Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

My friends took their six yr old out for dinner for his bday, and told him he could pick the type of restaurant. He wanted tacos, so we took him to a Mexican place. We were a group of eight, 3 adults, 5 (well behaved) kids. The bday kid said that his favorite part of going out on his bday was having happy bday sung to him. He likes attn, but he is six.

When we arrived, the dad went up to the hostess and said when we ordered dessert, could they sing happy bday. She said of course, no problem. We had the meal, ordered dessert, and the waiter came over with it alone on the tray. The father asked if he could talk to the waiter (who was a very nice guy) and pulled him aside, asked if they could sing to the kid.

The waiter explained his boss told him they didn't do that there. She said they used to but they were trying to establish themselves as more of an "adult, upscale" restaurant. This is not an upscale place, its very casual, and there are always families there with kids. Its not a romantic dinner place.

The father asked to talk to the boss, who turned out to be the owner. This guy is one of the nicest guys I ever met, so I know he tried to handle this nicely. Basically, this is how he tells it. He told the owner that he requested before they sat to have it sung, and was told it was fine. She said, sorry if you are disappointed, but we don't do that anymore. I can't make an exception for one and not all.

He told her it wasn't him that would be disappointed, it was a six yr old, and that since they agreed to do it they should honor it. He said she got very rude with him and said, its a restauant, not a dinner threatre. If you want singing take him to a show. Needless to say, the bday boy was let down. He didn't even want his dessert. Am I overreacting her, or was this woman a complete douche?

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Complete douche.

Customers are (almost) always right, IF you want them to come back again. A 6 year old? Come on, give it to the little man.

T

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

The restaurants sucks for what they did obviously...

...but why not just have the group of you at dinner sing to the kid....they cant stop that??

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

This is where a cool dad clears a little space, stand up on the table and says:

"Hey Everybody, it's little Billy's birthday today!!!! He's 6 years old and we're all gonna sing him Happy Birthday together!!!!"

All while stomping a nice beat out on the table top.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Kind of douchey, but I'm glad that more restaurants are beginning to take this approach. Nothing kills the conversation in a restaurant faster than 15 waiters singing happy birthday to someone.

Take the little [censored] to Chuck E Cheese if you want somewhere that will shut down to sing him happy birthday.

Also

[ QUOTE ]

This is where a cool dad clears a little space, stand up on the table and says:

"Hey Everybody, it's little Billy's birthday today!!!! He's 6 years old and we're all gonna sing him Happy Birthday together!!!!"

All while stomping a nice beat out on the table top.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is obviously the solution.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Anything being done to keep children out of any place I'm in is ok by me.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
This is where a cool dad clears a little space, stand up on the table and says:

"Hey Everybody, it's little Billy's birthday today!!!! He's 6 years old and we're all gonna sing him Happy Birthday together!!!!"

All while stomping a nice beat out on the table top.

[/ QUOTE ]

QFT. Once they realized the waiter wasn't going to sing to the kid, why couldn't the family sing to the kid themselves?

Even if the dad managed to get his way after arguing with the manager, I'm pretty sure the singing from the staff wouldn't have been all that enthusiastic.

It's a real douche move on the restaurant's part, though. The manager obviously didn't get the word out to the staff that "Happy birthdays" are no longer to be sung. The manager handled this atrociously. They obviously lost themselves some customers.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Disgusting.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

I don't really understand why you need the restaurants permission to sing Happy Birthday, either.

That being said, I'd never go back to that restaurant.

BTW - If the restaurant had agreed to your request, they're actually opening themselves up to legal problems - They'd need a licensing agreement to legally perform the song due to copyrights. But they obviously didn't know that so it's not really an issue:

http://www.snopes.com/music/songs/birthday.asp

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
This is where a cool dad clears a little space, stand up on the table and says:

"Hey Everybody, it's little Billy's birthday today!!!! He's 6 years old and we're all gonna sing him Happy Birthday together!!!!"

All while stomping a nice beat out on the table top.

