Possible depression, any advice?
 

I have never had depression or any other psychological disorder before, and I'm thinking I may be depressed right now but not sure.

I'm in college (third year) right now and am going through by far my hardest semester yet, taking courses which I need for my major but which aren't applicable to my interests and which are really difficult for me. Academics have always been my forte until getting to college, and this semester by far I have been the most academically challenged. Overall, it is just mentally grinding and tiring.

I also came down with a pretty rough sickness over Thanksgiving break which made me miss a week of school, just as a bunch of hellish work is all coinciding due to finals approaching. I, fortunately, got an extension on some of the more important things, but I still have a mountain of work that is incredibly daunting to even think of starting, much less finishing.

And to top it all off, I have just broken up with my girlfriend and best friend of 3.5+ years. She still really cares about me, but I have never felt so lonely and alone before. I guess that while we were together, I slowly became less social because she was my best friend and we always did so much together, so I don't really have any friends remotely as (emotionally) close to me as she was. We even lived together this past summer.

So for the past few days, I have had no motivation to tackle my work. I have spent the vast majority of the time in my room, feeling really pathetic. I have slept some but my sleep schedule is completely out of whack. I have barely talked with anyone, and most of my time has just been spent in front of my computer, on 2+2, checking email, randomly browsing Facebook (which makes me sadder looking at all the happy couples, etc.), and I can't bring myself to get my work done.

I don't mean this thread to be self-centered or attention-whoring at all. I just wanted to know if anybody had any good advice or suggestions or if they have been in similar situations. I know that seeking professional help is probably the best thing to do, but I really don't want to turn this into a big thing, and there's less than three weeks to go before this semester is done and I can just go home and relax. I just want to get over this ASAP and just be done with this semester.

Thanks in advance for your help.

P.S. I think this is the right forum, but if not, please feel free to move it. I'd appreciate it not being moved to The Dorm because it's not really about college life and I'd prefer an older, more experienced audience. Thanks.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Odds are excellent. See a doctor.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

There is a forum called "Psychology" that may give you better advice.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Nah, I pretty well covered it.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

I'm not a doctor, but you sound more sad than depressed. It can't hurt to see someone though.

Good luck.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

get drunk and call her

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

YSSCKY

<font color="white"> sorry, someone had to say it. it definitely sounds like this is temporary and will go away; ie you do not sound as if you are clinically depressed. gl </font>

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

If this continues for a few weeks, see a doc.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

It sounds like you are having a rough time right now. I know you must feel very sad, but from what I have learned in several psych classes, true depression is chronic, lasting longer than two weeks and preventing you from completing everyday tasks like washing your hair.

However, you should definitely talk to someone. If your college is anything like mine, there is free counseling on campus and you should take advantage of that.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

OP has basically described how I have felt my whole life. I thought that was just how I am, but maybe not?

Should I score some xanax or something?

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Pls do exercise, FORCE yourself to get out of your house and interact with people. I know a lot, Ive been there, my advice is good and necessary.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
There is a forum called "Psychology" that may give you better advice.

[/ QUOTE ]

Psychology is under General Gambling. This would appear to have nothing to do with Gambling.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Sounds like the large majority of your pain is from the breakup. From what I read I don't think you are depressed.

[cliche]Time heals all.[/cliche]

Concentrate on school the next few weeks and kick ass on your finals. Drop one of your classes next semester and take a lighter load. Concentrate on making some new friends and having a more relaxing and fun semester.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

No need to see doctor.

Hit the gym every day--lots of cardio---swimming would be perfect...get outdoors and go mountain biking, hiking, etc.

guaranteed yr feel better at the end of the week--though u will be sore.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

being depressed from a crappy set of circumstances seems completely normal to me. Stress from school will wear you down, but it's most likely the break up which left you with the kicked when you're down feeling. Obviously only time will help you get over your ex. I have no advice for dealing with your studies other that you know what's best for you, and it's almost over so just do it. Of course telling myself that that never worked for me, but I most likely experience clinical depression from time to time. Hopefully pouring yourself into your studies will take your mind of you personal life.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
No need to see doctor.

Hit the gym every day--lots of cardio---swimming would be perfect...get outdoors and go mountain biking, hiking, etc.

guaranteed yr feel better at the end of the week--though u will be sore.

[/ QUOTE ]

I agree with charlie, although I was going to suggest weightlifting, but you get the picture.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Are there any tips or tricks to motivate myself to work? I can't find any motivation to begin, and I think starting is the hardest part. I open up assignments and just stare at them for a minute and just close it because I have no motivation to start. Thanks.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Are there any tips or tricks to motivate myself to work? I can't find any motivation to begin, and I think starting is the hardest part. I open up assignments and just stare at them for a minute and just close it because I have no motivation to start. Thanks.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, I had those problems too. I dropped out, got a job and started drinking. Let me know when you figure it out.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

If you see a doctor they won't have you making crazy paintings to determine if you are insane.

Many completely sane people have been helped greatly by seeing a psycologist. You have counselors on campus. Use them!

