Physical violence with roomates
 

Dig this.

I have 2 roommates that I hang with and both of them show lack of respect. It's getting bad that they will disagree with everything I say and belittle me when I make points that are correct by disagreeing in a condescending way. I take it. I accept that they only gang up on me because it's obvious they have both have low self esteem, no friends, introverted lifestyle, etc.

As I said, it's getting bad and I am considering challenging one of them to a fight. Getting myself hurt doesn't concern me I just think if I challenge them by stop taking their [censored] they will understand that there will be consequences if they try to pull my chains. You could say that I am looking for a way to prove to them undeniably that they should show respect.

Again, I don’t want to injure them seriously, I don’t want to create conflict but they keep pushing me to make me feel like I have to prove myself to them somehow and words have no effect, they are pointless.

I don't hate them or blame them for their ignorance, the house we live in is great aside from the occasional [censored] we deal with we have a great time.

Basically, I'm wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation and has confronted their antagonizers [sp?] and afterwards had changed the whole household dynamic for standing up for themselves or it resulted in a lifelong vendetta.

Thanks OOT, don't let me down.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Confront them. If things do not improve ignore them.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Don't hang out with them, don't talk to them, problem solved.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
Don't hang out with them, don't talk to them, problem solved.

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Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

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Don't hang out with them, don't talk to them, problem solved.

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I hang with them becuase they live in the house. We live in a house which is like a community. Hiding in my room is not solving the problem.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
the house we live in is great aside from the occasional [censored] we deal with we have a great time.


[/ QUOTE ]

It seems you are the one dealing with the [censored] - not them. To be honest, this has kind of a "wife-beating" feel to it - like everything is great, until there is some kind of conflict and then you get verbally abused.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Soko,

I can't even articulate how incredibly stupid I think your idea is.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Why is that? I think fighting is fun.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

if you must resort to violence, you have already lost

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

LET'S GET IT ON

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

kill them while they sleep

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Soko,

If anyone ever tries to start that sort of "condescending agreement" you have to check it right there before it spirals into your current type of situation.

Since it has gone this far, I would speak to them separately and seriously. Before I started I would let them know I needed a few minutes of their time and that you had something serious to talk about. Let each one know that you talked to the other one and that it is not cool for them to treat you that way. Let them know that you notice it and it bothers you. Then talk to them both at the same time and tell them the same thing.

If they start again, call them on it. When they agree with you sarcastically, say "Excuse me? It seemed like you were being sarcastic." If they continue, you have to check it with something like "Do you have something to say bitch? It sounds like you do," or some similar posturing to let them know that you are not joking. Then after they back down, laugh and continue the conversation.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

I don't have to resort to violence, we have verbal battles that last and they usually always wind up being wrong but still insist on denying the truth to save face. I think if I mount one of them and slap him across the face a few times and make him say uncle he will learn to stop talking smack.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Alternatively, you can beat them at their own game. When they belittle you, fight back, mock their small pensises, tiny IQ's and general ugliness.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

I was in similar situation about 2 years ago in college. Your roomies sound like one of mine, I kicked his ass one night when he was f'ed up. He got the point and we were roomies for 2 more years. gl

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Slapping a dude is one of the gayest things ever.

Maybe you should just jizz on their faces one night while they sleep. That'll teach em.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

move

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

I would never move as this is my house just as much as it is theirs. This house kicks ass and personally find physical confrontation much less of a hassle then moving all my [censored] out, finding a new place and moving in.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

yasher, don't you think jizzing up their rear ends would make more of a statement?

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
I would never move as this is my house just as much as it is theirs. This house kicks ass and personally find physical confrontation much less of a hassle then moving all my [censored] out, finding a new place and moving in.

[/ QUOTE ]
When I was 19 I had a roommate I wanted to kill. He owned the house though, so even if I killed him and got away with it, I'd probably have to move. Anyway, like me back then you seem unable to the middle ground between them not respecting you and fisticuffs.