[/ QUOTE ]

haha, so hollywood, i love it.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

I would definitely not pay for the dessert if I was this guy.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

I hate it when the entire restaurant I'm at does that crap. It's so annoying. And then other people at your table start singing and looking at you like you're an [censored] because you don't want to sing to some little kid you don't know. UGH

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

I hope this is the worst thing that ever happens to this family.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

We did sing to him, and some people joined in but he was still disappointed. It was kind of the whole bringing the dessert over, with the candle on it, with a group of people coming over to our table that he was looking forward to.

Yes, I know its not the worst thing that can happen to a family. I am aware there are kids that don't even have food or medical care. There are kids being abused, etc. I just think to put a damper on a childs bday is really, really lousy. This woman had an extremely crappy attitude to begin with, when the dad tried to talk to her, she had this "whats the problem" nasty tone.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
Anything being done to keep children out of any place I'm in is ok by me.

[/ QUOTE ]

qft

http://www.usawx.com/thejou408.jpg

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Something similar happened with with us like a year ago. It was more about the waiter being a dick and then the owner backing him up. We had like 10-12 people at the table and I made sure to have my brother's friend use his black AMX card. The next day he called and disputed the charge. So getting a free $500 meal w/ drinks made up for them being dicks.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Signal,

I have mixed feelings about this. Would need to know the specific restaurant to make a decision on whether this was douche or appropriate.

There are tons of places where singing happy birthday is something they do and happens every time you go there. Seems like they should have picked a place like that.

I still don't understand why they didn't just sing happy birthday at the table.

Edit: Answered. OK. What's the place? Maybe we can make a better judgement based on that.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
Edit: Answered. OK. What's the place? Maybe we can make a better judgement based on that.

[/ QUOTE ] I don't think anyone is saying the no happy birthday policy is douchy. But they were promised singing when they ordered dessert. That should have rank over the policy.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

I think the singing of happy b-day in restaurants is the most lame ass thing ever. Well one of the most lame ass anyway. Go to a chain restaurant if you want this kind of crap. Some people want to go out for a nice meal every now and then and not have it be loud, waitresses singing and waitresses coming to your table every 5 minutes to throw liquid in your drink and ask if everything is fine. Maybe this Mexican restaurant is trying to provide that. It would be unusual for a Mexican restaurant but must maybe.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

lol @ anyone saying that this is disgusting, or they are complete douche bags...c'mon, what a joke, if the owner is trying to shift the image of the restaurant, than take your kid to applebees next time if this is going to be such a big deal. the customer is not always right, especially in the restaurant industry.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Yeah, I think the douches here are the ones bitching because no one wants to sing to their 6 year old. Everyone thinks their own kid is the most important person in the world, but guess what? No one else gives a f*ck! I'm glad the restaurant didn't sing him Happy Birthday and I wish every other restaurant I went to would follow a similar policy.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

It sucks, but those are the rules at this place apparently. A kid being disappointed for a little while doesn't seem like a good enough reason to override their policy. The conversation should have went like this:

Manager: Sorry we don't do that anymore.
Dad: OK, no big deal.
(Dad gets his family/friends to sing instead)

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

If you wanted someone to sing to the 6 year old you should have done it yourselves. Why do you want a waiter or waitress to sing like some sort of performing monkey?

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Just sing it yourself as a family. That is much better than having random strangers do it.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Edit: Answered. OK. What's the place? Maybe we can make a better judgement based on that.

[/ QUOTE ] I don't think anyone is saying the no happy birthday policy is douchy. But they were promised singing when they ordered dessert. That should have rank over the policy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Everyone - He didn't know the manager was trying to change their image.
He thought he WAS taking his kid to a place that sings this stuff just like at Applebee's or wherever.

Saying, "Hey...take him to a place that already does such singing" is a weird argument since that is exactly what he was doing as far as he knew.

He even confirmed ahead of time and the restaurant told him they would be happy to do that for him.
WTF more do you want him to do?

