On Changing your Life
 

A number of participants in this forum seem to fall into that slightly tricky age-group just after leaving school. Where you want to make changes but aren’t sure how. Where you want to make changes but don’t know what to change. I thought that maybe a few of us slightly older posters could share our own experiences with the younger set. Maybe they can learn from our mistakes, or see how easy it can be to effect change. It can be difficult when you aren’t sure and you receive conflicting advice as well as pressure to conform to the social norms. So here is how I changed my life.

I grew up in Perth, Western Australia. I breezed through school without doing any work and dropped out of college early on as I couldn’t see the point of getting a degree just for the sake of having a degree. I didn’t know what I wanted to do and I figured that I would do a degree when I was 100% interested and committed to it. I still don’t know what to do by the way.

I worked in bars and clubs, played in bands, acted and a bunch of other stuff. But I wasn't really doing anything that I found worthwhile. And I hadn't experienced anything new or different. Along the way I found a very cool inner-city pad and I started decking it out. I was 22. At one point I ordered a $2500 couch. Now this is 14 years ago. That was an expensive couch. I didn’t really have the money to pay for it but I wanted to get something that would last. At one point I remember being in my apartment and suddenly thinking, ‘what the feck am I doing? I’m ordering a $2500 couch? I’m 22. Why do I want to set myself up here to trap myself? I haven’t even seen another city in my life.’

A bit of a panic attack. Two days later I got a phone call from the couch store. The fabric that I ordered wasn’t available. What did I want to do? I told them to cancel the order. I took it as a sign from the universe. ‘You want to back out kid? OK. Here’s your chance. Now what are you going to do?’

I had a girlfriend. We had been together for a few months. She was older than me and incredibly hot. Way above my station. She decided to move to Sydney to pursue a modeling career. She left. I decided to follow her. I figured that if you’re going to make a change, do it big time. I gave notice on my job and immediately told my parents. No point in hiding it. Things would be challenging enough without that complication thrown in. They were supportive. Do what you have to do, is what they told me. My friends all thought that I was mad. Before I left I had a weird phone conversation with my girlfriend that did not bode well for the future. Whereas before she had been ecstatic that I was coming, now she seemed remote.

I loaded up my motorbike and drove away. At the top of the hills surrounding Perth I stopped and looked back. It was a bit daunting. Behind me was everything I knew. It took my 12 days to reach Sydney. I took the scenic route. On the way I met a French-Canadian dude called Yve who was traveling around on a bike as well. We hooked up and rode together. Adam and Yve traveling around Australia. At night we found a place to pitch our tents and then we drank wine and smoked joints and spoke about life in general. The closer I was getting to Sydney the further I was drifting apart from my girlfriend. The last few days I was an emotional basketcase. I knew when I turned up that things would not be good. But I had to keep going.

I got to Sydney and eventually found my girlfriends house. I had just ridden all the way across Australia and her greeting was a tad on the cold side. She didn’t have the guts to tell me that it was over or that she had found someone else. She just let me share her bed and gave me the cold shoulder. I was young and stupid but I still had a sense of pride. The third morning she left for work. I packed up all my kit and left without leaving a note or saying goodbye. I was alone in the city. I knew nobody. I had under a grand in my pocket. I had nowhere to stay.

So what do you do in this situation? The simple stuff. You find a place to live. You find a job. You make some friends. Ultimately change is about taking the steps. You always have two decisions available to you. Yes and no. Shall I do this? Yes or no. The girl was the catalyst that got me out of my comfort zone. Since then I’ve never looked back. It wasn’t easy. It was tough. But you try not to worry and keep your attention focused on what is in front of you. The decisions that need a yes or a no.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

ads,

I think Chapters 2, 3, and 4+ in this would be pretty damn interesting to read when you get some time and/or desire to share.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
ads,

I think Chapters 2, 3, and 4+ in this would be pretty damn interesting to read when you get some time and/or desire to share.

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't even consider it as I thought it might be a bit much. Me rabbiting on about my life and all. If there's interest I will. I just wanted to get some of you guys to share your own stories as well.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

I'd be very interested in reading more.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
ads,

I think Chapters 2, 3, and 4+ in this would be pretty damn interesting to read when you get some time and/or desire to share.