The hardest part will be making that appointment but after you get over that hump you will be glad that you did

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

As a fellow depressive, I caution you against anything that may contribute to the effect of spiraling downward. You need to spiral upward and out of it.

Stay away from facebook! And anything that rubs in your sadness and loneliness. That includes drugs and booze.

Get yourself into work, if not overwork. This is the PERFECT opportunity to not only excel, but make excelling a positive definition in your spirit of who and what you are. Work like hell. You have nothing better to do, right? Kick the hell out of your challenges to the best of your ability and in your own soul you will be a hero regardless of whether you meet anyone else's standards. You will know YOU DID IT.

Working extremely hard also does the vital task of taking your mind off things until you have the necessary distance as a depressive to consider them in perspective. A true depressive can find himself with no way out as each thing gets exaggerated in importance until just drawing a breath and moving from a chair feels like an admission of crushing defeat and some perverse proof of failure. Each thought can seem pointless and so self-defeating that complete numbness can seem the only psychological salvation. Stay out of that sh*t.

Pile on accomplishments one by one, slowly, being sure to recognize each one. You MUST, to be emotionally and truly honest, accept every good thing and accomplishment with the identical honesty you accept every disappointment. You are cheating otherwise, and pointlessly self-indulgent and wallowing. At that point, you can only blame yourself.

Credit yourself instead. Work, work, work like a friggin' monkey. I guarantee you what with incremental improvement every day, you cannot help but have accomplishments. From there, it's a matter of acknowledging to yourself your accomplishments. And once you get the ball rolling, you make momentum a possibiity. A ball sitting there motionless does nothing. You need that momentum. Push yourself! Even if you don't care, don't believe, don't have any faith in it.

Slowly, relentlessly, IF you are honest, life will seem better. Unless you refuse to value yourself, and choose to wallow in a downward spiral. If you do the latter, forget what I said and just get medicine. And even that may be too little too late, because you can't escape volition no matter how much depression may suggest that you can, and that it is irrelevant.

The worst thing you can do is wallow. Like smokers find it near impossible to quit smoking if they hang around the people and activities involved with smoking(parties, old smoker friends, etc.), and drinkers find the same thing, you can't kick depression if you keep growing and nourishing in your mind the same old thought and desire patterns that call forth your depression. Facebook. looking at old pics of your girlfriend, whatever ... you have to dump that sh*t.

If you are a major depressive, you can't. So you have to substitute it with something. Instead of substituting it with something negative, find yourself a huge challenge and substitute that. You have big college worries right now.

This is a fantastic opportunity for you.

After you conquer college problems to the best of your ability, so you don't suddenly deflate when you've reached your goals that were keeping you healthy. Plan out new challenges before you finish the old.

DO NOT let yourself wallow. DO NOT rehearse old behavior and old memories, imprinting them all deeper.

GET BUSY!

Prisoners of war never get cancer. They only get it after they're released. Here's a phrase I hate -- "Think about it."

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

I wanna play therapist....

Your have been overburdened with work.
Your situation is very much like that of a car with a flat battery. You need to recharge your battery. If you don't, you won't get anywhere.

You basically need to do something that you enjoy and get your mind of things. This could be a 20 minute jog every day, or it could be some hardcore partying every thuesday night. Or building model airplanes. It doesn't really matter...

The breakup with your girlfriend makes you sad, which doesn't really sound abnormal.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Thanks for this really helpful post. I think it's a really good idea to use this time to really excel in my classes and study hard, but how do I find the motivation? My problem is just finding the one push to get me rolling. Thanks.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Blarg, it amazes me how you're constantly right about 99% of the time. [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

If you have a timer set it for 15 minutes. When the 15 minutes start, you start working.

Once you get past that 15 minutes, you'll be somewhat into the subject and it won't be hard to keep rolling.

The most important thing is to start.

Good luck,

The Poker Mom

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Hey I recently went through litterally the same stuff. Girlfriend of over 2 years (even cheated on me and broke up with me and started dating the other guy), which is very out of character as she is a very sweet girl. Immedietly after i had lots of different illnesses and my sleep schedule like yours, became horrible (going to bed at 8am - 7pm for no reason) and of course as she was my best friend i didnt have many people to hang out with (I had even quit my fraternity due to issues involving her).

My advice to you is to go to a doctor, if anything you can get some sleep pills to get you going to sleep at the right time and will feel better about it. Also once finals and such clear up and you have time to just do nothing all day over winter break, try and get out.

Good luck with everything, I know how much it sucks and with everything just piled on it gets to you, but time off and reconecting with friends really helps (and so does fixing that sleep schedule).

Edit: oh yeah and exercise is always nice, plus when your there you can meet lots of attractive in shape girls, which if anything helps give you some new goals and confidence

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Are there any tips or tricks to motivate myself to work? I can't find any motivation to begin, and I think starting is the hardest part. I open up assignments and just stare at them for a minute and just close it because I have no motivation to start. Thanks.