He took him to a restaurant where they sing it.
He even asked about it when he got there and they said, "Okey-dokey. Would be glad to."
THEN he found out that whoever told him this made a mistake and that they had changed their policy.


This is way different from going to some place where he wasn't sure whether they would do such singing or not and then insisted that they have to do it just for him.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

If a place tells you that yes they will do that, and of course your kid now knows it is going to happen, then it is complete [censored] for them to change their minds at the end.

I'd simply reply well you know what...I'm trying to change my image and become more thrifty...so im not paying the [censored] bill...then walk out the door.

It seems OOT has a bunch of whiny pussies who can't handle 3 waiters singing happy birthday to someone

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
Signal,

I have mixed feelings about this. Would need to know the specific restaurant to make a decision on whether this was douche or appropriate.

There are tons of places where singing happy birthday is something they do and happens every time you go there. Seems like they should have picked a place like that.

I still don't understand why they didn't just sing happy birthday at the table.

Edit: Answered. OK. What's the place? Maybe we can make a better judgement based on that.

[/ QUOTE ]

Its El Torero, in Milford, CT - The thing is that the dad requested up front and they agreed. There are a ton of other places around the kid could have still had tacos at, like Cancun Charlies, On the Border.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Everyone that is complaining about people spending 30 seconds to sing happy bday you need to seriously lighten up in life. Is it really that much of an inconvenience to you? Maybe you should stop dining at these restaurants youre harping about or perhaps suck it up and deal with it happening once in a blue moon.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
lol @ anyone saying that this is disgusting, or they are complete douche bags...c'mon, what a joke, if the owner is trying to shift the image of the restaurant, than take your kid to applebees next time if this is going to be such a big deal. the customer is not always right, especially in the restaurant industry.

[/ QUOTE ]

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

you idiots do realize that the dad asked most likely the dumbest person in the place, the hostess, if they could do it. she didnt know the policy, and was corrected by the owner. end of story. and seriously, if the hostess said that they dont sing happy birthday do you think the dad is going to pile everyone back in the car and go somewhere else?

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
you idiots do realize that the dad asked most likely the dumbest person in the place, the hostess, if they could do it. she didnt know the policy, and was corrected by the owner. end of story. and seriously, if the hostess said that they dont sing happy birthday do you think the dad is going to pile everyone back in the car and go somewhere else?

[/ QUOTE ]

The hostess should know the policy, as should all of the staff. Really what should he have done? Asked to speak to the manager or owner of the restauant to get the happy bday policy?

To answer the question, yes, we would have most likely gone to one of the other places that were within 10 minutes of driving distance. This was a special night for his son, not for the rest of us. We aren't so lazy we would refuse to take the 1 minute walk back to the car, followed by the 10 minute drive.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
Everyone that is complaining about people spending 30 seconds to sing happy bday you need to seriously lighten up in life. Is it really that much of an inconvenience to you? Maybe you should stop dining at these restaurants youre harping about or perhaps suck it up and deal with it happening once in a blue moon.

[/ QUOTE ]


ya, the owner should take half his staff off the floor, disrupt service and the flow of the night, along with giving up his notion of what he wants his restaurant to be like, since, well, you know, he is the one that is there 18 hours a day, and probably sunk his life savings into it, just so you can placate some 6 year old snot nosed kid. makes total sense.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Everyone that is complaining about people spending 30 seconds to sing happy bday you need to seriously lighten up in life. Is it really that much of an inconvenience to you? Maybe you should stop dining at these restaurants youre harping about or perhaps suck it up and deal with it happening once in a blue moon.

[/ QUOTE ]


ya, the owner should take half his staff off the floor, disrupt service and the flow of the night, along with giving up his notion of what he wants his restaurant to be like, since, well, you know, he is the one that is there 18 hours a day, and probably sunk his life savings into it, just so you can placate some 6 year old snot nosed kid. makes total sense.