[/ QUOTE ]

I didn't even consider it as I thought it might be a bit much. Me rabbiting on about my life and all. If there's interest I will. I just wanted to get some of you guys to share your own stories as well.

[/ QUOTE ]

Definetly keep going. I am working on mine and will post ASAP.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

How did you make friends? Sounds easy, but I've found it difficult. I moved 3K miles, new job, new place to live, some cheap furniture, but the friends part has been hard. I've met a few people, both platonic and otherwise, but nothing lasting.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
How did you make friends? Sounds easy, but I've found it difficult. I moved 3K miles, new job, new place to live, some cheap furniture, but the friends part has been hard. I've met a few people, both platonic and otherwise, but nothing lasting.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm in the same situation. I have a few friends, but I struggle to expand my friend base, it is something I really want to do but don't know how to. Part of it is that I am uncomfortable in large social settings where I don't know to many folks. I would like to hear how your story continues. Stories about others lives, even if you think yours may be mundane (although I don't get the sense you do) are helpful to others for various reasons.

Claude

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
ads,

I think Chapters 2, 3, and 4+ in this would be pretty damn interesting to read when you get some time and/or desire to share.

[/ QUOTE ]

i agree, i'd like to hear how you made the move to another country and what that was like.. what made you choose that country etc.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
ads,

I think Chapters 2, 3, and 4+ in this would be pretty damn interesting to read when you get some time and/or desire to share.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd be interested as well

Re: On Changing your Life
 

please do go on

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Yeah, I will, but if you guys shared as well it would be cool. I don't really want this to turn into, "A life of Ads Brag post". I'm knocking up chapter 2 as we speak though.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

not long enough, did read

write the rest of the story, what kind of job you got, place you found, all that stuff

Re: On Changing your Life
 

This is my story I posted in another forum: http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showfl...0&fpart=all After the Ancardo thread I am pretty bored with life change and philosophy discussion.

I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
I'm knocking up chapter 2 as we speak though.

[/ QUOTE ]


Don't do it you're too young for kids. Just kidding.

Looking forward to the next installment.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

[/ QUOTE ]

True. I find it a lot harder even with a girlfriend you're trying to maintain. It's definitely easiest to change your life if you just totally pull up roots and move, start over fresh, it feels a lot harder if you stay tied to something or stay in the same place.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

I suppose that finding a place to live, getting a job and making friends aren’t really that simple. But they are the basic stuff that you need to do. I got myself a room in a dive of a hostel in Kings Cross, which is the red-light bar district of Sydney. Doing it in style. Finding a room was my first concern. Sydney is huge and I wanted to experience the inner-city life, so I narrowed my area down to the Eastern Suburbs. After a lot of calling I made an appointment with this dude who had his own apartment in Potts Point. Potts Point is right on the harbor. Beautiful location. It was a gothic-style apartment block out of the late twenties. The lift had a sliding door and a sliding cage with purple carpet on the walls. It was rad.

I had the interview with him and his girlfriend. I really wanted that place. Apparently about 50 other people wanted the room as well. Whenever I need something I act in my life like I already have it. Strangely enough this usually results in me getting what I need. I immediately went out to the flashiest department store in town and bought an expensive purple towel for my hoped-to-be room. Four days later I called him up. The room was mine. An empty room. With no bed. So I bought a bed, and some sheets and a blanket and pillow and paid the first two months rent and I had about $50 left in my pocket. But I had a place to stay. One step at a time. I also had two new friends – Jeremy and his girlfriend Kate.

I went out and walked from bar to bar until I had a job. It took me about three hours. I started that night. So I had the basics sorted out. Pity that I was emotionally crushed. But I had a new city to explore. I did a lot of walking. I love walking in new cities. Especially if they are pedestrian friendly as Sydney is. I wanted to make some more friends so I signed up to a little writing course. The course was crap, I ended up arguing with the teacher who was just absolutely crap. But I made a new friend. She was in her late forties and was also from Perth. She had also recently made the move across. She was reinventing herself after her kids moved out of home and she ditched her husband. She got me another job as well.