[/ QUOTE ]

You could go talk to some kind of campus therapist (I have no idea about what they are called) about this. They will most likely, like the majority of OOT, tell you to do something that you enjoy before sitting down to work.

If you sit down to work, but don't get anything done. Just accept it, and go do something else for 30 minutes, and then return.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Yes, you're depressed, but you will be all right. It's normal to feel bummed out after a breakup. Concentrate on school/work. In time you will realize that women are like buses, they come by every ten minutes. Now is not the time to get bogged down in a serious relationship. Once you have finished school and are making good cash working, there will be plenty of time and opportunity for relationships. It sucks now, but the future will be better.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Thanks for this really helpful post. I think it's a really good idea to use this time to really excel in my classes and study hard, but how do I find the motivation? My problem is just finding the one push to get me rolling. Thanks.

[/ QUOTE ]

Unless your planning on going to Law/Business School your GPa doesn't matter much...all people care about is you got the degree.

College is for partying and getting laid..not studying hard.
This is probably the real reason yr girlfriend split. Your lazy.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
There is a forum called "Psychology" that may give you better advice.

[/ QUOTE ]

Psychology is under General Gambling. This would appear to have nothing to do with Gambling.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yeah, but you can always attach "it causes me to lose money at poker" on the end of any psych-related problem.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Climb the hardest wall you've ever done or do something else (not drugs) that gives you an adrenaline rush.

Driving a motorcycle or a car to the limits, skydiving, downhill biking, fighting (ring or street), etc. The list is endless, just find something that you can afford.

Even though you have tons of work, you need to take some time off regularly and do something you really enjoy.

I've never tried antidepressants, but I'm pretty sure that actually doing something works much better than sitting on your ass and popping pills.

NP: Megadeth - Hangar 18

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

http://www.daf.com.ar/IMG/notas/twilight/lector.jpg

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

I kept trying to work, couldn't get anything done, so I did something else for 15-30 minutes, returned, still couldn't get anything done, etc. And again, I didn't get proper sleep. So tired of this.

I guess I'm taking a big step here for myself, but I just made an appointment to see a counselor (not sure if it'll be a psychologist or a psychiatrist or neither) today.

Thanks everyone for the help. It really is helpful reading that people have had similar experiences. Hopefully I'm over this really soon, I've never felt so out of control / helpless before.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Counselor is good. It is pretty much never a bad thing to talk to someone. Someone that is an unbiased listener and will give you perspective.

You don't sound like you need medication.

Honestly, the fresh air/exercise people are dead on.

I have battled depression for 15 years. It recurrs. However, when I start to notice my ability to function declining, I try to start modifying my behavior in the following ways:

1) Exercise at least 6 days per week.
2) Spend 30 minutes outside in the sunshine, daily.
3) Eat 3 nutritious meals a day. (A 4 pm breakfast of cold pizza, some hot wings at a bar while getting trashed, and a 4 am Taco Bell run do NOT constitute 3 nutritious meals.)
4) Call friends and family and schedule activities...appointments that require me to shower, dress, and meet someone for something other than work.

This will often bring me up to a level where I can function normally.

Edit: I edited in "try to". I'm far from perfect.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Oh, and 5) (this one is tough while you are in college, but you need to do it) Schedule a time to go to bed and a time to wake up. Stick to it. Don't sleep or lie in bed outside of sleep time, even if you don't sleep much during sleep time.

I have been medicated for depression several times, including now. But the disabling part I can kind of manage myself. There are other reasons that I am on the medication at the moment, which you don't seem to have. But you may PM me if you like.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

I always thought the term 'depression' was just an excuse for someone who doesn't have the willpower to do the things they need to do in order to live 'happily'. Or perhaps that's just my excuse for feeling like you all the time.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

Sounds like you still love her. Go back and make things right with your girl. Play her "Walked outta heaven" by Jagged Edge

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

IMHO, junior year in college is the toughest. And breaking up with a long-term girlfriend is even tougher. Most people have given you really good advice (get out, move, do something) - but that is easier said than done sometimes. Usually, the only people who can truly understand that are people who have been there.

You may be "clinically" depressed and you may not be. You could just be really sad right now and need some time to cope with it. But, if you let it go on, it will not get any better. And drinking will make it worse.

You have done the right thing by seeing a counselor. And if you don't like this one, find another one. Regardless of how unhappy you are - if you can't get up and go to classess and do you work - then you have problem. The fact that you recognize it is really good. That is the first step to handling it and getting your life back in order.

And of course, I will ask - can you talk to your parents?

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

stay off of facebook. make sure you do some cardio (if not a lot) every day. if you still don't feel better after awhile, then see a psychiatrist, NOT just a GP.

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

[ QUOTE ]
Blarg, it amazes me how you're constantly right about 99% of the time. [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Blarg is funny that way. Most of the time he's amazingly insightful and right on point, but that one percent he strikes out like no one else =)

Swede

Re: Possible depression, any advice?
 

You guys with the suicide references are really [censored] hilarious. Why don't you all [censored] off and die.