[/ QUOTE ]

Maybe the owner should take the entire staff aside for 30 seconds, inform them of the new "no singing policy" and then this wouldn't happen.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Everyone that is complaining about people spending 30 seconds to sing happy bday you need to seriously lighten up in life. Is it really that much of an inconvenience to you? Maybe you should stop dining at these restaurants youre harping about or perhaps suck it up and deal with it happening once in a blue moon.

[/ QUOTE ]


ya, the owner should take half his staff off the floor, disrupt service and the flow of the night, along with giving up his notion of what he wants his restaurant to be like, since, well, you know, he is the one that is there 18 hours a day, and probably sunk his life savings into it, just so you can placate some 6 year old snot nosed kid. makes total sense.

[/ QUOTE ]

Maybe the owner should take the entire staff aside for 30 seconds, inform them of the new "no singing policy" and then this wouldn't happen.

[/ QUOTE ]


meh, this is just going to end up being a thread with people who actually know the restaurant industry, and the rest of you who dont understand much about it bickering back and forth. Im done with it.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

Guids,

A) It isn't that hard to bring together 3-4 people to sing a song. I've worked in the full gamut of restaurants and it was never difficult or disrupting.
B) The owner should do a better job of educating her staff if the policy is that important to the owner.
C) The owner just lost an entire group of customers for the rest of the restaurants existence because she didn't want to placate a 6 year old.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
ya, the owner should take half his staff off the floor, disrupt service and the flow of the night, along with giving up his notion of what he wants his restaurant to be like

[/ QUOTE ]
Since the guy was specifically promised that they would do that before they sat down and he hadn't been told otherwise to this point, yes, she had damn well better do that.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

microbobisright.

[ QUOTE ]
Its El Torero, in Milford, CT

[/ QUOTE ]
What is it about Mexican joints that they love to do this? I swear, all the ones in Phoenix tend to do this elaborate thing where the entire wait staff comes out clapping and singing some birthday song derivative. It's awkward, loud, and you know the staff must just absolutely HATE doing it. Yay let's go be spazzes and make a big scene for someone we don't know who is probably embarrassed too.

That said, they should have honored their word, however unqualified the hostess was to give it. And then post something in the break room that says that they don't do that anymore so there's no more confusion in the future.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
you idiots do realize that the dad asked most likely the dumbest person in the place, the hostess, if they could do it. she didnt know the policy, and was corrected by the owner. end of story. and seriously, if the hostess said that they dont sing happy birthday do you think the dad is going to pile everyone back in the car and go somewhere else?

[/ QUOTE ] It doesn't matter what the dad would have done if the hostess said this or that. She made an agreement with this guy, he would get dessert and a happy birthday song, the restaurant would get money. This is a normal agreement that hostesses make and one the dad had every reason to believe this particular hostess was authorized to make. The restaurant has to honor it if they want any right to expect the dad to honor his part of the agreement.

Would you also think it was fine if they ordered blueberry pie for dessert, and then the restaurant served and expected them to pay for banana splits in stead? I'm sure they wouldn't have gotten up and gone to another restaurant if the hostess had told them they were out of blueberry pies.

Re: Restaurant refuses to sing happy bday to 6 yr old
 

[ QUOTE ]
microbobisright.

[ QUOTE ]
Its El Torero, in Milford, CT

[/ QUOTE ]
What is it about Mexican joints that they love to do this? I swear, all the ones in Phoenix tend to do this elaborate thing where the entire wait staff comes out clapping and singing some birthday song derivative. It's awkward, loud, and you know the staff must just absolutely HATE doing it. Yay let's go be spazzes and make a big scene for someone we don't know who is probably embarrassed too.

That said, they should have honored their word, however unqualified the hostess was to give it. And then post something in the break room that says that they don't do that anymore so there's no more confusion in the future.

[/ QUOTE ]

have you ever been to a macaroni grill? I was there on a service call, and saw some lady's birthday. id rather eat with no pants on in a crowded restaurant, than have an opera singer bring me some cake.