It was a job as a telemarketer for a new-age help guru who ran seminars on mind power and meditation. It was only for ten days and I absolutely hated it. But I resolved myself to do my best and I ended up selling something like 40 courses at $350 a pop over the phone. The guru dude offered me a full time job. I took it with one eye open for something better. The Friday after I started full time the flightly girl who took care of the desktop publishing quit in a huff. I found my boss in a bit of a panic and he explained the problem to me. I immediately told him that I knew heaps about desktop publishing and that I could do the job. Anything to get off those horrible phones. He was ecstatic. I got the job. I had until Monday to learn everything I could about desktop publishing on an Apple Powermac circa 1994.

Just about every job I’ve ever got I’ve lied in some way to get. Tell them what they want to hear. Figure it out as you go along. If you don’t know something, ask. If they quiz you on why you don’t know say that in the other job it was slightly different, blah blah blah. I read the manual back to front over the weekend and on Monday I waltzed in and hoped to hell that I could pull it off. There were some tight moments but I got the job done. I also had some new friends in the small office. We went out for drinks after work. I hoped I wouldn’t bump into my ex.
I play the guitar pretty well and I wanted to meet some muso’s, so I signed up for some advanced jazz guitar lessons at a little guitar shop. The teacher was good, I learnt some new stuff and I met a few cool musicians and we got a little jazz-funk band going. At the same time my boss asked me to help him on his tours. I became his personal assistant. We did weekends in Sydney, then one up in Newcastle. Then we did a week in Brisbane. Flying up, staying in a 5 star hotel, getting paid for it. It was all good. Then we did a two week trip to Cairns. Way up in the tropics. I fell in love with the town. I remember sitting at an outside cafè on the esplanade. I was drinking a coffee. A guy sat down and started talking to me. Just like that. Then a girl. Then another girl. Nobody knew each other. It was just so laid back and natural. I knew that this would have to be my next stop. We went back to Sydney and a few months later we did another trip to Cairns. That sealed it for me. We got back to Sydney and I put in my resignation. My boss wasn’t surprised. He said, “I knew I’d lose you sooner or later.” He gave me a bonus. I packed up my bike, gave away my bed and other stuff I’d collected and set off on the 4500km trip up to Cairns.

I replaced the chain on the bike before I left but not the chain ring. Very silly thing to do. In the middle of fecking nowhere the chain tore itself to pieces. And ripped the chain ring to shreds into the bargain. I hitched 800km back to Sydney. The bike was a write-off as I crashed it when the chain tore up. I was OK. Just a little shaken. A very good mate from Perth called me up two days after I got back to Sydney. He was in town. He had driven across to surprise me. Decided to do what I had done. I told him what had happened and that I was set on going to Cairns. That was cool with him, he’d come to Cairns too. So off we went in his little Suzuki Vitara.

When we got into Cairns around a week later we weren’t talking. Something about him not letting me choose any music on the stereo for the whole trip. He wanted to stay in a campsite out of town which meant that I would have been dependant on him for getting around. I told him to drop me off in the town and catcha later dude. I needed some time by myself. So here we go again. Checked into a nice little boarding house right on the beach. And proceeded to do it all over again. House, job and friends.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

[/ QUOTE ]
This does sound interesting and I'd like to hear stories about this as well, but is this just another way of saying mid-life crisis?

Re: On Changing your Life
 

more please

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
more please

[/ QUOTE ]

Will do tomorrow. It's bedtime now in Italy.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I am interested if anyone here managed to change their life while having a couple of kids, or if you were in a rut and were able to turn it around. I think its pretty easy to change when you are single, you just have to stop being afraid, but if you have kids and a family and get in a rut, it must be alot harder.

[/ QUOTE ]
This does sound interesting and I'd like to hear stories about this as well, but is this just another way of saying mid-life crisis?

[/ QUOTE ]

Somebody picking up and moving to another place is interesting, but its not really hard. They just have to do it. I am wondering if someone has a cool story where they quit their job and opened their own business and were able to succeed, anything along those lines. I saw a cheesy family movie 'In America' recently which made me think about that.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
more please

[/ QUOTE ]

Will do tomorrow. It's bedtime now in Italy.

