change this right now though.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah I'll add this to my list of mistakes as well.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I have about a million dollars that 90% of these posts are going to be about passively rather than actively messing your life up.

[/ QUOTE ]
True... but if "stayed at a crappy job for too long" was the bad, passive [censored] up, then what made you take the bad job in the first place? Was there any thought at all?

Or--if you are in a [censored] job, when did you become cognizant of that, and is it messing up your life bad enough that you should or are doing something about it?

[/ QUOTE ]


I think in general people are just attracted to change if they arent happy in their current situation, some are just out of college, and dont know what they want, some just want to put some cash in their pocket. Once some stability sets in, and once they get in the groove, its really not "that bad", until 10 years go by and they realize...WTF HAVE I BEEN DOING, I COULD BE DOING SOMETHING WAY BETTER.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I quit teaching at an admittedly lower-performing school (where I was actually pretty happy) and moved to teach at a higher-performing school, thinking that it would be better.

I was very, very wrong.

The good news is I found a job at another school and they seem to actually value me as an employee, which is a feeling I never got at the higher-performing school. I'm excited to start over.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I quit teaching at an admittedly lower-performing school (where I was actually pretty happy) and moved to teach at a higher-performing school, thinking that it would be better.

I was very, very wrong.

The good news is I found a job at another school and they seem to actually value me as an employee, which is a feeling I never got at the higher-performing school. I'm excited to start over.

[/ QUOTE ]
whatever happened with that bitch coworker who's husband was busted for something or other?

Also, I need a little refresher on the details obviously.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Funny you mention/remember that... his trial started earlier this week, and supposedly he was offered a plea bargain for 12y+8mo... no word on if he's taken it or what's happening with that. There's more information about the whole thing at this page if you want more detail.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

i am currently making the biggest transition so far in my life i am starting to have some serious second thoughts.

i am moving from idaho to la in one week. i still have to take a final in order to get my degree in the next few days.

i know absolutely nobody within a day's drive of la. actually the closest friends/family i have would be in Salt Lake City, Utah. (any 2+2ers need a commerce buddy?)

I have rented a place i have never seen, not even pictures on-line or a description of the floor plan.

i got a sales job in the orange county area, i have a real job title but i am pretty sure i am going to be a glorified telemarketer. the job will be 100% commission based, and they have said they will let me go if i am unable to perform. even more scary is that they seemed very very very eager to hire me despite me not being experienced and quite frankly not coming across that well on paper. that compounded with the fact that they are telling my that i *can* make an outrageous amount of money makes me think that this job might be a very bad job.

rent in CA vs ID is double and i am running low on savings since i have spent most of it trying to make this move and i haven't played a significant amount of online poker since the legislation.

oh i recently broke up on fairly unfavorable terms with my girlfriend of ~6 years. so basically my life 3 weeks ago will bear absolutely no resemblance to my life in a week's time.

CLIFF NOTES: Basically i've made the leap of my life with my back up plan being grinding it out at the commerce for rent money and about half a dozen things have to go right for me not to be on my ass in 9 months. Also, i lost a pretty awesome girlfriend and that combined with all the [censored] you have to go through to move is pretty stressful.

/end whiny emofest


EDIT: also i have never lived in a town with more than 16,000 people and i have spent most of my life living an area were 10k+ means big town. so i am a bit anxious about dealing with city-types.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Sophomore year of college I decided to live with one group of friends rather than another. I likely would have a very different life right now if that decision was made the other way (probably for the better)

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I picked a college on a whim and have never since left Binghamton, NY. Worst decision of my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

I went to my school on a complete whim as well. i got accepted to USC, then saw the price tag, thought briefly about joining the ROTC then decided to go to a state school that cost 1800$ a year. i am not leaving off a zero either.

this is the first time i have ever admitted it, but there was a hot chick who was a year younger than me (that i had literally spent about 10 hours of my life with) who was from this college town and thats the reason i went to that college in retrospect.

worst reason to pick a college ever.

nothing ever came the semi-relationship i developed with this girl because i was already in a semi relationship with the girlfriend mentioned in my earlier post in this thread.



How long have you been in that town? why would say it was your worst decision?