Someone upthread had a great point about one-on-one conversations, if they don't respect you more after that then simply escalate things until they do.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
It's getting bad that they will disagree with everything I say and belittle me when I make points that are correct by disagreeing in a condescending way.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd like to see a transcript of one of these exchanges.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

SIITP

Make them your beeyatches

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
It's getting bad that they will disagree with everything I say and belittle me when I make points that are correct by disagreeing in a condescending way.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd like to see a transcript of one of these exchanges.

[/ QUOTE ]

Okay. Tonight the argument that brought about this post:

ass1: did you plant those seeds over there?

me: yeah but I didn't put topsoil over them so I'm afraid the bugs will eat them

ass2: bugs don't eat seeds [censored]

me: yes they do

ass2: no they dont

me: yes they do, they have nutrients in them

ass2: oh yeah, like what? (In a challenging tone)

me: like fat and carbs

ass1: oh yeah right, plants have fat? Hahaha

ass2: hahahah

me: yes.... have you not heard of vegetable oil?

ass2: that's oil, oil isn't fat

me: omg... yes it is, have you ever looked at the label on peanut butter, etc?

them: (realizing they are wrong) no that’s completely different, the oil turns to fat inside the body

me: *head about to explode*

both of them: you have no idea what you are talking about, oh right, so if you eat vegetables you will get fat? right? blah blah blah, don't forget to trim the fat off your asparagus, etc etc etc for maybe 15 minutes unprovoked

I look it up on wiki, okay I’m right, probably one of the dumbest arguments ever but wtf, I'm relaxing next to my pool while they laugh between each other about a subject they know nothing about just to provoke me.

I don't get angry. It took me standing up and saying that if he want's to keep [censored] with me he can fight me, he said okay fine and that ended it for a moment until that broke off in to some dumb argument about how seeds don't need fertilizer to grow in to a full plant because seeds can germinate in a paper towel without fertilizer.

Some of the dumbest [censored] imaginable.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]


Some of the dumbest [censored] imaginable.

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You said it. This was sooo disappointing. I want to fight you.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]


Some of the dumbest [censored] imaginable.

[/ QUOTE ]

You said it. This was sooo disappointing. I want to fight you.

[/ QUOTE ]

I accept.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
Okay. Tonight the argument that brought about this post:

ass1: did you plant those seeds over there?

me: yeah but I didn't put topsoil over them so I'm afraid the bugs will eat them

ass2: bugs don't eat seeds [censored]

me: oh, ok

[/ QUOTE ]

This sort of stuff happens because they don't like you, not because they are jerks or losers or anything. The two don't really have any relation to each other. Get new friends.

The other possibility is that they know it makes you angry when they argue over stuff so they do it even more because it's hilarious when people get worked up over stuff like seeds. Just chill and everything will be back to normal in this case.

Edit: Meet me behind the bleachers at the sunny spot after 6th period.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

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me: yeah but I didn't put topsoil over them so I'm afraid the bugs will eat them

[/ QUOTE ]

I've never met you ... but I think I can take you, you procrastinating seed-planting bug-fearing mope!

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

you'll probably get beat up

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Words words words. I told you I accept, bring it.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
Words words words. I told you I accept, bring it.

[/ QUOTE ]

LOL.

Question: why don't you take this attitude with your mean, dumb roomates?? Problem solved.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Words words words. I told you I accept, bring it.

[/ QUOTE ]

LOL.

Question: why don't you take this attitude with your mean, dumb roomates?? Problem solved.

[/ QUOTE ]

I do but I don't make the first move because you can't take back violence like you can take back words. Hence this thread.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

I would really enjoy watching you challenge, and then fight your roommates. What city do you live in? Can you videotape the whole thing and post it?

As you should have learned in 3rd grade, they bother you because you let them bother you. Grow a friggin thicker skin and find a way of solving the problem without your stupid-ass fight idea.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
I would really enjoy watching you challenge, and then fight your roommates. What city do you live in? Can you videotape the whole thing and post it?