[/ QUOTE ]

Now I can't wait for the rest of this.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

This is good reading.

[ QUOTE ]
I got myself a room in a dive of a hostel in Kings Cross, which is the red-light bar district of Sydney.

[/ QUOTE ]

Ha, awesome. I feel like i've stayed in everyone of these. Funkhouse w/ the acid art, the black one on the opposite corner which doubles up as a club and has Miss Backpacker awards and the general ones like Globe Backpackers etc. We shared a room with a painter who had no teeth and a healthly drug addiction. He came back to australia 4 months of the year to work 60 hours a week then live in thailand for the rest.

Kings Cross was awesome, there aren't many places you can see a 45 year old hooker tripping on acid while eating your breakfast.

Back on note, I feel like my life is starting to suck atm since i'm not making any decisions about the direction of my life. Maybe i should start a thread, for 30 days El Diablo Forum gets to plan my life day by day/week by week, you tell me what to do/where to go/things to experience that you think will benefit me, i'll pick the best few and stick to them.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Wow great stuff Adsman, more please!

Re: On Changing your Life
 

"It's bed time here in italy" is such a tease

A+, I hope part of this story involves a stint as a journalist or writer.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Everyone:

If you have a story like this, post it. I guarantee you it might seem regular or ordinary to you (it's your life after all), but the rest of us will enjoy it. it is pretty damn hard to write a bad life story.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

i guess my memory is just better than most but i thought everyone knew adsman was living in italy doing rafting, owns a club

Re: On Changing your Life
 

i'm making plans now for a big change: (i intend to be soon) moving from vegas to playa del carmen, mexico.

i've only been there once before, for 2 weeks, but i absolutely fell in love with the place.

any advice for me? for example KKF, i'm curious why you choose not to tell anyone what you do? i've been thinking about this, and i guess i had kind of planned on just telling people i meet down there that i play poker online. i figured it would be easiest that way, so that i wouldn't have to be secretive or try to come up with some kind of story...

but yeah, any other thoughts/advice is welcome.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Does escaping on a boat and being captured by pirates before getting rescued by coastal guard count as good story?
I've been wanting to write this story, but have forgotten the names of all the cities that it took place in. Gotta do some research and get all the names spelling correct first. Also quite busy at work and Chinese New Year coming up so it may be awhile.
If anyone is familiar with Thai geography, please let me know.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Jay: Do a thread and give my advice priority [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] Come visit me in Amherst [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

KKFool: In America is not corny, it won academy awards and deserved them. Also picking up and moving somewhere is not easy, I tried and failed. Also did you write about your life or is that a lie? You like to lie a lot and talk very selectively.

" But I had a new city to explore. I did a lot of walking. I love walking in new cities." - People say this a lot and also say they like to hang out in cafe's and restaurants and watch the city life happen but I find this very boring and unsatisfying. Is anyone else with me on this?

Adsman: When you move from place to place to start a new life, do you find yourself having to deal with a lot of hassles when you move? For instance finding an apt., moving furniture or cleaning out old stuff etc. or maybe it's not a hassle to you. And how much time has it taken you to get comfortable, happy, content in your new life? To make new friends, find good things to do with your times, etc.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]

" But I had a new city to explore. I did a lot of walking. I love walking in new cities." - People say this a lot and also say they like to hang out in cafe's and restaurants and watch the city life happen but I find this very boring and unsatisfying. Is anyone else with me on this?


[/ QUOTE ]

I'm with you bruiser. I actually love those things, but after about 5 minutes I'm going out of my mind - are we going to *DO* something yet or just sit here?

ps. you're not in SF any more?

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]

Adsman: When you move from place to place to start a new life, do you find yourself having to deal with a lot of hassles when you move? For instance finding an apt., moving furniture or cleaning out old stuff etc. or maybe it's not a hassle to you.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, absolutely, especially the first time in Sydney. I couldn't go into detail in the post as it would have reached epic proportions, but sometimes I woke up in the morning with a list of stuff to do as long as your arm and I just couldn't move. I'd have days when I'd just stay at home freaking out in a passive way.


[ QUOTE ]
And how much time has it taken you to get comfortable, happy, content in your new life? To make new friends, find good things to do with your times, etc.