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

upon impact.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I took a full scholarship at the first place that offered me one instead of exploring my options more, mostly because I hated filling out applications and writing essays. Now I'd much rather be somewhere with a more traditional college atmosphere (big DI athletics, esp football and basketball, lots of drunk sloots) than the crummy commuter school in the hood I currently go to. Who knows if this will affect me long term, but it has definitely affected my 4 college years.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I started realizing that dropping out of college after 2 1/2 years was a mistake about a year and a half later when friends started graduating and I felt like a bum. I'm actively trying to change this right now though.

[/ QUOTE ]

I am one of the rare people that dropped out of college and think it was the best decision of my life.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

About 2 months into quitting my high-end serving job where I made $50/hr+ at age 19 to manage a gaming store for less than $10/hr.

Boy, that sucked.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

my biggest regret, other than moving to south texas, away from everyone i know...
i bought these old school shell toe addias, secial edition, they were y faviorte shoes, i eventually sarted wearing them to the skatepark, doing bmx tricks and such. the bottom of the shoe got ate up pretty bad, but i was to sentimental over them so i kept riding with them.
i eventually sliped a pedal and broke my ankle in 6 places when the tread gave out bad one day (my pedal had small spikes in them to keep your feet on them).
wo sugurys, almost 4 months later of not walking, and 9 titanium screws heavier, the surgeon beat the 60% i had to lose my foot. As greatful as i am, i can barely stand to wear busted up shoes now

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

That sucks, but it's hardly a major life decision.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I picked a college on a whim and have never since left Binghamton, NY. Worst decision of my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm not reading any further, you win this thread.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I picked a college on a whim and have never since left Binghamton, NY. Worst decision of my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm not reading any further, you win this thread.

[/ QUOTE ]

I see you've been to Binghamton [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] lol

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
worst reason to pick a college ever.

[/ QUOTE ]

I picked Binghamton over the other schools I applied to because the admissions people paid for my lunch when I visited. GG.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

2nd day of the honeymoon I found her AZT. [censored] me.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
2nd day of the honeymoon I found her AZT. [censored] me.

[/ QUOTE ]

liar

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

i started freelancing probably before i was really ready to do so. i had one particular gig that just collapsed. where my client didn't know what she wanted her record to be like but i was pushing all the things she knew she didn't want.

recording self-destructed. the record was like 85% done and she chose not to finish it. my reputation in the local music scene has not been quite the same since.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

mbillie, I'm a Binghamton native and i feel your pain. Luckily, I did not go to school in Binghamton. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I've never made a correct life decision. I'm going with the George opposite rule now.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Not kissing ass when I failed 4 years of uni by 3 marks in one final exam.. They wouldn't pass me because I'd failed C++ exam by 2 marks 6 months before that. Same unqualified teacher for both exams... whats the chances :/

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I took a risk and left a mediocre job that was pretty cushy (just not going anywhere) for a job with a manager I knew was a poor one but the job offered a ton more potential.

Seriously, lesson for everyone here, no matter how much potential a job offers, if you know the manager sucks, forget it. They will ruin you every time.

I quit and am looking for other jobs right now. But the good side of it is the job made me get off my @$$ and start a business...something I wanted to do for years but never had the balls till now. I often wonder if I'd be starting this business had I stayed in my other job...

Simultaneous best and worst decision of my life? Depends how the business does I guess.

- C -

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
worst reason to pick a college ever.

[/ QUOTE ]

I picked Binghamton over the other schools I applied to because the admissions people paid for my lunch when I visited. GG.

[/ QUOTE ]

Honestly, if you're going SUNY there's worse places than Binghamtom

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

I'm currently in law school, so according to most, there's a good chance that I'll be bumping this thread in a few years.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
I just finished law school, so according to most, there's a good chance that I'll be bumping this thread in a few months.

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Two words: Kirksville, Missouri

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

When my ex-girlfriend, whom I reluctantly decided to give one more chance told me she was pregant and keeping the baby.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

[ QUOTE ]
When my ex-girlfriend, whom I reluctantly decided to give one more chance told me she was pregant and keeping the baby.

[/ QUOTE ]

[ QUOTE ]
Loc: getting Doom-Switched

[/ QUOTE ]

I laughed.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

Ask me in a few months-- I've quit my job and am moving to Vegas later this week.

Re: When did you realize your (semi) major life decision had gone bad?
 

This thread brightened up my day. Now my life doesn't feel so shetty anymore.