As you should have learned in 3rd grade, they bother you because you let them bother you. Grow a friggin thicker skin and find a way of solving the problem without your stupid-ass fight idea.

[/ QUOTE ]

You suck. Alot. And are boring.

I live in Las Vegas.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

try not to let them goet under your skin. if you dislike them, have as little to do with them as possible. just ignore their barbs.
however, if you feel this is impossible/outside the bounds of your charecter, lay down the gauntlet. Next time one of them harrasses you, tell him to stop, or else you will fight him. only do this if you are prepared to actually follow through. also, only do this if you feel they are not the type of people who will sue you/call the police.
i generally feel violence is a very poor way to solve conflict, but if they persist in their ways despite your best non violent efforts, change tactics.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
It's getting bad that they will disagree with everything I say and belittle me when I make points that are correct by disagreeing in a condescending way.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd like to see a transcript of one of these exchanges.

[/ QUOTE ]

Okay. Tonight the argument that brought about this post:

ass1: did you plant those seeds over there?

me: yeah but I didn't put topsoil over them so I'm afraid the bugs will eat them

ass2: bugs don't eat seeds [censored]

me: yes they do

ass2: no they dont

me: yes they do, they have nutrients in them

ass2: oh yeah, like what? (In a challenging tone)

me: like fat and carbs

ass1: oh yeah right, plants have fat? Hahaha

ass2: hahahah

me: yes.... have you not heard of vegetable oil?

ass2: that's oil, oil isn't fat

me: omg... yes it is, have you ever looked at the label on peanut butter, etc?

them: (realizing they are wrong) no that’s completely different, the oil turns to fat inside the body

me: *head about to explode*

both of them: you have no idea what you are talking about, oh right, so if you eat vegetables you will get fat? right? blah blah blah, don't forget to trim the fat off your asparagus, etc etc etc for maybe 15 minutes unprovoked

I look it up on wiki, okay I’m right, probably one of the dumbest arguments ever but wtf, I'm relaxing next to my pool while they laugh between each other about a subject they know nothing about just to provoke me.

[/ QUOTE ]

You and your roomates are all morons. If I actually heard that conversation take place I would shoot you all. I don't know how you pick your roomates, but you didn't do very well.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Even though your roommates are witless in their criticism, you do kind of sound like a tool deserving of mockery. Come on, bickering over whether or not bugs are going to eat your seeds? They are making fun of you because they know you're weak and from the argument you sound pretty whiney. Fighting will just make the situation awkward and most likely put you in an even more dominated position. Challenging someone to a boxing match is somewhat legit but it will probably be a slap fest since I'm guessing none of you have any skill. What are the physical stats of you and your roommates?

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I would really enjoy watching you challenge, and then fight your roommates. What city do you live in? Can you videotape the whole thing and post it?

As you should have learned in 3rd grade, they bother you because you let them bother you. Grow a friggin thicker skin and find a way of solving the problem without your stupid-ass fight idea.

[/ QUOTE ]

You suck. Alot. And are boring.

I live in Las Vegas.

[/ QUOTE ]

you don't live in las vegas, you dumb [censored]

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

[ QUOTE ]
You and your roomates are all morons. If I actually heard that conversation take place I would shoot you all. I don't know how you pick your roomates, but you didn't do very well.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'd say none of them did very well. I should probably not get into this Magic thing....

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

Take the middle ground. Stand up for yourself without resorting to violence. It's called being assertive.

There's alot of material out there. You might want to read up a bit and practice your assertiveness skills on your roomies.

Re: Physical violence with roomates
 

on a small scale, don't allow them to trap you into stupid arguments. if its about something important, ask questions about their position to prove how BS they are. have them defending their position instead of vice-versa. proving their argument is BS should be much easier than the route your taking.

but as bluffoon said, earning their respect requires you to be assertive, and simply not put up with their crap. good luck