[/ QUOTE ]

It takes as long as it takes. I've never set out to for example, find new friends by such and such period. You just do your thing and by doing your thing the friends stuff tends to fall into line.

All,

For those of you who have expressed interest in writing up your story, this is the thread to do it in. Please feel free to post them up. I was stunned that there was this much interest in my story, so if you're thinking that it won't be interesting you could well be wrong.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Well this thread clinched it, i`m gonna stay in sydney for a month in march and april.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

It was important to me at this stage not to take any backwards steps. So I was determined that I wouldn’t get a job in a bar. There was a large yoga school in town and I went there the next day to talk to the owner. I wanted to see if he would be interested in me running a meditation course. He was cool with the idea. On the way out I saw a notice board. There was a flyer there with details about some share house accommodation. I took the number and gave it a call. A guy with a Canadian accent told me to come down. It was a very large queenslander-style house. These are built specifically for the tropics. A square wooden box on stilts to let the floods come and go underneath. This one was old, ramshackle, falling to bits and absolutely beautiful. It had a little corner covered balcony at the back which was the hang out area. There were six bedrooms. Downstairs was the local offices for The Wilderness Society, which is the Aussie version of Greenpeace.

I moved in the next day. It was a strange place. There was a fruitarian living there. Fruitarians only eat fruit. He had his own fridge which was full of foul smelling fruit. He was also very thin. And a tad neurotic. He was a high school teacher as well. Takes all sorts. There was a pudgy girl who was the over-volenteering kind. And there was a Kiwi rafting guide called Josh. I’d spent most of my teenage years doing whitewater kayaking. How much different could it be? The meditation idea went out the window, I was going to become a rafting guide. I did my usual trick – I walked into the office and lied. The next day I was going down to the Tully river on a commercial trip to ‘check out the river’. To say I was in over my head is a severe understatement. There is a vast difference between kayaking for pleasure and taking customers down a dangerous river in a 14 foot long rubber raft. Night and day. Three things saved me. At the time there was a training course going on and I immediately told the office that I thought the river was a little above my abilities, so would it be ok if I tagged onto the training course? That was fine. The second thing that saved me was my willingness to admit when I didn’t know something. There’s nothing worse than maintaining that you know something when it’s obvious that you don’t. It’s an insult to the intelligence of those who know what they are doing. I’ve actually fired a would-be guide for this. I gave him a chance and told him that I knew he was winging it and that was fine but he had to come clean and admit that he had a lot to learn. He tried to maintain the charade and I told him to take a hike.

The last thing that saved me was my guitar playing. I am killer on the guitar. One night there was a party and the guides had got an impromptu band together. There were about 100 people there. I got up at one point and let rip and they wouldn’t let me stop. I later heard that the general consensus was, ‘Adam sucks balls as a rafter but man can he play a mean guitar. Got to keep him here.’

It took me 8 weeks to get commercial. I did my shotgun three times. A shotgun is a driving test in the boat. One mistake and you’re toast. The last attempt I got passed reluctantly by the head guide. ‘Don’t let me down,’ he told me. Four years later when I left for Africa he told me that I had done a good job but it had been a big risk on his part to pass me. Sometimes someone has to take a chance on you. Because it’s the tropics rafting is a year-round concern. There are 50 guides who work for the company. Cairns is backpacker heaven. If you can’t get laid in Cairns just give up. As rafting guides we had our pick of the town. It was a nice period. My mate that I had driven up with moved into the house with me. His name was Mark. He got a job in the new casino that had just opened in town and ended up running the hotel section. I formed an acid jazz-funk band called Purple Ghetto. We started out with me and a double base. Ended up being eight musicians. We were the musicians musicians band. We played very late so the other muso’s around town could stop and listen.

In this period of my life I made the best group of friends that I have ever had. There were about seven of us and we were a completely eclectic mix. There was the dude who ran the Cairns art gallery, Mark, myself, the hippy Canadian called John, Greg, an older dude who ran the local unemployment office, Steve, another musician and Uncle Mick who was a crazy rafting guide. We started organizing huge parties at our house. Mark would make up cool posters and put them up in all the hotel staff rooms. For two weeks before the parties all the guides from all three companies in town had to invite any hot girl that came onto his raft. Only girls. The biggest one we had about 300 people turned up. The girl-guy ratio was about 4-1. My band played, we had DJ’s, smoke machines, laser lights, fire twirlers, you name it. One party I got talking to this English couple, slightly older than us. I asked them how they had heard about the party. They had finished eating in a restaurant in town and they asked a cabbie to take them to a club that was happening. He told them that everyone in town was going to this party at a house up the road and took them to our place. I looked out the front of the house and there was a line of about 10 taxi’s parked out the front. That’s a sign of a good party.

About a year after moving to Cairns I met a way cool Canadian girl and fell in love. She stopped her round Australia trip in Cairns and moved in with me. It was a great time. Then after about five months she found out that her grandmother was dying. Back to Vancouver she went. Rafting is big in BC. I figured that I’d give it a shot, at least for a summer. I organized a visa and a job and in April 1997 I left Cairns for Vancouver.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

I look forward to reading the next installment! I'm wondering where poker comes in...

Re: On Changing your Life
 

cbloom i'm no longer in SF. that's the move i mentioned that failed [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]. i wonder who else will be posting their own stories in this thread...

Re: On Changing your Life
 

Kid,

"Also did you write about your life or is that a lie? You like to lie a lot and talk very selectively."

Has someone been slipping peyote into your mineral water? You are becoming less and less coherent.

"People say this a lot and also say they like to hang out in cafe's and restaurants and watch the city life happen but I find this very boring and unsatisfying. Is anyone else with me on this?"

No.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

adsman,

great story. keep it coming.

Re: On Changing your Life
 

"Has someone been slipping peyote into your mineral water? You are becoming less and less coherent. "

i don't drink mineral water, i drink straight from the bathroom sink

Re: On Changing your Life
 

adsman,

interesting story so far,keep it up.

sorry to momentarily derail the thread,but i'm curious about your using the word "feck"

as far as i know it is an irish word (not irish language,its more hiberno-english slang i suppose),i was wondering did you pick it up from ireland,or from the tv show father ted,or is it also an australian word?

Re: On Changing your Life
 

[ QUOTE ]

sorry to momentarily derail the thread,but i'm curious about your using the word "feck"


[/ QUOTE ]

Irish friend of mine uses it. I tend to use it as it sits well on the boards when you want to say [censored] but can't as they put a big [censored] over it.

Next installment. If this is starting to get boring someone please tell me so that I won't make a dick of myself.

I landed in Vancouver after my first international flight. I had seen so many of my friends off at airports in the past, now finally it was my turn. My girlfriend Elsa met me at the airport. We had about four or five days together in Van before I had to head up to the rafting base. On the second day I got a phone call at Elsa’s house. It was from another rafting company owner up in Clearwater. He had called Australia to get my number and then called me in Van. He was extremely keen for me to work for him. I had had to choose between his company and another smaller outfit and I had gone for the other one. The reason being that another guide from Cairns was going to be working there. I wanted some familiarity around me. Although I had heard some faint whisperings of the company that I was going to work for having a slightly bad reputation on how they treated their guides. But I had shrugged it off. I had also signed up to an Advanced Wilderness for Leaders first aid course with the company as well as a Rescue 3 course, all of which were requirements for me to get my BC trip leader cert. I felt committed.

I headed up there and over the next two months proceeded to do the courses and check the rivers out. The rivers were balling. There was so much spring run off that we could only run The Coquihalla, a normally simple class III run. This is the river where they shot Rambo. It was a screaming express ride. Monsters holes with monster flips. When the water started to drop a little we were able to run The Nahatlatch. We also ran huge motor powered J-rigs on the Fraser which was running at over 600,000cfs. And oh my god was it cold. I was used to rafting in the tropics in shorts. Guides here were wearing dry-suits. I had purchased some gear in Van but it wasn’t enough. I was freezing my butt off.

The company was a small family owned affair. I had been hired as the 2nd guide. Your priority in the guide list seriously effects your earning potential. Just after I arrived another local company went bust and suddenly there were a bunch of experienced guides available. The owner hired two of them and I was bumped down to 4th on the list. I got shafted and I wasn’t impressed. I was also getting sick of being treated like a [censored] by the owner. The rumors had been not only true but downplayed. We did a trip and an Aussie guide that lived in the area came in to help out. He was much older than me. We got talking on the way back and he told me that he got his money upfront before doing the trip. I told him my situation and asked him what I should do. He told me to wait until I was really needed and then demand that I be reinstated as 2nd guide.

A week later the boss and two other guides were to set out on a 10 day trip from the mouth of the Fraser River. I was definitely required to hold the fort while they were gone. I confronted the owner. We went back and forth for hours. It was the night before they were to leave. We all lived in the same area as their family – they had the house, we had the big shed. So it was a very close affair. The kids were all crying, the wife was hysterical. I was determined to hold my ground. It was the first time in my life that I stood up to a boss in a clearly defined way. We got nowhere. After hours of back and forth I told him that I was leaving the next morning. I got paid out and jumped a bus to Vancouver. I had no job, and not much money but at least I had a place to stay.

When I got to Van my girlfriend was supportive. Two days after I got there she broke down and confessed that she had slept with another guy while I had been back in Australia. The whole trip was going pear shaped. I called a mate I knew and told him to find me a job guiding. I’d work for anyone. He had a contact out on Vancouver Island. It was a sea kayaking company that ran 2-5 day trips in the islands off Nanaimo. I headed out there with my kit. The owner met me at the ferry. He told me that the punters for the next days trip were in a little campground. Was it OK if I camped out with them for the night? I said sure. He looked at me. He was in his late forties, a big bear of a guy with a soft attitude. He reached into his pocket and took out $50. ‘Take that,’ he said. ‘There’s a shop up the road that do good burgers. Tell them I sent you.’

There was a week of work but then his regular guides got back and there wasn’t anymore for me. I made a contact in the same area with another small sea kayaking company that desperately needed a guide. They took me on for the summer. It was the sweetest job that I’ve ever had. We were backed up by motorboat, so in the morning of a trip we would get up, I’d cook, and then we’d leave. The support crew would come in and take down the tents then take them on to the next island where we were stopping for the night. When we arrived there would be a cooler with cold beer ready and all the tents set up. The scenery was breath-taking. I can’t do justice to the place. It is extraordinary. If you ever get the chance to go there, go. At one point Elsa came out to see me. She was desperately sorry. I was enjoying my work so much that I didn’t really want to have conflict in my life. We made up.

Around the end of August the work started to dry up. I was spending more money than I was earning. One morning I woke up in Vancouver and just decided to head home. I’d had enough. Elsa was distraught. I called the airline company and scheduled my flight for the following day. My Canadian adventure was at an end. There was a stopover in Tokyo. I extended it to two weeks and caught up with some friends who were rafting in Japan. I blew all my remaining money partying it on in Japan. I stayed faithful to my girlfriend, although I had a hard time trying to work out why. I just figured that there was no point in doing the same thing myself. I felt that would be a fast track to relationship destruction. I arrived back in Cairns with no money at all. My credit card got eaten by a teller machine they day after I got back. They must have had a major red flag on me. I dropped by my old house. There was a room available. They’d kept it for me. I got my old job back and started the next day.

I flew my girlfriend out for Christmas. She arrived at the airport and when I went to kiss her she turned her head away. WTF?? We drove home and she admitted that she was seeing someone else. Like you couldn’t have told me over the phone and saved me paying for your ticket out?? She left after a couple of weeks and I never heard from her again. I got a letter from Uncle Mick. He was rafting in Uganda of all places. Apparently the river was insane. He sent us a video. The river was insane. The White Nile. 5 meter standing waves. 6 meter holes that just ate boats and spat them out in pieces. I was determined to go. At the end of 1998 Mick told me that I had a job. I had to be there by the end of February. I didn’t have enough time to get the money together. I decided to sell my vintage Gibson Les Paul. I figured that I could always buy another Les Paul, I would never have another chance at an experience like this. A little under two weeks before I was due to leave, 9 tourists were hacked to pieces in the Bwindi National Park in Uganda. What the hell was I getting myself in for?